Do any of you have kids that are 5 or more years apart in age?

Question

Ok see i have a 5 year old son and i am thinking about having another baby (I'm 27) and i am asking you all did your older kid(s) pay any bit of attention to the youngest, did they get along?

Do you think it would be a huge age gap if i were to have another one maybe in the next 2-3 years from now?
Also were your kid(s) jealous of the new baby?

Thanks

Answer 1

Well I did not, but my mother did. I am 12 almost 13 years older than my (only) sister. I Love it (now she is in her teens I am a bit annoyed) but I got alot of my moms attention & when she had my sisiter I wanted some independance so my sister got the attention in many was of a only child. I loved helping out & but I did chose to have mine close together, I guess in part because my sister has never been a friend or a playmate so Iwanted to give my children that. Buy either way it is great & your decision will be right for you. Best of Luck

Answer 2

My boys are only a few years apart... but.. My first dad passed away and my mom didn't remarry until I was 8. Then she adopted two kids when I was 10. I was soooo excited! I had always wanted a brother or sister and I got BOTH! My sister and I argued all the time haha even though I was ten years older and really should have known better. But we were soo close. When I turned 16 I got to drive her to first grade. Now I am 23 and she is 13 .. oh... I wish you could see the emails I get about this boy and can I take her shopping for an outfit. It's a lot of fun... My husbands brother is 6 years older then him and my husband adores him still (at 26) . About the jealousy .. I have a 3 yr old and a 10 month old.. jealousy is always a bit of an issue no matter what the age gap

Answer 3

I have a 10 month old, a 3.5 yr old and an 8 yr old. I think a gap of 3-5 years is ok. Then the older kid(s) help with the younger. My kids were not jealous about the new baby. They just need to be included. I am 8 years older than my brother and I really dont interact with him too much only bc he is at a totally different maturity level than I am.

Answer 4

Ok, in my family, my mom would generally have a new baby 2 years after the last one for the first five kids. But me, I came 17 years after my sister, the fifth child. And we all get along just fine. In fact, my sister was kinda relieved that she was no longer the youngest. If we can handle a 17 year age difference, I'm sure your son can handle a 5 year age difference or even more. You should not worry about jealousy. No matter what, there will always be sibling rivalry, anyway. You can't avoid it. But there will always be love. As long as you are careful not to play favorites and keep on giving attention to your son, there should be minimal problems.

Answer 5

I don't really know, but I'll soon find out. I'm 27 and pregnant, and I also have an 11 year old son. I hope it goes well for us both!
I have an older friend that has a son that is 10 years older than his sibling, and she says they have a wonderful relationship. She says they were always too far apart in age to really do much fighting, and the older was always protective of the little one, while the little one always looked up to the older one. Hopefully, it would work out something like that :) Good luck to you!

Answer 6

I have four children ages 20, 15, 5 and 3. I love the age difference between them, the older children help me with the younger ones. My son Desmond is the eldest and when my daughter Dominique was born he was 5 years old and always willing to help, now my daughter is 10 years older than my 5 year old son Jamie and she thinks she's his mother. Finally my youngest is Jordan who is 3years, he and Jamie get along great, however every now and then I see them competing for my attention but otherwise they all get along great.

Answer 7

No jealousy because my new baby was also their new baby. the older kids are very protective of "their" new baby. There is adjustment but explaining that their new baby does this or needs that just makes the older child more helpful. The older children help care for the baby by running tome when the baby crys and playing with the new baby. It is kinda like getting a new puppy there is some gross stuff some headaches but also lots of cuddly fun. Get your older child excited during the pregnancy and you will have a devoted older sibling.

Answer 8

I have a nephew that is going to be six and my daughter is 16 months old. Oh my gosh he is soooooo jealous of her! He was ALWAYS the center of attention before and now he's not the youngest grandchild and is an only child. He's slowly learning to be gentle with her when he sees her and that it's OK to share his toys with her. He, too, thinks that her drooling was pretty disgusting when she was teething and wants to know why she does everything that she does. Inquisitive little guy.

If you choose to have another baby, I would definetly, through books or video, educate your son about babies and their development BEFORE you get pregnant. You, too, may have quite a bit of jealousy and your son will have to get used to the fact that he's not the complete center of attention anymore.

Answer 9

I have a 5 year old boy and a two month old boy. My oldest loves the fact that we have a new baby in the family, and he does get a little jealous at times. However my wife and I make it a special point to be sure that the oldest has special times or dates with us. Just to assure him that he is loved and that he gets that special time of just him. As far as financially goes, one will graduate college about the same time the next one enters college. I personally think this is the best way to have children.
And my son can't wait to get home from school to hold and talk to his new baby brother.

Answer 10

I had my son when my cousin (who has lived with us for over two years now) was four. He was defiantly jealous at first but it's a matter of taking time to give both kids attention.

It's all a matter of time management. I would separate them at first and get them on different routines so that they could have Tia/Mom time. My husband was not at home when I gave birth to my son so that was rough but it just takes time.

So far, there are no sparks of jealousy. My cousin (5yrs) has no resentment toward my boy. They share a room and play all the time together.

Like I said it's all about time management and routine. If you've got them both set on a schedule then it all goes smoothly without jealousy.

EDIT TO ADD:

Silence is right. If you get your son involved (changing diapers, putting on clothes, batheing the baby...etc) then there will be no sparks.

There's a great book out there by Dr. Phil--"Family First: Your Step-by-Step Plan for Creating a Phenomenal Family". I disliked him at first but after reading his book he has a lot of great points. One of which he talks about definitave roles in a family. Every family member would have some responsiblity and feel important to the family as a unit. It really is a great book. You should pick it up if you get the chance or put it on your Christmas List!