Me and my well now ex-boyfriend recently broke up to go on a break and he was only prepared to wait two weeks so today was two weeks and both our friends don't want us to go out with each other so I tried to explain that maybe it would be best if we didnt go out etc. He got upset and he said he would be friends and I've tried to be friendly but he's shutting me out and pushed me away. I tried to give him a friendly hug goodbye and he told me that I'd rejected him and now seems like he doesn't want my friendship. Am I a horrible person and why is he acting like this?
2006-12-13 04:18:54 · 54 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No your not..he's just not over you yet.
2006-12-13 04:20:33 · answer #1 · answered by Amber B 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You are not a horrible person, as it seems the decision to break up was a mutual decision at first. But, it appears as if your ex developed hard feelings after the fact and is indeed feeling rejected as he stated. Hopefully he will come around eventually and you can be friends.
The one thing that did bother me with your question though, is that you said the reason you both decided to not get back together was because both your sets of friends did not want you to. A relationship is not about what your friends want you to do, but it is about the way people feel about each other. Don't take this wrong, but I am assuming you might be quite young. If this is the case, as you get older you will come to realize the opinions of your friends are not all that important in making decisions about your relationships. Of course friends are important, but there are some things that should be a personal decision.
2006-12-13 04:27:22 · answer #2 · answered by Janine E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is acting that why, Maybe, because, it is more than just rejection he is filling . My be deep down he loves you.
How old are you ,by the way? AND why did you brake up any way. Think about your reasons .How do you really feel about him.
You mite of done what is right and by be not .If he was with other girls when you were apart ,or together ,my be it was the right thing to do. Was there any cheating going on ,on his part? Were you cheating ? Cheating is horribly wrong of anyone to do.
NO your not a horrible person. for breaking up.But he had to been thing about breaking up for good ,if you had took a 2 week break from one anther. Was it your idea ,or his, or both of yours . That is all I can say since I 'm not there to see what is going on. I hope this is any help too you . Good luck , I hope you 2 can be friends!!
2006-12-13 04:44:01 · answer #3 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably feels hurt that after you both set a time where you would be apart and then get back together... you just decided to end it. It most likely threw him for a loop. He may think that you wanted to beak up in the first place and the break between you two was just a set up so you could tell him it is over. He still wants to be close to you, hence being friends, but is still hurt at your actions toward him. Why did you follow what your friends say? That might have hurt him also, giving him the idea that your relationship was so unstable that you would follow what your friends told you instead of doing what you think you should have done. I hope it all works out for you two in the end.
2006-12-13 04:29:47 · answer #4 · answered by Jenjen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont worry about this i dont think youre a horrible person, at least not just from what youve written here. if you didnt want to be with him anymore thats fine and its much better that you were honest with him than just stay with him. he probably needs space after the breakup because it hurts him to be around you because he still has feelings for you. leave him alone for a while (maybe a couple of weeks? i dont know how long it will take him to get over you) and then be nice and sensitive towards him. dont push him into being friends with you. did you definitely want to break up with him then? the only reason you gave was that your friends didnt want you to go out. that would be a silly reason. anyway, youre not a bad person so dont be upset and try to relax! spend some time with your friends :) hope that helps
2006-12-13 04:25:04 · answer #5 · answered by john9999999 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just told him you didn't want a relationship...give him some space. Pushing you away is merely his pride.Remember that you have just rejected him, so allow him some time to deal with that. Your more than likely not a horrible person,you have a conscience...otherwise you wouldn't have typed your question, but you have told him that you don't want anything to happen between you...stick to what you've said otherwise you will confuse and upset him more. Remember also that at the end of the day,its up to you who you have relationships with and not your friends....allow you and your ex some space and time....you might find out that you just can't be apart. Goodluck
2006-12-13 04:30:17 · answer #6 · answered by yupthatsright! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Someone always get hurt during a break up, and that is what this is....a break up. He's hurt, and you probably won't be able to be friends. Rarely does it work out that way, although we all wish it could. But it's very hard to do, so don't count on it. Give me some space and stay away. If things are meant to be with you two, they will work out, and if not, then not. You aren't a terrible person for wanting to break up. This is your life, and you should do what you want to do. You tried to be nice about the break up, and that is good. Give him some time.
2006-12-13 04:22:24 · answer #7 · answered by nottashygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever feel bad if a boy does that (unless you are sure you love him and want him back forever). He is just sad, that'll be over soon. Give him a bit of time and then talk. Let him know you want to be friend and not more than that.
You aren't a horrible person. You do think a lot about what other persons might feel. That's OK. Lighten up a bit!
2006-12-13 04:27:05 · answer #8 · answered by dodo_loui 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, don't worry about what your friends think, you should decide for yourself whether or not you want to be in the relationship.
He's been rejected and is behaving the way many young men would behave.
Think hard about what YOU want without worrying about your friends input. Then be really honest with him about your feelings. That's the best you can do.
You aren't being a horrible person. This is real life where we are constantly making choices that affect us and others.
2006-12-13 04:23:47 · answer #9 · answered by heart o' gold 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not a horrible person. Your "friend" is the horrible person. Drop the loser. He's not even your friend.
The only reason why you would be friends with someone is because you enjoy their company. If you want to make yourself feel bad by hanging out with this killjoy, then by all means, go ahead.
Open your eyes and wake up. It's not possible to have a friendship with a past boyfriend.
2006-12-13 04:22:42 · answer #10 · answered by Sax M 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've learned that I can't be friends with a former bf - at least not right away, if ever. There's no such thing as a "friendly hug" with an old bf.
No, you're not horrible, but you are expecting miracles if you think you can be "just friends" with him. He feels rejected as a man and as a bf.
2006-12-13 04:23:57 · answer #11 · answered by masha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋