Do I wait on fiance' who says he may go back to ex wife and has not loved me, but learn to..?

Question

Fiance' has said for past year he loves me , then all of a sudden he claims he has not loved me just cared for me and then he tells me if his ex wife would ask him back he would have to really think about it ., Said it has not been brought up to date but yes he does love her still and is not over her . He has asked me to give him time to figure out what he wants. I deeply love this man , and even though I do not feel his ex wife shares the type of love that I have for him , I feel his happiness is the most important part of the puzzle. In the meantime , I am trying to stay postive and re focus my energy and time in different areas of my life , it is still the most painful experience I have encountered, I am just sick , and confused... He had just told me 1 hour prior to telling me he wanted his space that he "Loved me" .. Need advice please ..

Answer 1

You have dedicated yourself and your heart to a man who does not feel that strongly about you. You deserve better. You deserve a man who will give you his whole heart and soul, not withdraw it when he sees a chance to be with someone else. I know it hurts, but it is time to move on.

Answer 2

This is tough. You are doing well by focusing your energy on other things. Give him some time, but also try to remind him of the woman he fell in love with. He had to have feelings for you to propose in the first place.
Just do not go through with a mariage until he is ready and you are completely sure that the man is in love with you. You don't want this to happen again after your married. Just remember, if this doesn't work out (and hopefully it will) you will find someone who loves you as much as you love them. You sound like a very nice and caring person. Good luck in everything.

Answer 3

You know what, honor his wish. Leave him alone.

You are lucky you aren't married to this man yet, so keep it this way. If I were you, I'd also break this engagement. There is no reason why you want to continue this relationship with a man who doesn't even know exactly what he wants. But if you still want to be engaged with him, make sure you stay engaged and don't get married until you are really really really sure.

But to be honest with you, I just don't see it happening. I understand you love him, but it may be a better idea to step back and be just friends with him first and see how it goes from there. Remember, hurt now is better than later! Good luck!

Answer 4

Time's up---you spent enough time on this--the answer is very clear---the image you project is pitiful---you know the answer----move on-----immediately. Good grief, aren't there any other men in your town? Set up goals a bit higher. I would love to hear his side of this story but you sound like a mercy hump for this guy. You certainly are capable of more in your life. Good luck

Answer 5

i'm not confident i comprehend what to inform you. this is sparkling that both of you nonetheless experience love for one yet another - although in truth, each and every so often that only isn't adequate. existence is troublesome. and sophisticated. i wager my suggestion to you ought to be to get some remedy only for your self - you've a quite good grip on the belongings you want to artwork on, on your section in why issues went South. best for you. Now, get with a therapist who can help you smash a number of those habit. you've were given a troublesome row to hoe, Honey, including your warfare studies, your damage, or maybe with different bags you've been wearing previously you went to Iraq. i think coping including your human being themes is one thanks to make issues more advantageous suited in case you do get decrease back mutually. First: remedy. 2d: call him. tell him you in elementary words opt for to enable him comprehend what you're feeling, without expectancies or guilt (and really, haven't any expectancies, and do not motel to guilt tripping). Then tell him how heartbroken you're, and that you probably did not truly opt for issues to end. tell him you're engaged on the stuff that you're feeling you probably did that contributed for your smash-up, interior the hopes of placing out over, and with any luck getting it "accurate" this time. All you should do is try. All you should do is positioned all of it accessible. i'm sorry for your issues, and that i'm grateful to you and all service adult males and females those who protect our us of a. happy with you. Now, get your self a therapist, artwork on a number of those issues, and bypass get your guy decrease back. I truly wish it truly works out. :)

Answer 6

You Should Not Let Him Do That!!...He Is Just waiting for his ex to want to get back with him!!...yeah, i am sure he has feelings for you, but he is just trying to keep you there, just incase something were to go wrong with them, he would have a backup (YOU)....you should just let him have his "SPACE" and try to get over it.....cause if he was deeply in love with you, there would be no question about getting back with her!!!...he would not have to choose, he would just know it was you.....but i know how you feel about not wanting to let him go, cause you love him!!...it has happened to me before!!!

Answer 7

Grrrr...he's being a wishy-washy jerk and you're suffering for it.

If I were in your shoes I'd back way off and go pursue my own thing. He's going to figure it out with her, or not. In the meantime, go do your own thing, follow your dreams, work on your career, your house, your other interests and just be busy. When he figures himself out he may or may not come back, and you may or may not want him if he does.

Answer 8

Sounds to me like too much baggage. I would get on with my life.