It's 7pm..I'm feeling blue, lost and hopeless And seriously speaking, I don't know who else to ask for advice so I'm asking it here in the hope that I'll get sincere advice.I'm 20,I recently met this guy of 25 (about 2 mths ago).After just a single conversation, he told me he feels he can completely cliq with me and that he had feelings for me.I found that hard to believe but I was complimented because of his good looks, good manners, approach, etc.I know this is childish infactuation so I havent given in to him eventhough he keeps pestering me to be with him in a serious relationship.What bugs me about him is that he "fell in love" with me so quickly.I've always believed that if you can fall in love so quickly with someone then you can just as surely fall out of love quickly.He's a nice guy and all.Sincere, loving..,etc. He had a violent past though.Basically I don't want to lose him as a friend but I don't want to commit blindly either.He refuses to take things slow.What should i do?
2006-12-13 22:43:47 · 12 answers · asked by Stranger In Paradise 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks everyone for your advice. You know what, you guys are right. If he really cared for me enough, he'd give me time and let me take things slow. While I don't believe he's after sex (he's too nice of a guy for that),I do think he's emotionally unstable..and perhaps I should just walk away now before it's too late.Over these weeks although I insist on taking things slow, he's somehow made it like we're "together". Like it's an unspoken understanding. We've gone out alot and I like him as a friend. I'm scared of him though. He hasn't hurt me physically yet but whenever he gets angry, he punches the walls, etc and hurts himself.I wish there was something I could do to change him before I leave him but he just never listens. I've tried being loving,I've tried talkin to him...right now, it's reached the stage where he's saying that if I ever leave him, he'll commit suicide.He's attempted suicide in his previous relationship and I know he's capable of doing it,he's not just threatening.
2006-12-13 23:18:42 · update #1
follow your heart ........life is just so short.
2006-12-13 22:55:05 · answer #1 · answered by btreach 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has feelings for you from a single conversation. Pestering you to have a serious relationship. He "fell in love" quickly. He has a violent past. Refuses to take things slow.
What??? He wants SEX!!! Yes, you can have feelings for someone quickly. Some people just click. You know like when you meet a girl and conversation is easy and you like her immediately. What behavior does he have that would make you say he is pestering you and why doesn't he want to take things slow??? Because he wants SEX. Once you give him SEX you give him all of your power. If he truly has "feelings" (love) for you he would know not to pressure you and to not expect you to fall in bed with him. What he has a violet past?? Past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. Is he in "anger management" or therapy? It sounds like you have your priorities straight. The only way a long term relationship will last is to take it slow and get to know each other. What are his goals and values? Are they the same as yours? Your gut is telling you this is not OK. Go with your gut!!! Good luck and get out and do things that you enjoy to fight that lost and hopeless feeling.
2006-12-13 23:06:51 · answer #2 · answered by belle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take things slow and don't be rushed into anything. If he really loves you he'll respect your thoughts on a relationship.
2006-12-13 22:50:02 · answer #3 · answered by Rocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i replaced into style of feeling an analogous way. do no longer waste it gradual thinking no count if a guy likes you or no longer, be straight away up approximately it. you do no longer would desire to be strange approximately it. in simple terms get closure. So ask him if he needs to pass out, etc.
2016-10-05 07:24:06 · answer #4 · answered by haslinger 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him u r not comfortable enough to take the relatioship into the next level...
and even then if he insists, then dump him...
even his friendship will be very dangerous
2006-12-13 22:56:01 · answer #5 · answered by richard k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are doing it. The fact that you say he is "pestering" you is a clear sign that you don't feel the same way about him that he feels about you. (Or says he does!) I believe you are correct in your cautious mindset. (I think he just wants to "bed" you!)
2006-12-13 22:49:46 · answer #6 · answered by the_pharaoh109 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Violent past as in........ ???
I think you are mature enough to have had this thought process... just think a bit more and do what ur mind tells u..
2006-12-13 22:55:27 · answer #7 · answered by pembanboy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your true feelings. Take it slow.
2006-12-13 22:47:52 · answer #8 · answered by winona e 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if he really cares about having a relationship and not a sexcapade he will give you breathing room otherwise he is not for you
2006-12-13 22:54:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Brutal past - beware, he is probably a spoiled brat who demands to have everything his way. I would cool it down and see how he behaves................ good luck.
2006-12-13 22:54:40 · answer #10 · answered by thomasrobinsonantonio 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um...i suggest you talk to him. tell him that you dont want to take things up so fast. telll hjim how you feel and that you need time
2006-12-13 22:47:32 · answer #11 · answered by vrules 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋