Complicated story.. about 2 years ago, I started working with this girl named Sarah who is really sweet and pretty but she's not the most confident person in the world. I was just getting over a long relationship when I met her, but her and I are very compatible. One of our co-workers kept asking me if I thought Sarah was pretty or if I'd go out with her. Also some of my other co-workers claimed she was checking me out. I never pursued her and started dating my current GF shortly after that.
Well we all started hanging out after work, Sarah met my current GF and they are now good friends. Sarah doesn't work with me anymore, but when we all hang out (2,3 times a month) she always gives me some kind of compliment (says I look nice, says I have nice eyes, etc.)
I am basicially torn. I know I'm in a relationship but I think about Sarah a lot. I keep thinking what would of happened if I would have pursued her.
I love my GF now, but this is driving me nuts. Help!
2006-12-13 02:24:00 · 8 answers · asked by Craig M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, it will probably keep driving you nuts. All girls know the cardinal rule of not dating your friends boy friend. So with that said, you said that your current gf and Sarah are now good friends. Sarah would not betray her friend by pursuing you, at not if she is a true friend. You will probably never know what would have happened. You can only know the outcome of things that are happening now. Stop dwelling on something that you can't figure out...see, it's already driving you nuts. Focus on something more importatn, like your current gf. If she isn't what you want then let her go.
2006-12-13 02:28:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When the pheromones hit its hard to ignore them. You may just have that kind of thing happening. Why didn't you pursue Sarah when you could and why did you get involved with the new GF? You say you love the GF so if you do put distance between you and Sarah make it clear that you are taken if not be clear with GF and put the distance between you and she so you can pursue Sarah. Stop sitting on the fence, make a decision and go with it. Love is just that a decision. When you decide to Love someone then True Love develops after the decision was made and you become to really know each other. God Bless
2006-12-13 11:01:14 · answer #2 · answered by Kdid49 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honestly; you should have pursued Sarah back in the day, because she wasn't that confident and perhaps the friendship gave her the motivation that she needed to come at you. everyone else was telling you that she was interested and quite honestly, you should listen because everyone else has a way of knowing things before the people that are actually involved do. you had those signs and that should have given you the motivation to pursue her, though I doubted that you were that interested in her back in the day.
you have to decide if you like Sarah for the right reasons; her not being that confident and sure of herself was perhaps a turn on because at least that told you that she was a nice girl, perhaps respectable etc, which is what one keeps in the back of their mind. you felt that it wasn't right for you to pursue her because you were getting out of a long relationship yourself. now knowing how she is, though she appears to be ok with your GF, you shouldn't make a move now because it'll blow up in your face and have you in a situation that is just wrong to begin with, despite your intentions. continue the frienship with Sarah, continue the relationship with your GF and see if she ever gets the point, but you have to do it in a way that it isn't obvious to your GF that Sarah is the reason why you're not so into her anymore. and you have to do it in a way that Sarah knows that you're not willing to do something stupid and crazy to be with her, though she'll eventually figure out that you like her as much. you still have plenty of time to sort this out, use it to your own advantage.
2006-12-13 10:34:35 · answer #3 · answered by collard greens with hash browns 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta put her out of your mind once and for all. If you cant maybe go after Sarah . Have coffee with her or just give her a call. Better now than to wait after or when you get married.
2006-12-13 10:29:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i normally wouldn't give anyone this advice but in this case i will say it...if sarah is the person that is always puttin a smile on your face than maybe you want to take that chance...i mean you knew her way before your current GF and just talk to her see how she really feels about you!
2006-12-13 10:31:25 · answer #5 · answered by Beautifull 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just stay stable whether its sarah or ur gf..but sarah sounds a nice name to me...!!
if u r sure about ur relationship with u rgirl friend,then u neednt think of any other thing...
just put urself some questions regarding both of them separately and i m sure u ll get an answer for urself...
all the best...
2006-12-13 10:30:05 · answer #6 · answered by For peace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay at one time i was in your place what i did was i made two lists of the best qualities about them one of which was alot longer and then i thought about it and i realized i didn't really love the other person so that lead me to my current bf Chris. we have been together for nearly a year.
2006-12-13 10:29:13 · answer #7 · answered by vixen63_babygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
coulda, shoulda, woulda
2006-12-13 10:27:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋