I am trying to sort things out with my ex and get back together. Infact I have been trying for a few months now. We` broke up because I was not sure about my feelings. She says she does not know what she wants so I am giving her some time.I know its only been ten days with no contact but it feels like ten months. She says she does not want me to wait or think about her as it is painful for both of us. She says she will always love me but how long do I wait for although I am not waiting if you get my drift. Its a wierd situation: I am not waiting but I am not moving on either but just getting on day to day. How long do I get on day to day for?
2006-12-13 02:08:39 · 13 answers · asked by Ed 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Stop what your doing and get on with your life, if she wants you she'll come back to you!!
2006-12-13 02:11:03 · answer #1 · answered by pinead101 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're in limbo and I feel for you because it's an awful place to be. There are two ways of looking at this.
1) Read between the lines of your question. You state: "She says she will always love me..." I said the same thing to my one serious ex-boyfriend when we broke up, and I had no intention of getting back with him. It is a parting phrase. Judging from that statement alone, your break up appears to be final.
2) On the other hand, this is a girl who was obviously devastated to hear that you weren't sure how you felt about her. She will be wondering whether it's worth getting back with you - what if you change your mind again? Could she cope with a second bout of rejection?
To be honest, if you've been trying for a few months with no joy, she is more hurt and insecure than you realise. I'm glad that she's asked you not to contact her for a while - this means she'll be working out whether she's just used to having you around or whether she actually misses you. I know it's difficult but DON'T give in and contact her just yet. She needs to have control and you're doing brilliantly by respecting her wishes.
I'm fairly sure she'll be in touch before Christmas. If not you have the perfect excuse to ring her next week and ask how she is, and how she's feeling about things. If she's still being evasive, I would push her a little by saying that if it really is over between you, you'd rather know now so that you can leave all the pain and disappointment in this present year - the last thing you want is to drag it into 2007.
Point out that you've tried for a few months to win her back and duly respected her wishes when she asked for no contact. I think she'll have had adequate time to decide by Xmas; although you can't really put a time limit on these things. The New Year should be one of two things: an opportunity for you to start afresh as a couple, or a clean break - fresh starts for you both as individuals.
I hope it all works out for you. x
2006-12-13 02:59:41 · answer #2 · answered by ibizagirl_2004 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is hard to say.. When me and my ex broke up it took me a while to stop the day by day thing. You almost have to grieve. You lost somebody you love and no matter what it is not easy. You will know when you are ready to move on. Your heart will tell you. I would not wait for her though. If it is meant to be it will be no matter what. Keep busy and time will go by quicker. But you can't let her call all the shots. If she does not know what she wants fine just don't stop living your life in the process of her figuring out hers.
2006-12-13 02:14:53 · answer #3 · answered by Sarah G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's playing you at your own game!
you say you broke up because you weren't sure or your feelings, now she's saying she's not sure of hers...
if you're sure you want to be with her, tell her that. if she doesn't take you up on the offer, move on!
2006-12-13 02:13:05 · answer #4 · answered by toscamo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out and start dating other people now. She sounds to me like she wants to break up, but is trying to be nice (but firm) in how to tell you.
2006-12-13 02:13:52 · answer #5 · answered by Jesse2k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you are the one who ruined it so maybe she moved on women like men who are sure of themselves she probably feels as if you will hurt her again if she takes you back.
2006-12-13 02:13:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your dumped, probably for another bloke or if your lucky a fit lesbian. Get your own back and sleep with her sister, mother or best friend. But to really hack her off all of them at once.
2006-12-13 02:13:08 · answer #7 · answered by the gay bear 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You made a big mistake so now grow up and leave the girl alone! She has feelings to!
2006-12-13 02:13:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is best to talk frankly to her about intentions and if you still feel there is a chance that she will come back ,wait for her. i think she loves. you.
2006-12-13 02:14:50 · answer #9 · answered by ANU U 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should wait till your feeling have really cleared up. If she did you wrong you should think of why you might want totake him back.
2006-12-13 02:12:10 · answer #10 · answered by Only1 Love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋