I am a 21 year old Black male, a junior in college and I attended a CFNM party (clothed females, nude male) and it was throw by 5 sorority sisters and whom of all were white. I agreed to go being a member of my frat. I am the only black guy in my fraternity and these 5 white girls are really hot in the Katie Holmes, Jessica Simpson molds. Beautiful blondes and brunettes. Anywa, if you are not familiar with CFNM, the guy is nude the entire time around the girls. I had to be there for 3 hours and basically was their servant etc. I ended up having a good time the first two hours but then a couple girls would make comments after I served them drinks, that I was a " good little monkey " etc etc which made me feel weird. They were nice to me otherwise but I heard that comment more than once. Also, at the end of the night, I did end up masturbating in front of them and after it was over, one girl Jackie called me " a dirty BOY ". Do you think this is racist? Should I tell my frat leader?
2006-12-13 01:21:26 · 24 answers · asked by donniesmello 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That really is a racial slur. I have heard that many times even though I am white. People I know that are racist have actually said that. So do whatever you have to because racism should not be tolarated. Just don't do anything TOO bad. lol :)
2006-12-13 01:25:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think the "monkey" comment could defininitely be taken as racial. But the "dirty boy" thing was simply because of the act which you performed. If a woman would have done what you did you could easily call her a dirty girl or worse, and I'm sure you would. Besides that, I don't think that some young white people are aware that the word "boy" can me perceived as racial by african americans. I empathize with how you were made to feel, but perhaps you should ask the girls what they meant, and explain to them what their words meant to you. Afterall, some people just don't know any better and could use a little"sensitivity training". This could actually be an opportunity to help change the world inwhich we live!
And on a more personal note, intelligent, classy black men are very sexy, so be that and next time keep your clothes on and you won't be so vulnerable to what people think or say.
2006-12-13 01:35:10 · answer #2 · answered by sassy2006 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you're uncomfortable with your race due to you being the only black guy in your frat, making you a little self-conscious and a tad paranoid.
I call my partner a monkey all the time, and he's white! He calls me a monkey all the time- and I'm white but of mixed race! Monkey is a cute, pet-name word. Monkeys are such adored animals, I doubt even racists can use the word towards another race without feeling silly!
The 'boy' thing- women call men 'boys' in sexual situations as it's more of a saucy thing to say. Imagine how unsexy it was if you were being called a 'dirty man' - that sounds like 'dirty old man' as in old, creepy pervert.
You're too paranoid, man! Chill out. These girls loved you! Remember, if we all watched what we said, the world would be so tense. Don't bring it up unless you experience real racism. If these girls didn't like black men, you wouldn't have been there. However, you were there and they clearly enjoyed your company!
I bet you'll have some stories to tell your grandkids about your frat years! ;-)
2006-12-13 01:32:09 · answer #3 · answered by midsojo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is a difficult thing to answer...
Probably the last one wasn't a racial slur... More of a demeaning thing... I get called a boy by women (bad boy, dirty boy, etc) and I'm 38... :D
As for the first ones, I would suggest making a note of it and see what happens in the future when you see those girls, and if it happenes again, mention it to your frat leader...
2006-12-13 01:26:48 · answer #4 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The dirty boy thing is nothing really but the racist jokes then that is something to think about I would talk to my frat leader about this and see what can be done, actually probably nothing because if there was drinking and all then they probably don't know what they have said to you and probably don't realize that you are insulted by there comments...but take it to your frat leader and if he feels that this is nothing then just move on.
2006-12-13 02:04:44 · answer #5 · answered by beagirl40 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Calling you a 'dirty boy' isn't racist; you did just j**z in front of them! The monkey bit... I guess it depends on the context of the night and you say they were nice otherwise, so maybe they were just untactful or this is just a word they use all the time and didn't see a reason to not use it. If they were nice otherwise then I'm sure they weren't meaning to cause offence.
2006-12-13 01:27:52 · answer #6 · answered by Violet-Angel 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think that the comments were made to establish who was in control. This is most definitely a game of dominance. Sweetie you don't really like being dominated by women. That's OK, It was just a sex game and you've gotten to know yourself better because of it! I don't think these girls meant to slur you, or they wouldn't have wanted to see you play with your 'anaconda'!!! So, just keep it in the "Damn I had a GOOD time file" and pray they invite you again and this time make them give up the snatch so the scores even!
It must be fun being your age at this time in civilization...better than the 60's for sure!
2006-12-13 01:35:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't think it necessarily was racial slurs at least not intentionally. I'm not just saying this because you think I'm white, I'm actually asian and I think when they said those things, they meant it in a naughty way...not because they meant to be racist. I don't think you should worry about it. They probably had the hots for you. It's so easy to overlook those comments so lay back and enjoy unless it starts to get disturbing then maybe you should discuss it with your frat leader.
2006-12-13 01:30:36 · answer #8 · answered by pangfvlx 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok,..lets disect. First of the idiot part of your brain took you to this party. The monkey comments were very racist and the dirty boy comments were correct, only a boy(immature would find himself masterbating nude in front of a bunch of drunk women,you following me here, so next time keep your goods and your dignity at home.
2006-12-13 01:30:21 · answer #9 · answered by iroc 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Racism is in the way a person take things. When they were referring to little monkey they were just referring to being their servant nothing more. If they were racist why would they even want to associate with you. The only reason racisim exists is cause people take things to literal and find new meanings for things that are meant to be that way.
2006-12-13 01:25:44 · answer #10 · answered by andyramvzb 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋