We have not been close all my life. We are in a good peacful place, but I don't feel close to her yet I love her.
2006-12-13 04:12:02 · 19 answers · asked by wildblackflower 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
When you have been hurt by a parent during your childhood years that's a devastating ordeal. It's not that you hate them or nothing like that. It's love but not the love you wanted for you and your mom. Believe me I know exactly how you feel and I don't even need to know the situation. Because I am the situation. I been through so much with my parents you wouldn't believe the cr*p I been through. I forgave them, then slowly with time I started back going around my Mom and now I live with her. Not because I can't afford my own place but to help her. But to this day I really don't have much to say to my Father, I realize he was a sick man to do what he did to me. Get this he's only five minutes away from where I stay with my Mom. Oh Well!!!!!!!!!
So, whatever you decided how deal to with your Mom that's your business. Didn't nobody walk in your shoes but you.
Personally, I don't think you're doing anything wrong. What you are doing, it's called "progress". They say,"Time will heal all pain".
Take that any way you want to that last phrase.
Peace, Keep Your Head Up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-13 04:39:21 · answer #1 · answered by Gail S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can fully understand where you are coming from. I loved my mom, but we weren't super close. She passed away, and even though she is gone, which makes me sad, I am realistic about what our relationship was. She wasn't the easiest person in the world to get close to. Sometimes there are just people out there like that, emotionally guarded.
You shouldn't feel guilty about that. Sounds like you've kept the lines of communication open between the two of you. That's super on your part.
One day things may change, and you'll find yourself feeling much closer to your mom. If not, at least you're not shutting her out of your life, which some people would do in your situation.
I'm pulling for you. Happy Holidays!
Blessings,
JustanAngel
2006-12-13 12:16:32 · answer #2 · answered by justanangel 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say if you are not really close that once or twice a month would be OK.
Being a mom I would be hurt if I didn't hear from my daughter at least that much.
It also depends on how long you have lived away from her. If you have just moved it you might want to make it a little more often. Mom's are funny about their children just moving out and not hearing from them at all for weeks.
Congrats on being on your own just don't forget where you came from.
2006-12-13 12:15:54 · answer #3 · answered by Sally V 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that it is perfectly fine if you an your mother have always been that way. Some people have different relationships with their parents. I call my mom every day, but it was not always like that. I lost my dad ten years ago and now I keep very close with my mom, but like I said everyone is different. If it bothers you try and make more of an effort to call or send a card
2006-12-13 12:16:05 · answer #4 · answered by angelahawthorne@sbcglobal.net 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I make the effort to call my Mom weekly. We're not that close either, but my calling makes her happy and it doesn't take much effort on my part. Someday, when my Mom is gone, I'll be glad I took the time to keep in touch with her.
2006-12-13 12:25:01 · answer #5 · answered by kja63 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you should communicate to her that you want to know her better. Finding time to visit can be hard but keep up with the phone calls or write letters. I never got a chance to really know my mother. She died when I was 17. It made me realize that time is precious and you should be more proactive in your relationships with people you love and care about. You never know when they will be gone from you forever. Good luck!
2006-12-13 12:18:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do the same thing - there's nothing wrong with it.
It all depends on your relationship with her. Some have a really close relationship with their moms, and some (like us) don't.
2006-12-13 12:13:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I haven't seen my mom in about 3 years. I love her to death but she lives kind of far away and I am busy. The best families don't see each other all the time.
2006-12-13 12:15:14 · answer #8 · answered by ghostpirate7 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I don't think it's wrong. We all have to find our comfortable place in the relationships that we are "stuck with" as oppposed to the relationships that we choose.
I'd talk to my mom a lot less than that if I could get away with it.
2006-12-13 12:15:43 · answer #9 · answered by heart o' gold 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
She understands that you are busy...Does she call you? That's nice that you call her. That's the only mother that you have so try to call her even more. Even when you just think of her or when someone talks about their mother. Call her or send her a card...Oh and also, try to send her flowers now so that she can smell and enjoy them b4 it's too late.
2006-12-13 12:16:13 · answer #10 · answered by angelic1302 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋