i was in a violent relationship in which i had a baby boy which is now 2 years old i kept getting back with my x which he would beat me and threaten 2 kill my son and all my family 2go with it he also was very controlling and manipulative,he is taking me 2 court so he can get contact should i let him help me can i really trust him alone with my baby????????
just to let u no i am no longer with my ex and do not have any contact with him at all at present
2006-12-13 05:55:44 · 22 answers · asked by sexy girl 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This guy is a nutter, never let your son near him! Your child's safety should come first!
2006-12-13 05:58:46 · answer #1 · answered by Cass 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgoodness sake, if you have no contact with your ex, leave it that way. Do not call him. Change your number. Once violent, always violent. Your duty is to protect your child and there is no way in the world I would let any violent person look after my child, even if it is half his. Its totally irresponsible of you as a mother, to allow your precious son's life be in the hands of this dangerous person. Don't let him talk to you. Let him try to take you to court, don't be afriad. The courts can see through people like him especially if he has a police record. You must protect your child at all costs. Never leave your son alone with him until he gets the courts permission and also proves he has undergone anger management and if he has an alcohol or drug problem, rehabilitaiton. It is up to you to look after the welfare of the little one AND YOURSELF. Move if you can.
2006-12-13 07:03:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off NO, NO, NO!!! IF he has beaten you and threatened to kill your two year old, it is safe to say you can't trust him. You need to make it clear to the court that he is an abuser and that he has threatened the child's life before. I'd start with a restraining order to keep him away from the child and you and get some free legal services help if you can't afford a lawyer.
The important part in all of this is to keep your son and yourself safe. IT is obvious you don't love the side of your x that beats you and therefore he wasn't truthful about who he was and you need to stop sympathisizing with him.
2006-12-13 06:22:27 · answer #3 · answered by espressoaddict22 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a similiar thing happen with my childs father, when i eventually left him , he really did try to kill me.
I decided that he was a nutJob but still agreed to let him see our son(under supervision only) , eventually he started seeing our boy less and less and is now totally out of picture. Ask for child support while he is allowed supervised visitation, and when he stops coming(which he probably will , stop asking for child support , this will eventually erase him from the picture for good.
Never leave your child with him alone , chances are he will abduct him(only to get back at you , not cos he actually cares for child)or worse.Get a lawyer if nessacarry to negotiate terms and to convince Judge that this man is a danger to his child.
2006-12-13 06:11:01 · answer #4 · answered by TakeNoticeNow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is going through this with a crazy x and the court is mean they will make you do it,I sure hope you have the proof you need write it all down keep all records for court and fight and fight some more my son has to do as the court Say's even with her saying she wants to kill her self and her son's the courts really don't care get a good lawyer
2006-12-13 11:33:53 · answer #5 · answered by helen l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's very important for every child to have male influence through out their life but NOT if it's at any threat to their own safety, or yours for that matter.
A child is the greatest gift anyone can get and he just doesn't deserve it.It's great that your not still in a relationship with that monster and in my opinion the farther you and your son are away from him the better.
2006-12-13 06:17:05 · answer #6 · answered by established1922 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What if it goes wrong letting your x have,supervised or unsupervised access to your little boy,leave it to the courts who will want a full background check on you both,police reports if there were any would be used also at the hearing,plus a very personal in depth report by social services,then they will reach there decision,its not all cut and dry
2006-12-13 06:08:05 · answer #7 · answered by barnowl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children need both parents in their lives. However, if he has a violent past you could ask for supervised visitation. Make sure it is in your favor though. Like visitation at your house or your parents' house where you have a male lookin over you and your son(father,brother etc) so if he tries anything, HE"LL get bopped!
2006-12-13 12:58:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no child should b kept away from there dad..wotever the circumstances sorry!!id agree to supervised visits only on neutral ground..my brother hasnt seen his kids for nearly 5 years now and thats not through choice..your son will no something is wrong even at this young age and not having his dad round will affect him in the future and he will resent you for it ..plz consider supervised visits dont stop ur ex seeing his child u will regret it in the long run and its not u suffering at the minute,the only victim in all this is your child n u have to do wot is rite for him now and wot will b rite and beneficial for him in the future..and im sorry to say but that is to b able to c his dad dont do it for you do it 4 ur little boy....good luckxx
2006-12-13 08:23:16 · answer #9 · answered by greyhound mummy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's as dangerous as you make out, he should only see his son under the supervision of a social worker. Otherwise, it will just be too stressful for the child.
2006-12-13 06:02:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋