why is my baby father being such a jerk to me?

Question

im 15 weks pragnant and he told me to get lost in my 11th week and he change his phone number on me and he told me if i need him or anything to call his dad like im going to call his dad then i asked him for 400 hundred dollars bec he was going to give it to me when we were still together but he told me he has to see if the baby lives to b born befour he gives me anymoney and i miss him i keep trying to get him to go back out with me though email but he just tell me i need help to get it im scared that he will git my baby after he or she is born what do i do do u think i should give him time and write him and see if he want me back or should i just give up please dont tell me to give up bec i dont want to i still love him will i get past this or should i keep trying to get him to go back out with me he might already have a gf dont know he tell me to get help he think im bipolar and i dont think i am i think i just have anger problems but i dont know where to find a group

I'm 20 years old turning 21 in feb

Answer 1

i know you won't like to hear this, but i'm dead serious. don't get back with this boy! he is making a fool out of you! you don't want to be with some one who would just abandon you and the baby like that. girl, he's not worth your tears. you'll be going through stuff like this for years if you stay. if you let him get close emotionally to the baby, he will just hurt it by doing this same thing to it. i want you to know i talk from experience. my sons dad abandoned me in an apartment with no income when my son was 3 months old. as for him getting the baby when it's born, work on getting yourself a good home with family then talk to a social worker about keeping him away from the baby. the social worker will point you in the right direction. you are lucky because you still have plenty of time to get this straightened out. also, go to your local welfare office and they will give you and the baby excellent insurance and financial help. i wish you the best of luck!!!

Answer 2

Although this guy doesn't seem to be doing right by you, I am more concerned about your actions and attitude. If this guy is treating you this way, you need to step away from the realtionship and worry about yourself and the child you are about to bring into the world. He has sent you very clear signals that he is not interested in having a relationship and so it is time to move on (sorry, I know you don't want to hear that, but it is better to live with the truth than be deceived by a lie). No woman should feel draw to or compelled to chase after a man who mistreats her or doesn't want her....this is not love, it is co-dependant and very unhealthy.

Go for child support once the baby is born, as it is his responsibility to help you care for this child. However, make plans to raise your child by yourself. Take parenting classes, go to a lamaza class, start setting up a place for your baby in your home. If you are afraid that he may try and remove the child from your custody, you should be spending your time and energy on insuring that he can't. Make sure that your child will be coming home to a safe and loving environment. If you do have any problems or a possible mental health issue, you need to get help for it now.....a baby, no matter how much you love it, can (unknowingly and unintentially) push your buttons, stress you out and wear you down....every parent who is honest will tell you that there have been times they have been frustrated and there are times they have been angry. It's ok and normal to feel that way sometimes, but if you have an anger control issue you might not be able to keep yourself from hurting your child. Seek help for this now! Also, if there is any chance that you are bipolar, this is a very serious medical condition and you should get treatment for it immediately. If it comes down to a court battle over custody of your baby, a judge could order a mental health evaluation. If it is determined that you do suffer from untreated bipolar disorder or have an anger control problem, the judge very well may rule that it is in the child's best interest (that is the only thing the judge is concerned about) to remove him from your care. However, if you seek treatment and therapy now, it shows a proactive and responsible approach on your part and a judge reviewing your case will see the actions you have taken and may consider you less of a danger.

If you have made the decision to bring this child into the world, you must start to put your wants after your childs needs....this will be your job and your life from now on....you can start by giving this baby a healthy and loving mommy who is not obsessive about resuming a relationship that died a month ago. Your heart will heal from a failed relationship, but the love for your child will go on forever.

Answer 3

Ok - there is no way to find out for sure who the father is until after the child is born. That's your answer plain and simple. I am not sure if that is what you are really asking here though...I think you need to get into some grief counseling and sort out all of these unresolved emotions concerning Roger's death and your reactions. Maybe you will come to realize that it doesn't matter who the father is. Sure things may get a little messy, but a healthy baby is truly a gift - even in the most unfortunate (and unintended) circumstances. Then again, maybe you will realize that emotionally you are not ready to have another child, making abortion an option. Either way - see a counselor, you need to talk this through with someone.

Answer 4

Okay not trying to be mean but how old are you? and not only that but you sound like you are whineing about something that is already over! You need to grow up and start learning how to be a mother, if the father is not going to be around then you are going to have to step up to the plate, remember he may have gotten into bed with you but you spread your legs just the same!!!! Do you have a job? Do you have a place to raise your child? Do you even know how to take care of a baby? I think that these are questions that you should be more concerned about then getting the POS boyfriend back!!!!! Best of Luck to your CHILD!

Answer 5

It's sad to say but you are the one pregnant and you will have to go on with your life. Because you want to deliver a healthy baby and you need to be concern about your health as well. Okay so you can't get money from him now but when the baby gets here you can do child support. He doesn't have the skills to diagnose you that's not left up to him. Don't contact him anymore, I know it will be hard but don't do it. This is why it's always best to use protection every time you have sex no matter how much you think he loves you or you love him. Let this be a lesson to you. People are not always who you think they are.

Answer 6

It sounds like he is being who he is. There's no need to take it personally.

Did you plan to get pregnant? Did the two of you agree to having a baby? Was the pregnancy an accident? Or an attempt to keep your boyfriend in your life?

This whole situation is unhealthy. You need help. Your health and the baby's health are most important, not whether or not you get back with your boyfriend. If you are in school, call a counselor or go to social services and explain your situation. There is help available, you are just looking to the wrong person for it.

Answer 7

HUH!THEY DIDN'T TELL YOU THAT IT WILL BE DAYS LIKE THIS..
HE GOT WHAT HE WANT FROM YOU.. NOW HE'S ON WITH THE NEXT GIRL.. YOU COULD NT SEE THAT AT FIRST HUH?
AND YOU ALLOW HIM TO TREAT YOU LIKE THIS..
HE DON'T WANT YOU BABY YOU HAVE NT GOT THE POINT.. GO ON AND LIVE YOU LIFE AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR BABY .... YOU CAN DO IT WE ALL HAVE BEEN A SINGLE PARENT .. AND STILL WE ARE MAKING IT HAPPEN FOR OUR KIDS...GIVE UP THAT ZERO..
HE'S PLAYING MIND GAMES WITH YOU SWEETY..
YOU WASN'T ILL WHEN HE LAID DOWN AND ME THAT BABY WAS YOU? YOU DON'T HAVE A ANGRY PROBLEM... YOU NEED A REALITY CHECK.....THAT WILL CURE ALL YOUR PROBLEM... THE WORLD DON'T CENTER AROUND YOU.. YOU CANT AWAYS HAVE IT YOUR WAY... REMEMBER THAT.....GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER AND GET READY FOR THAT BLESSING YOU'RE ABOUT TO HAVE.. GOOD LUCK AND HANG ON IN THERE...

Answer 8

I went through the same thing but I wouldn't allow myself to get upset. I didn't want to hurt my baby. Think about the baby and not that man. Trust me you'll see him after you have that baby. It's not easy but you have to keep your cool. My son is 18 months and his father don't want to have anything to do with him but he want to keep me around and that's impossible. The main thing is that I kept my composer and when ever he wants to see him son I take him over to his house. Be cool and think before you react. You are not living for only you anymore.

Answer 9

You sound young. You need to be seeking out family at this point. You are dealing with a immature boy as you are probably young yourself. You can't force someone to be with you if they don't want to. He is probably young and frightened of father hood. Let him be and he matures he will hopefully understand the importance of being a father to his child. However, again its not going to be you who forces him to realize this. Leave him alone and save yourself some stress. You need all your energy for you and your soon to be newborn child.

Answer 10

Forget him. He sounds like an ***.

He is probably scared of the repsonsability. Just ignore him, and let him know what it feels like. He will most likely come around.

Let me know if you need anything, alright? Good luck.