I need to break up with this guys GENTLY. I've been back and forth with him and I'm ready to call it quits for good! I've tried to break up w/him before BUT to no avail. I shut down in a siutuation like that and am close lipped, I hate hurting people's feelings. so I would rather for the guy just go away. I'm good at avoiding phone calls but I don't think this man will let that happen. I want to break up w/him today. NEED HELP
2006-12-13 04:53:58 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell him that another girl likes him and that you don't want to stand in his way.
You tell the you really like but love is out of the picture and you want happiness for him and it can't be from you.
2006-12-13 04:58:50 · answer #1 · answered by Elizabeth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoiding phone calls and hoping he will just go away is SOOO much more hurtful then just being straight forward with the guy. If you are only meant to be with one guy for the rest of your life and this guy is not the one, that is OK! That is what dating is all about, figuring out what you are looking for and finding that one guy.
Now that you know he is not the one, you are waisting both his time and your own. It doesn't really matter how you go about doing it. It's best to tell him in person, but if you really want to wuss out, text message him. At least that's better then avoiding him. :)
Overall, you are hurting him more by waisting his time and avoiding him then you would by being honest with him and breaking up with him. Good Luck!
2006-12-13 13:00:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Avoid the phone calls, which will make him suspicious you are breaking up with him. Then meet with him and tell him in less than 30 words. "I can no longer be your girlfriend. I know this is hurting your feelings. I feel I have been wrong to prolong things like I have. I am sorry." Don't give the we-can-still-be-friends stuff. Then get up and walk away.
2006-12-13 13:04:04 · answer #3 · answered by jackbutler5555 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey...I know what you're feeling! Here's something helpful - write down on a sheet of paper all the reasons for your wanting to break up. That way, if you do it by phone or even if it's in person, you have all the reasons clear in your mind, and that's reassuring. Next, I'd also suggest that you let this guy know that it's for good - something like, 'I really love you but I KNOW that you are ultimately not the one for me, I cannot see us spending our life together.' That way, he doesn't spend the next six months hoping you might come back again. It is sooooo hard to do, though, but mostly, you have to tell yourself that you have one life to live and you can't sacrafice it to make someone else happy. It's scary but sooner or later you have to take a leap of faith! Good luck!
2006-12-13 12:59:23 · answer #4 · answered by Cecilia28 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just simply tell him you think it's time to call it quits for good. Both of you have tried to make it work several times and you feel that it is not working for you. You want happiness in your life as well as his and you feel that neither one of you can experience that if you stay together. If you want to remain friends maybe you could say that you feel that both of you would be better off as friends rather than b/f and g/f. Hope this helps Good Luck
2006-12-13 13:00:28 · answer #5 · answered by Chynna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you shouldn't avoid him. That's what I hate about guys when they want to break up and don't have the guts to do it. They just avoid you. You call, they don't answer. You look for them, you cant find them. Until one day you just give up and when he sees you he doesn't talk to you he just ignores you. I think you should tell him in his face if you want to break up with him. DO NOT BREAK UP IN A LETTER OR PHONE!!!!! NEVER DO THAT!!!! Its like you don't have the guts to do it. Tell him that its not working out, that you need time to think of how you feel about him, tell him that your in a season that all your feeling are mest up. That you really need time. Well good luck. Hope things work out.
2006-12-13 13:06:18 · answer #6 · answered by jade_lz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here are a some suggestions:
1. Explain to him why this relationship must end
2. Let him know how much you care about his feelings
3. Think of this a new beginning of a friendship
4. Try to stay calm and relaxed
5. Listen to what he has to say
6. Weigh the pros and cons of your relationship
If those don't help, than act like you have completely lost your mind!! (LOL)
Start demanding stuff from him you know he can't fulfill!
say you're a lesbian!
2006-12-13 13:04:08 · answer #7 · answered by da realest 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can write him a note or an email or you can tell him to listen to "Sail On" by The Commadores saying to really listen to the song or just send him a text message saying I'm sorry but I really need some time to myself for reflexation and you are holding me back. Hopefully we can be together somewhere down the line. Hope that helped a little.
2006-12-13 12:57:56 · answer #8 · answered by The Plague 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be really direct. Say something like "Listen, I'm really sorry but this is not going to work out and I'm not going to change my mind." That leaves no room for argument and gets the point across.
Sometimes, being direct is the only way to be nice. Don't be ugly about it, but don't give him false hope either.
2006-12-13 12:57:14 · answer #9 · answered by Stacey K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him..."i need to tell you something,and i don't want you to say anything.and i don't want you to ask any questions.okay?... I don't think its working out, and it's not fair for either of us to be in a relationship where we don't feel the same for eachother so in the best interest of us both it's over.
(say something else if you want or just hang up.)
don't say anything like "can we be friends" or something else that could give him hope because he won't let go.
2006-12-13 12:59:45 · answer #10 · answered by atldutchess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋