I met my boyfriend 4 months ago, he was my first - if you know what I mean, we are also living together since that night. We were so in love - but soon I realised that he wasnt who I thought he was - he drinks alot, and sometimes he can get pretty aggressive! He passed out one night and I decided to go out with a friend, we got really drunk and I cheated with someone else (only kissed)!! That happened almost 4 months ago, we are still together though, but we fight about it all the time. Ive asked him to stop the drinking - but it still hasnt!! How do I walk away if im in the UK all by myself? I really do love him, but I`m worth much more than this!! But I cant get away, I just cant and nobody understands - they think its so easy, does anybody understand?
2006-12-13 04:58:04 · 17 answers · asked by Immortal 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm in more or less the exact situation only that I left London 6 months ago to be in Paris with this guy.
It hurts like hell knowing that I'm being under-valued but that doesn't stop the love and affection that I feel for him and the sweeping under the carpet every time he gets agressive with me.....
There will come a time when we will eventually say "Stop....enough is enough!" and walk away but it isn't that easy, is it ?
Perhaps when that day comes the guy will realise what a little patient gem he had on his hands tolerating the disrespect we have accepted.
I completely understand what you are going through !
2006-12-13 05:57:53 · answer #1 · answered by papillon_model 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm trying hard to understand, but I'm really don't.
I can't work out whether your problem is emotional (you think you love him too much too leave), or practical (you are living in his house and have no money other than what he gives you).
You say you are in the UK all by yourself. I don't know what you mean by that. Maybe you are a recent immigrant?
You need to make up your mind whether you want to stay with this man or not. He is not going to change. So you either have to put up with him the way he is or leave him.
Leaving might seem like a terrible option, but surely you've at least got a friend who'd let you sleep on their sofa till you found somewhere to live?
I'm sorry this is vague. But as I said, I don't know what the real problem is here.
2006-12-13 05:09:40 · answer #2 · answered by mcfifi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You started kissing someone else just after you met your 'first' ?? Is that a possible indication of how you really feel? Just because you are alone in a foreign country dosen't mean you have to settle. You've made the bold move to go there you probably have what it takes to live on your own.
2006-12-13 05:09:14 · answer #3 · answered by RF Ace Face 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Check in the paper for people looking for roomates. Or maybe you could call home and ask for help. It's just that simple. He's an alcoholic, and you've already cheated on him. Obviously it's not going anywhere. Btw discovering that your boyfriend has faults (like everyone does) is no excuse to cheat on him! If you're unhappy, leave.
2006-12-13 05:04:42 · answer #4 · answered by ♪ ♫Jin_Jur♫ ♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand you must stay stroung you should contact some family or friends and leave before it is to late also when you do leave tell him you will only come back if he stops drinking plus you are right every girl is worth more than their man treats them
Stay Stroung and don't give up on him if you do love him if not then don't come back think about it
2006-12-13 05:03:32 · answer #5 · answered by sexy_happy_gurl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not easy: no one ever said it had to be easy. You still have to do it, even if it means leaving the UK. This guy sounds like an abusive ars*hole & you deserve better.
Unfortunately, if he doesn't get hit by a bus tomorrow you are the one who must do what must be done. Good luck, hon.
2006-12-13 05:03:47 · answer #6 · answered by Well, said Alberto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I surely understand.
But baby girl that 4 letter word call love can really cause pain sometimes.
I know what i'm talking about because it's because of love that you can't do what you know you should. You know you deserve better but still theres that big but.
i really wanted to say more but it would maybe take me all day to really get into it. But for sure i understand that its hard.
good luck in whatever you decide.
merry christmas
2006-12-13 05:28:39 · answer #7 · answered by beautiful 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have already made up your mind. You don't need confirmation from us. If you know there is no future with this guy then you know what you have to do. If you are willing to put up with him then stay with him. Just because he was your first does not mean you have to stay with him.
2006-12-13 05:03:47 · answer #8 · answered by *Cara* 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no it's never easy to leave someone whom you have strong feelings for, but you have to go out on the limb & leave. even if it means that you're going to be alone. it's better to be alone & happy than in a relationship unhappy.
Good Luck
2006-12-13 05:02:06 · answer #9 · answered by missbronzebeauty09 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you started living together the first night you met? sheesh get away from there
2006-12-13 05:02:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋