I am currently dating someone whom I have mixed feelings about and am not sure what to do?

Question

I have been seeing this girl for 2 months now and I enjoy spending time with her and we have a lot of fun. The problem is that she is sarcastic and can tend to be very negative and critical. She also is not very emotionally very healthy and has some issues she's dealing with. She is still not completely over her ex boyfriend who she was with for 3 years and has been broken up with for 6 months now. She tends to get very quiet at times and I feel as if though I have to be the one to make conversation sometimes otherwise its dead silence. She says she doesn't know right now how to feel about me because she doesn't want a relationship right now. I don't know wether to continue seeing her and see where it goes since I have nothing to lose, or let her go because of the red flags?

Answer 1

You want to see where it goes? Okay, picture this... you stay with her for a while longer. By then, you feel obligated, so you continue to stay. She gets pregnant. Now you really feel obligated to stay, plus you've subjected a helpless child to her negativity, her criticism, and her emotional roller coaster... You can probably fill in more details from there.

Dump this girl. She's not healthy enough for a strong relationship right now. And you should be looking for someone who is on equal footing with you, not someone who is broken.

Answer 2

I would suggest keeping the lines of communication open, and know that there is room to talk, even if it's just you starting the conversation. You need to make all these points, clear, to her, so she understands where you're coming from. Don't take on her garbage though, and feel obligated, in any way to 'fix her problems'. Just leave things as they are. You can be her 'friend' and let her know that you'll be there, for her, to hear her out, when she's ready to talk. Until that time, however, you should consider moving on with your life, as you have much to offer, and nothing to lose, if you walk away now.
Just remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea, and everything happens for a reason...this may be one of those experiences that allow you to see a relationship from one perspective. On the other hand, this may be a sign for you to find something better, and more stable. You know what you want, and you know that it's out there, waiting for you...but not in this relationship.

Answer 3

Alright my man...you have come to the right place. I have been in your position many a time and have learned my lessons. This is hard to hear, and even harder to do, but you have to let this one go. Trust me, it will only get worse.....you have to take a leap of faith here and just trust me on this one. Girls who show emotional issues that early on REALLY have emotional issues. She will portray these issues inwardly for the time being but over time they will be expressed outwardly towards you and the relationship. This will lead to countless fights where she makes no sense and you are left with nothing but frustration. As for the ex boyfriend thing, the fact that she is telling you she isn't over him is a huge red flag. Who knows if its true, but she will always compare your relationship with theirs and you will lose...trust me. Even if you are prince charming himself...this will end badly. Oh and lastly, you said you have nothing to lose?? Well....you have nothing to lose now, but the longer you stay in this the harder it is to get out. Your feelings for her will inevitably grow and you will be somewhat trapped. Get out before its too late. Just trust me my friend and good luck.

Answer 4

This little gal has allot of baggage and she is just out of a relationship so that can never be good --I always see people that are getting over one with another as not a very kind person to begin with--and as far as you having nothing to lose?? Why think so little of yourself?? You are putting effort into this and seems as tho she is on just for the ride to keep busy --I'd rethink all of this today!!