He said he's having family probs at the moment and needs space,i still dont understand though why he hasnt at least txt to let me know he still cares for me. He avoids me at work and it's been a while now since i seen him. I think about him all the time and it's eating me up inside. He's completely given me the cold shoulder yet the other day he said he stil loves me,why do you think he wont keep in touch though?
2006-12-13 17:40:53 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i won't profess to know what is going on in his mind at all, but you have to work off the signals he is giving you.
By avoiding you, he wants space from you, whether it's permanent or temporary you won't know until he chooses to be man enough to talk to you. Even if it is a family problem, i don't see why he wouldn't explain anything to you.
I know it is difficult, but i think that you are going to have to show him that you are an independent female. Stop hanging around waiting for him to say that everything is all right. Talk to your girlfriends to get some solace. But make sure he understands that he only gets out of the relationship what he is willing to put in. If he gives you the cold shoulder, bite down and keep away from him. Make him understand that your world does not revolve around him. Even if you don't feel that way inside. Over time, if he chooses to act like an idiot still, then it will b easier to get over him and move on. But if he comes back, he would do more to keep your attention. Make the moment yours, not his.
Good luck
2006-12-13 20:32:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may well be having problems that he cannot tell you about, sometimes people can't handle two strong emotional things at one time ( Family Prob and love for you )
All I can suggest is that you just hold back for a while go out with your friends to take your mind off things and remind him you are there for him. If after a few weeks you still haven't heard anything from him then just ask him outright where the relationship is going and if you still get a shady excuse then just tell him you are not waiting around and end it.
If he wants you he will know you are serious and if he doesn't stop you he was only using you and you deserve better than that!
Good luck with whatever you decide xx
2006-12-13 20:15:16 · answer #2 · answered by Peachy Girl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have become an obligation to him and he has turned away so you will get the message. Since you are not behaving like a person who can do without him, he is having to deal with the guilt of dropping you. Why don't you cut your losses and realize that you do NOT need that type of person in your life. True love is backed up with the proper action that speaks much louder than words. His actions deny the LOVE he professes. It will be hard at first, but why don't you admit the obvious and quit trying to manipulate him into coming back to you. You don't need this person. Let him go. Just smile and leave him alone. Get on with your life. You deserve better.
2006-12-13 17:50:48 · answer #3 · answered by PZ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say he avoids you at work? Its never a good idea to get involved with someone you work with because when things end there is awkwardness and the such. He may have viewed it as a fling and now feels its over and done with. You on the other hand feel its just going through a bad patch. He may have family problems and it would be nice to give him the benefit of the doubt but I feel its a lie. Sorry. You need to start asking yourself some tough questions such as can you continue to work there? Were you the first or have there been other affairs? Do you need to report him to someone at work? Please try to speak to a friend or family member who can give you some solid and sound advice and a shoulder to cry on. But after this never weep for a man again. They never weep for us!
2006-12-13 17:56:24 · answer #4 · answered by DeeDee 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Darling, as bad as it is to accept, he doesn't want to be with you and he's too much of a coward to tell you straight. Some men are like this and the only thing you can do is give yourself some time to grieve and get over him then once you have to try and find someone that will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
I know it's hard, believe me we've probably all been there at one time or another, but you will feel better with time and plenty of evenings with your female friends. Don't pester him because it won't help and it will just make you feel worse everytime he rejects you.
2006-12-13 17:49:18 · answer #5 · answered by KB 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is having family problems, so just give him a break. Since you mentioned that he still loves you, I assume that this is a serious relationship. This means you should leave him alone for a week or so and then try to talk to him to see what you can do to help. Try to go somewhere private where you can actually talk to him one on one. Hope this helps.
2006-12-13 17:49:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not at the same stage of 'in love with you' as you are. AND he is not ready to give you the love you need. Maybe he never will be. Can you afford to wait around and always come second to his family? Sounds like his family have a problem with you.
2006-12-13 19:47:10 · answer #7 · answered by Tertia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to approach him and ask him, tell him how you feel and explain that it's not fair stringing you along . You're feeling like you have already broken up with him but everyday its a fresh hurt, at least if you make him say what you know deep down anyway, you can begin to move on. Relationships break down everyday erverywhere and there's always one side that gets hurt. Maybe you should finish it, at least that way it will be your heart that hurts but not your pride !
2006-12-13 17:54:46 · answer #8 · answered by Jimmy H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he has met someone else and wants to see where it will go, but wants to keep you hanging on in case things don't work out. My advice would be talk to him and tell him you hope he gets his family problems corrected and you will give him all the space he needs, but you are going to date others while he finds himself. Let him contact you!
2006-12-13 17:56:07 · answer #9 · answered by Broadgonebiker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wish i knew how to answer-i have asked myself this same thing many a times...you know, i think the best thing for YOU is to let him go...at least for now...move on-and dont let him get to you...he doesn't sound worth it. If he doesn't have the balls to communicate to you the real issue and has to use a scape goat-than that only begets many of problems down the way anyway...consider it a blessing in desguise and take power in moving on...If it might make you feel better-and feel its worth it-express yourself and communicate to him...maybe write him, or call him and tell him you want to give him his space, but you are not going to be waiting on him to take his space much longer...if he wants it to go further he is gonna have to let you in that space- you dont deserve to be put on the back burner-and someone who deserves you isn't going to do that-or at least communicate and care for your feelings enough to let you know whats goin on...not even taking the risk in losing you.
best of luck
guys suck-but their actions speak what they are really trying to say...and there's not much more to it than that.
2006-12-13 17:53:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋