I work nights in a lab. I am the only woman in the entire building. We have the freedom to listen to radios and cd's. We each take turns listening to our music each night. There is a guy that listens to really nasty X rated music. the subject is eating pussy, blowjobs, fake ****, ******* whores etc. Really nasty rap music. I have told him in a friendly way that it offends me, but he continues to listen to it very loud. It embarreses me. There is no supervisor on our shift. My question is, should I just let the guy listen to this offensive music, or should I talk to a mangager about it. I dont want to be too much of a prude, but it bothers me. If I cause a problem we could lose our radio priveleges all around. What would you do?
2006-12-12 22:12:20 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think your HR department would have some guidelines about that. File a complaint because making you listen to stuff with lyrics like that IS harrasment in the workplace. You've asked him not to play that and he turns it up? This is when the "nice guy" gloves comes off. It has nothing to do with being a prude. Employees sue over stuff like this so I think your employer would stop it immediately(a liability issue). If your co-worker gets upset tell him you tried being nice about it but since his behavior proves he can't be adult about it then he gave you no other choice. Now at this point if "Bevis" ups the ante(so to speak) you file a unusual
occurence report EVERY time this clown can't act in a adult professional manner in the workplace. GOOD LUCK!!!
2006-12-12 22:26:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a woman and fellow employee, you have the right to your space! It would be important for you to ask this guy again if he could pick some different songs because you personally find his current playlists offensive. Make it clear when you mention this again that you are not attacking him as a person, but the music he chooses for everyone to listen to happens creates an uncomfortable working environment for you. If he still goes on playing disturbing rap and such without regarding your concerns, then talk to a manager.
If *he* on the other hand, finds YOUR music offensive, as some other responses suspected, wait for HIM to TELL YOU. This isn't, after all, a music war. The point of music in the first place was to keep all you working through the night at comfort. Therefore, there should be music that everyone likes, just not one person - that's just selfishness!
2006-12-12 22:28:34 · answer #2 · answered by A M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is against the law. Its called sexual harrassment. First, you must complain. Start a paper trail. Make copies of your complaints. If your supervisor doesn't stop it immediately, go up the food chain keeping your paper trail intact. Also make a list of any phone calls you may make, including the name or names of the person or persons to whom you spoke. The date and times of the calls, and the content of the conversations.
If there is still nothing done, you can hire a lawyer and file a lawsuit. Employers are not allowed to let employees create a hostile work environment, or to have sexually explicit material forced upon unwilling employees. Being able to choose your own music is not carte blanche for playing pornographic material in the work place. You could also try to record some of the more explicit music to help make your case. Good luck to you.
2006-12-12 23:11:43 · answer #3 · answered by Firespider 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the employees probably shouldn't be choosing the music to be played in the workplace, and if you make a stink, and threaten law suits, that problem may be taken care of. I am on your side, I don't think pornographic rap should be allowed anywhere in public.
However, consider the consequences, and all the people who suggest you listen with earphones to your own music or wear sound blockers makes more sense, especially if you are the ONLY one complaining. If there are others upset, then as a group you need to approach the man, and give him notice that you as a group will take action if he doesn't cut the rap.
2006-12-13 00:00:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask the manager if everyone can listen to their own music with headphones. Tell the manager that someone's music is offensive, and you don't want them to have to stop listening to music, but can each person use headphones and have it low enough so that they can hear over it if something happens. That may work better for everyone so that they can all hear what they want all the time. And never go out with this guy on a date, if he listens to that then how do you think he treats women?
2006-12-13 01:33:10 · answer #5 · answered by GLSigma3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I drive truck, my partner loves country music, which I dispise with all my being. Now we aren't talking about the same genre, however, the concept is the same. I listen to stuff I'm certain isn't appealing to her... so I feel it's a wash. Now I can't say as I'd like to listen to what you have to endure at all. However, if it's set up on a system where you play your music, it may just bother him to no end to listen to it. I'd just go with the flow. Also, here's a bit of advise... When you tell someone you don't like the music they listen to, some people will play it, just to get to you. They enjoy the fact that they are getting you more than they may be enjoying the music it's self. So, act as if it doesn't bother you for a while... see what happens...
2006-12-12 22:19:04 · answer #6 · answered by damond h 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There's really alot of thing to think about.
1'st I don't know what kind of person that guy is, if he's nice enough you can try more to persuade him, but i guess you've try that already and still posting this answer;
but if he's that bad, maybe talking to the manager, will make it worse for you, the guy might get offended even more, and assault you, even thou you can sue the guy latter, but it's already happen and what ever happer you've already loose,
2'nd i don't know what kind of your job is, but if it's posible, maybe you should backoff, and start listening with your own player with a headphone, again if it's posible,
n. i don't think talk to him, apolagize to him or turning your music off would settle the problem, because by ywhat you're telling me, it doesn't seem that he is a good guy, good enough to be persuaded, i mean.
Hope This Help
Bless You
2006-12-13 22:48:51 · answer #7 · answered by N-Rue 7 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this person is deliberately pushing the envelope. I would speak to my supervisor. Do any of the other men find offense in this rap music? If so, join forces and go to the supervisor. Here's another thought. They may just be trying to get a rise out of you. Try ignoring it a little while longer and the children may tire of their game.
2006-12-12 23:53:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time for some music wars. If you have told your manager and everyone else that might be able to get this guy to stop, you might just have to do something yourself. First of all, get a really good boom box or, if you're really ambitious, get to work early and set up a full stereo system. Get your favorite kind of music. Set the volume up all the way, plug your ears, press play, and RUN!
Hope this helps!
2006-12-14 15:35:51 · answer #9 · answered by Leafy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably hates some of the other music he has to listen to on nights he dosen't get to play what he wants. The lyrics in the music are not directed toward you. It's just music with lots of dirty words. Try to ignore it if you can. If you can't, tell him directly that his music offends you and if he dosen't pick something less offensive your going to tell your boss.
You ask what I would do I would ignore it. It's just music. Not a statement about me or to me.
2006-12-13 00:23:49 · answer #10 · answered by bmoregurl23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋