I moved across country a few years ago with my cousin/roommate. We were very close as children, but as adults we hardly knew each other. From the start there were problems. I know I can be set in my ways so I agreed to be patient with the situation under the belief that things would get better.
Well, things never got better, they got progressively worse. I am now to the point where I actually can not stand the sight of her. She is loud, rude, filthy, irresponsible (especially when it comes to money & paying the bills on time) and a bigot. She is ethnic herself yet she harbors these classist opinions about other people of various race and education that makes her seem like a black David Duke. I find some of her comments disgusting which is why I barely talk to her.
I want to leave but I somewhat feel pressure to stay. Knowing how careless she is I feel like if I am not around she will end up homeless and our family will blame me. I don't want to cause more friction. Help!
2006-12-13 04:54:22 · 7 answers · asked by coca_chupa 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Here is something to try... treat the roommate situation like a business arrangement. You have to mentally sike yourself up to be able to look at your cousin in a different light. Remember, you are only responsible for YOURSELF and not others. Don't take on any stress that is not needed and allow yourself the opportunity to explore other options. Look into other roommate options, get involved in some community activities that will distract you from the madness going on in your apartment.
Stay focused and remember to honor your needs. Family is important, but remember that as an individual... YOU are important also.
Be Blessed.
2006-12-13 05:10:46 · answer #1 · answered by TracyBee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not your job to save her. If you can't afford it, keep saving your money and do what you can to put up with her while you have to. Try to spend time away from the apartment (I know this sucks, but it can cut down on stress.) Also see if you have a friend or boyfriend where you can sleep over sometimes. It will be like having a mini-vacation from the apt. Then as soon as you have the money start looking for another roommate situation and interview the people really thoroughly about their beliefs and habits.
2006-12-13 13:07:12 · answer #2 · answered by braennvin2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She isn't your responsibility. You need to get on with your life and leave her behind. Write her a letter, and tell her in the nicest terms that you have grown apart and you would like to live apart. "It's not you, it's me". Don't bring up any of her bad behaviors, that way if she show's the letter to family, you are in the best light. If she can't run her life without you, it will be apparent to all, that she is the only one to blame. You might want to suggest that she return to her family, to lessen the guilt.
2006-12-13 13:05:11 · answer #3 · answered by ankle biter tamer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to do what is best for you. She is an adult and if she chooses to not pay bills and ends up homeless that is her fault, you have to make yourself happy, you cant always worry about her, you have your own life to create.
2006-12-13 13:07:06 · answer #4 · answered by Dolphin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find you a hot man to move in with.
2006-12-13 12:57:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
come live with me
2006-12-13 12:58:02 · answer #6 · answered by suze_hall21 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you leave she will sink but if you stay you both will sink.
2006-12-13 13:01:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋