My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 and a half years. He loves me and I make him happy. The catch is this is a long distance relationship. His friends who have never met me and have barely talked to me have decided that they dont like me and that they want my boyfriend to go out with this other girl. My boyfriend could easily go out with this other girl "if he hadnt met me" He knows that for short term (like the next 6 months) she would be better for him because she lives near him and his friends want him to date her. although if he chose her he would lose me forever. he knows that my goals and aspirations are much more like his than hers are. He cant decide what he wants. His friends are pressuring him. He thinks that if he breaks up with me i will be a wreck forever. I keep telling him that he needs to follow his heart. He doesnt know what his heart is telling him. She could make him happy. Does anyone have any advice? I just want to help him. we are both in a lot of pain.
2006-12-13 15:46:51 · 19 answers · asked by zebraprntslinky 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
LOL....stupid girl! Since when does ones boyfriend have the luxury of deciding between two girls? Dump his sorry ***. You can do better.
2006-12-13 15:59:18 · answer #1 · answered by Tori 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate to this. I had a boyfriend that moved to a different state but we still stayed together. A long distance relationship is hard. But you dont need me to tell you that. Its good to know that he is thinking about this and that he really does care for you. Most guys would most likely say forget it about the long distance relationship and go for the other girl thats closer.I would say try to convince his friends that you arent a bad person. Talk to them more become friends with them. I know that may sound hard but believe me it will work. If you can get his friends on your side he wont have to make a decision between you and the other girl.As for your boyfriend keep doing what you guys are doing besides if you think about it six months isnt that long. And in know time you guys will be together and happy once more. Dont let this spoil your beautiful relationship. I have been in your shoes and what i told you i have personally done and it worked for me. I hope it does the same for you if you give it a chance. My best of luck to you! Just do what you think is right and nothing will go wrong. ^.^
2006-12-13 15:58:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm curious.. how old are you both?
A man MUST have his own principles to live by. If he said he loves you but can be confused/pressured to leave you to date another girl, does that sound like true love?? A man should be the head of the family, someone who can lead his family and not easily confused by peer pressure or any pressure. If he's like that now, how can you guarantee he will change after being a husband?? His life isn't directed by his friends. As a husband, his wife HAS TO be second after God. In this situation, it's like his friends are more important than you. It's not a good sign for you.
If I were you, I would leave him without any doubt. Better feeling the pain of losing him now than being in pain for the rest of your life in marriage. You can't rely on a man who doesn't even know what his heart tells him. Remember, he will be the father of your kids. Long distance relationship can work perfectly (been there, done that). It just requires complete trust, patience, self-control.
2006-12-13 16:11:03 · answer #3 · answered by bogey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely let him go. If he can't decide if he wants to be with you after spending that much time with you then you then he doesn't love you enough. Besides, a man that lets his friends influence the choices he makes for his life are too weak willed anyway. Do the both of you a favor and leave.
2006-12-13 15:51:33 · answer #4 · answered by Wicked 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.1 his friends are not real friends if they try to choose who he dates, if they truly cared then they would support him no matter who he dated. No.2 you should be thinking about if it is worth being with someone who doesn't know for sure they want to be with you? If he loved you he would say forget the other girl and be with you instead, without thinking twice about it.
2006-12-13 16:08:36 · answer #5 · answered by Wendy Kim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you love him, he loves you, find a way to be together, make it work, if it works for the long run good, if not at least you would know you both tried your best. Nothing is easy but maybe you have a simple answer that you cannot see because of the pain.
2006-12-13 15:52:00 · answer #6 · answered by Pandora 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF BOTH OF YOU ARE NOT SURE WHERE THIS IS GOING
THE DO THE RIGHT THING AND MOVE ON, THEN HE WONT
FEEL LIKE YOU WILL BE A WRECK IF HE LEAVE. IF AFTER
2 AND HALF YEAR HE DONT KNOW WHAT HE WANT THEN
YOU SHOULD LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU UNDERSTAND
AND THAT HE NEED TO BE WITH HER IF THAT WHAT
HE CHOSE. BUT THIS REALLY IS BETWEEN THE TWO
OF YOU AND NO ONE ELSE. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU WANT TO DO IN THIS MATTER. SO JUST DO.
2006-12-13 15:52:40 · answer #7 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you start dating other guys? The other girl will always be on his mind and you will also always wonder too. It can drive you crazy. If he has to think about it - tell him to take a hike. If he really loved you, this question should not even be thought of.
Good Luck and trade him in!!!
2006-12-13 15:49:47 · answer #8 · answered by STAR 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you need to search your heart and figure out which is right for you. the pain he is causing you or the pain the long distance relationship is causing you. for your sake i hope you choose not to be with him besides that how do you know for certain that he isnt already seeing/dating her with or without your permission. take care and good luck. happy holidays.
2006-12-13 15:50:19 · answer #9 · answered by sherryw_1978 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For one, I'm really sorry you have to go through this. You should tell his friends to back off, and give him his own will to think. As for you, you can just support him.
If you were a good girlfriend, you would be happy for him if he chose you or not.
(I'm not trying to sound harsh. Sorry if you are offended :) )
2006-12-13 15:49:59 · answer #10 · answered by Henry III 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋