I feel 'flat' and have done for years - 3 months ago i didnt stop crying for weeks and now I feel flat again

Question

i have stopped using all sorts of stuff, took time off work saw the Doc finally took some meds, counceling, im trying to learn about thought and behaviour to make myself feel (or believe better). But after my heavy weeks of real emotional downs i feel like i did before, just flat - I dont take illegal things now but have started drinking which now has to stop because that has started replacing my previous addictions. The problem is... i can see why i started this spiral in the first place. I love getting mashed - it just seems better than normal life, but i dont want it to be that way, i have everything going for me but i just want to muck it up... i think i love the melancholy and the dark, i pushed everyone away, is this just self pity? self destruction? how can i turn it round? - any advice?

Answer 1

Just take things a day at a time, and soon im sure you will feel better. Everyone goes through things like this, sometimes not for as long as you have. Just try proving to yourself that your strong enough to get through this, because an addiction is a sign weakness. Try something that will give you a natural high, maybe helping someone else that is worse off then you; sponser a child or help the homeless and needy because the best feeling another human being can get is the one you get from helping make a difference in the world. When ever you fell down go for a walk, think about all the good times in yourlife, all the good people, all the people who love you and want to help you.
When you feel down take a few deep breaths and...paint or draw your emotions and go from there; try drawing better emotions then the day or days before. Talk to those people you feel most comfertable with. Dont turn to a substance or liquid to make yourself feel better, it may work for that moment in time but in the long run its doing more harm then good. Watch a funny move; laughter is the best medicine. Get involved in a loving realationship (boyfriend or girlfriend). In the end it really comes down to you and how much you want to turn your life around, anything is possible and everyone diserves happiness. If you ever want to talk to me email me at [e-mail], ill write back and hopefully we can help each other.

Answer 2

I've been in that same position too. HIGH FIVE!!! Maybe for now you should just back off and give them some space. Statistically, they obviously wont last. It was really upsetting in my case, because the guy was really into me then he just went off of me for some other girl. But you'll be over it, i got over it within 2 weeks. I just said "ok fine. He doesnt want me, fair enough, i dont want him in that case." and kept saying that everytime i thought about him. I know you're probably thinking that it wont work for you, and thats what i thought. But it really worked. This is just something time will heal, and you're only in school so weve got a lifetime ahead for boys, right now we should just be happy that we have friends and that we're young :)

Answer 3

I used to be the same, I still am a bit. If everything is fine, I feel something is missing. I think you need to accept your feelings as they are, without trying to chnage them. I'm also drawn to melancholy & it's a stage you get through it. I got through it becos I felt my feelings of melnacholy & validated them. I listened to some music that resonated with my feelings & that helped me express them, that was very helpful. Find some music that expresses your feelings.
It is self-destructive behaviuor in a way but now that you've seen through it, you know what you're doing, you can change things.
lf you feel flat, don't fight it, just go with it, accept it.
Maybe when you cried, you were expressing/feeling your emotions & they were too painful & now you've numbed yourself again & thus are feeling flat? it's probably a defence mechanism.

you are welcome to email me if you need to chat!

Answer 4

Depression I gather.
In the last few years I have lost a lot of loved ones. my cousin died last year, a week before her 19 birthday. My cousin had so much going for her and sadly she died from a medical condition. My point is this When you feel depressed think of things you would like to do write a list of things you want to achieve and who you are doing it for.

Try that good luck and I hope thing's get better.

Answer 5

You need to analyse the separate issues in your life and pin point the route of it- because there will be one. Are you happy in your current job, relationship, body etc?
Try to also pinpoint the time when this started and what was going on in your life at that point.
Take up a new hobby or sport to get your mind focused on something other than drink. And smile :-)
Good luck xxx

Answer 6

There is help out there. I wish I could offer more info on that but I think you need some therapy. I'm not sure what counselling you sought but you obviously need something more. It sounds like depression to me but you need to get some real help. One book that helped me a little was Self Coaching. take care hope you feel better

Answer 7

I've felt "flat" before myself. I had to back to the Dr. to have my depression medications adjusted. Things and situations can change over time and sometimes an adustment is needed. Good luck - don't give up!

Answer 8

We are really screwed up aren`t we? Yes self destruction, I love getting hurt - I wish I had the answer to why we do it!!! Ive never been like this, I just dont know....

Answer 9

you suffer from concurrent disorders of addiction and depression...you already knew that...treat the addictions first...use a good in patient 28 day program, then deal with the depression...chronic depression that is unresponsive to meds might have good success with ECT(shock therapy)

Answer 10

please dont start drinking or you will never get right try going to some kind of place where you can have a chat and meet other people to talk to.drinking is not the answer i wish you all the best.anne