I am a single mother of one with my own house, my own car and a good job. Whenever I met a guy I fill a little weird because I do not know if they think that I will need him to help me or be a father figure or if they respect this fact that I can do good by myself? I was married since I was 18 and I am now 26 so this is the first time I have been alone so I do not know what to expect???
2006-12-13 08:06:38 · 29 answers · asked by stephanie c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think they're better than married women but not quite as desirable as a single woman without kids.
2006-12-13 08:08:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There might be a guy or two that feel that way but in general, most guys shouldn't feel that way towards you. I am sure it's just the way you feel because this is the first time you've been alone in a while. You shouldn't feel this way especially because you are career and financially independent.
Just in my opinion, I have a great respect and regard for single moms. It is so much more difficult to be one. To be able to manage a career, a livelihood, and bringing-up a child.
Just be proud of who you are darling. Only those guys that can understand and appreciate your value will eventually matter most to you. You shouldn't feel guilty to get into a relationship.
You deserve no less. How many 26 year olds can say they are well established in life, have a great career and life, and manage the responsibility of being a single mom??
If I were single and available, I'd love to date you for who you are :-)
2006-12-13 08:15:38 · answer #2 · answered by houstonian352000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 years ago I married a single mom. I admired what she was doing by raising her daughter who is now 12. She was making her own house payment, had her own car, and her own income and an ex husband that was always in court because of not paying his child support. I respect what she was doing on her own probably because I was a single dad. I raised my son from age 12 months to 18.
My best advice when it comes to dating, don't put expectations on the guy and don't feel you have expectations on you or that you have to act any certain way. Chances are, you'll date several times before you let a guy get close to you. Just be careful on who you let around your child.
2006-12-13 08:15:09 · answer #3 · answered by Big Rick 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are going to find a variety of men out there...from those who fear being involved with a woman who has children, to those who are very loving, accepting and supportive. The important thing is to be honest with them and not pursue the ones who can't handle the extra love. Also, be careful when introducing men to your child....it will confuse him if you bring home every guy you date. Wait until you are in a relationship that yu feel may actually go somewhere, you have taken the time to get to know the man and you feel comfortable bringing him home for a visit. Finally, NEVER put the love of a man over the love and needs of your child. I have been a single mom (I was one for 10 years) and I have had friends who were single moms....I have seen many of them get so lonely that they let the loneliness take over and lose good sense. They date guys who obviously don't want to be involved with the child, they spend more quality time with the man then their child....relationships will come & go, but the bond you have will your child is precious and will last forever...make sure that it is something your child can look back on with fondness when he has grown up and left home.
2006-12-13 08:14:12 · answer #4 · answered by nexgenjenith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
expect anything and everything. Depends on the guy. Some guys will respect you for being a single mom and some guys will think your just looking for a dad. Try not telling the guy for the first few dates and then throw that to him and see what happens. I was a single mom of three for @2 yrs. I now am married to a guy that loves my kids as much as me. He was married with one child so I think maybe he was just the 'Family type guy". You never know. keep your options open!!
Read your answers with 'thumbs up'. There's a lot of diverse good advise there! I especially agree with the one that says not to let the kid meet the guy until it's serious - GREAT advise there!!
2006-12-13 08:11:13 · answer #5 · answered by Scorpio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
More than likely you'll need to be looking in the over 30 category.... then again, I tell all my gal friends that.....because over 30 you'll have the "three-fer"....intelligence coupled with maturity, better job and their own life.....ie, ready for a family. Personally I love children and whenever I am dating a girl and they have a child(ren) the most important thing to me is that they're in shape... that is key, believe me. As a guy over 30 I am one to be extremely picky.....and what I respect is a girl that is going to be honest, up front and real. If that is the type of guy you want (up front, honest and real) then you had better be that way with him from the get go.....the ones you scare off, screw 'em, because which is more important? The happiness of the man you just met, or your child in the long run? Exactly. be good, be well, and email me if you wanna talk shop.... love, Jack
2006-12-13 08:11:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well I was a single mother( married now) and I do know exactly where you are coming from. First, think about what You want. I know you already came out of a relationship and marriage could be the last thing on your mind. I know you probably just want to meet someone to hang out with I don't know. But don't even worry about that. Find someone who has equal or more to you. don't go for someone w/o a career, car, home, because anyone w/o will want to take from you. but i also shows the one good man that you dont want to take from him, but that you independent. and Take your time.
2006-12-13 08:12:16 · answer #7 · answered by want-my-advice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, if I was you I wouldn't worry about it too much. Like you said you can handle it on your own so you don't "need" a man but you want to find a new partner to share all that you love and adore in life which I am sure your son is number 1 on that chart.So, just be proud of who and what you are and speak the truth to men you meet and tell them right off that you are a single mother.If they run then you saved yourself and your kid another heart ache.Any one that is truly interested will want to be with you and any part of your life that you hold dear.
2006-12-13 08:14:25 · answer #8 · answered by vmaxer85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mature men will not have a problem with it. However, I would expect that if you are dating men your age or younger, most are not ready for the responsibility of a child. Of course you should be looking for a good role model for your child. As a mother, you don't have the 'luxury' of fooling around with multiple guys in your home - you need to find someone who would be a good influence.
2006-12-13 08:11:01 · answer #9 · answered by duritzgirl4 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm a 23 year old (was) single mother of two. I was always forward with the guys I dated. I didn't let my kids meet the guys I dated, until things got serious. I found it didn't bother most guys, and by letting guys know my situation from the start, I didn't have to waste my time on the guys it did bother. Good luck....there is DEFINATLY still hope!!
2006-12-13 08:10:17 · answer #10 · answered by [un]bro/ken 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋