Three years ago, my ex-boyfriend cheated on me with my cousin. When I found out, I immediately broke up with him and left my cousin alone. But for some reason, the incident constantly plays back in my mind. He tries to call me to get back with me, but I ignore his calls because I am in a happy relationship with someone who loves me the way that I love him. But the problem is that I have a hard time trusting my present boyfriend. I know that he loves me because everyday he does something sweet for me, but I think that he's eventually going to cheat on me too. What should I do?
2006-12-13 00:57:51 · 18 answers · asked by Lady Smooth 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well I think that you should learn to trust your current boyfriend. Because I dont think its fair that he cant win your trust just because of some jerk who hurt you. I know its hard to trust other people after you've been hurt but its something that takes time and you have to learn to do. I can personally say it took me a long time to trust again after I was hurt by some guy I really liked. But dont make the few sweet guys out there suffer for the many jerks and idiots in the world. And plus just like i had to learn you gotta learn to stop living in the past and look on to the future.Because the only thing the past holds is lots and lots of pain and i can say from personal experience thats all thats in the past. If you need anything email me at Dominikana_21@yahoo.com
2006-12-13 01:05:29 · answer #1 · answered by D21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you move right into a courting you open your self as much as the probability of having harm. That's how it's. It particularly is a RISK. There is not any assurance that you will not be betrayed. You can handiest desire. You can on no account dictate the movements of your companion, so the probability of being harm by means of him is there. Sometimes you can be amazed how a lot you do not know a man or woman regardless of how lengthy you've gotten recognized him. I comprehend that you'll be jaded in spite of everything this. Investing such a lot to simply get harm eventually. I consider the rationale you can not recover from it's considering that your delight used to be harm. How can a man who has the whole lot he wishes in a female friend cheat? I think easily considering that a few folks simply do not know the way to importance what they've. They are simply on no account convinced. It's his loss. Don't fear, you continue to have your delight and dignity intact 'cuz you stepped out and left him the second you learned alternatively than stayed and approved the problem. Charge all of it to revel in. Don't be afraid to threat once more. That's side of lifestyles. If it occurs(once more), prefer your self up, dirt your self, and preserve on going for walks, do not seem again. There is a pronouncing that for those who present a man or woman your hand and he grabs your arm, he isn't a well man or woman, so be careful. Set fair limits to what you're going to present/do in a courting. If your companion needs extra or forces then you that are supposed to be a caution.
2016-09-03 17:12:40 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All I can say is that your present boyfriend is not the man who cheated on you....you should by all means keep your guard up....trust is earned.....but enjoy your relationship with him....do not let this other relationship ruin what you have now....maybe talk to your present boyfriend about how much cheating in the past hurt you....and how you have a difficult time trusting now....open communication is the key to a healthy relationship.....if he loves you and cares he will want to know whats going on with you through the good and bad....
2006-12-13 01:02:53 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you really love this new boyfriend like you say you do. Give him a chance. If he hasn't done anything to have your mistrust he sure doesn't deserve to be treated so unfairly.
I know it's hard to trust again but you will have to try harder for the sake of this relationship because if there's no trust, there's no relationship.
The best of luck with everything and I hope you get the strength to get over your insecurities.
2006-12-13 01:04:18 · answer #4 · answered by Minouners 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you should reconcile with your cousin, because family is forever. Second dont throw away a once in a lifetime relationship just because of what you think is going to happen. Dont make the new boyfriend pay for the old ones mistake.
2006-12-13 01:02:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats a horrible thing to get hurt like that so its no wonder you have a hard time trusting your new bf. Unfortunately theres no easy answer to this one; your feelings are perfectly natural and its going to take time to begin to trust guys again. Just remember your bf is not your ex;he sounds like a nice guy so try not to let the past interfere with your future.
2006-12-13 01:13:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, put it this way..
You had gone through a difficult stuff and now you make it as a valuable lesson in order to make you a better person..
You are now with somebody new and he loves you the way you love him.. You got to let go of those bad memories.. otherwise it will not be fair for your current flame..
Letting go of bad experience is not easy, but you will get there..
Past experience is to make us smarter and wiser, dun make it as a block in your current relationship..
I know you can make it girl..
Happy trusting :D
2006-12-13 01:06:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut off communication with the ex completely. Push him out of your mind and ficus on the present. The ex messed up your past, son't give him any more power over you. Make a list of why you desrve good love and accept it.
2006-12-13 01:10:50 · answer #8 · answered by Tziporrah B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you have anything other than your general mistrust of your boyfriend to go on? Your mistrust of your boyfriend probably stems from being hurt in the past and you may be mistreating him by assuming he will be like your ex. Talk to him about it. If you can't communicate your fears and/or he won't talk with you about your fears, that may indicate that you need to end the relationship.
2006-12-13 01:00:25 · answer #9 · answered by AlaskaGirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well dear,i know how you feel i have been there also..you trustet him and you got hurt but thats past dear and i know its not easy to trust again and it takes a while to do again..but just try hard with your new boyfriend ..and it seems he truly loves you ..give him a chance and try to stop thinking that he will do the same like your ex did
2006-12-13 01:02:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋