How do you deal with a lover that.....?

Question

How do you deal with a man that you were in a relationship with for 2 years but now you are no longer with as being comitted to because he's no longer happy with the love you gave him and showed him on a daily basis. In other words the love wasn't enough for him anymore. He's dating another woman now and I know he very much in love with her but he refuses to admit it to me I believe because of fearing that I would be hurt. But the fact is I have already felt the pain from him wanting more than I could give him. I must admit that I'm not officially dating anyone at this time and i realize that he is very happy about that but the only reason why I'm not is because I havent met anyone that I'm interested in as of yet. But in the mean time I do still have a partime sexual relationship with him but it's only for conveince for me right now and for him, he's getting his icecream and cake. I don't want to do this type of relationship anymore. I don't want to fall for his charm how do I get out

Answer 1

He has shown he has moved on. He has another woman and no telling what he may be bringing to you when you continue to sleep with him. Please don't put yourself through that anymore. You are strong and can break free from the hold he has on you. Show him that you don't need him or that he can't subject you to such pain. Love yourself enough to walk away and love will find you. Why would you want to share him with another woman? Get out now and stop giving him the ice cream and cake.

Answer 2

I may not be the expert but i understand how you feel...for starts try resisting the urge of doing anything with him because the more you give yourself to him the harder you are going to fall and then he is going to think he has the upper hand on you b/c technically it's like your taking him back but not completely...Or tell him exactly how you feel rather than bottle up emotions then take time away from everyone and re-evaluate your life and think about what you want out of life...then thing's should fall into place...Keep yourself busy and occupied it will help you take your mind off of him...if he really loves you or loved you he wouldn't even put you through this, obviously he isn't man enough to think about other people's feelings.

Answer 3

First of all, stop being his cake, honey. I think you are well on your way to doing that or you wouldn't be asking.

Then stop talking to him. You are also his crutch - emotional affairs are intoxicating too. stop being that for him.


Then, be happy. Sounds easy - isn't. But once you get your life back one of two things will happen. Either he will see a whole dfferent women - one he is suddenly interested in or you won't give a flying frig and this question will be forgotten altogether.

I'm betting on the latter.
Smiles, honey.

Oh - you asked "how to get out". Paul Simon said it best in 50 ways to leave your lover - just pick anything. You may be making it hard for a reason - so you don't have to do it. Don't make that your excuse "slip out the back Jack... make a new plan stan... don't need to be coy roy... just get yourself free..."

Answer 4

girl you need to leave his As$! Hes nothing! You need someone who treats you like a princess. A real man. He doesnt deserve you. I know its hard because I was n a similar relationship but the best thng is to do is to move on and it'll take your mind off him. A relationship isn't suppose to be based on sex either. All your doing is keeping yourself emotionally attached which is hurting you the most because thinking giving him your all he'll stay..well its not true. Guys are dogs. And any men who deny that are stupid they know well what they are. You just need to take the time and give someone else a chance but dont give in to them so fast take things easy..... just leave that guy seriously you'll feel alot better

Answer 5

How do you get out???? Simply say goodbye---you are being pityfully used because you don't want to face the inevitable fact that it is over. Pain, pain, pain----everyone faces pain---snap out of it and move on.Eventually a nice man satistied with your love will come along and you will be happy as a clam.Until then, smile, be nice, be open to new people--experience all that your youth has to offer---nothing worse than sitting home doing nothing. It's all up to you. No one is doing anything to you---you do it to yourself----now go out and make stuff happen...forget about this guy.

Answer 6

Honey,you have a serious for this man,and he knows it. That is why he can come slinkin' around your door and get the undies anytime he wants...cause you let him! For one thing,if he was "in love" with this other woman,what is he still doing with you and why are you letting him do it? If I were you,I'd take some time for me and think this one out. You know what you need to do,you just need to find the nerve to do it. i know what you're thinking,if you let him goyou won't have anything or anyone for a while but sweetie,maybe you need is to be by yourself for a little bit and concentrate on you before you concentrate on another relationship. Do what you gotta do girl,I know you can do it. Hell,I had to do it too,we all have.

Answer 7

Your not going to meet someone while still having a parttime sexual relationship w. him. Why are you even wasting your time w, a guy who is in love with another and sleeping with her too? Dont you think you deserve more? Of course it sucks and its going to hurt but in the long run you will meet someone great.

Just stop talking to him. Start dating like crazy just to keep your mind off him and soon he will be a memory.

Answer 8

Hey Needalyfe, how about honoring yourself first. You are your own best friend. You are the greatest. Honor yourself by loving yourself and accepting yourself for the great and wonderful person you are. And while you're at it, are you honoring yourself by maintaining a relationship with a man who doesn't Honor you? If you just want some sex, he may be fine. Of course there's always masturbating...even though it's a bit lonely. Show me who a person is sleeping with and I'll tell you what they think of themselves. Do you think well of yourself for continuing with this guy? If not, look to yourself for your own pleasure and enjoy yourself. You've already decided he isn't for you...so drop him. Get on with your life. Merry Christmas.

Answer 9

Well, for starters, stop sleeping with him... we all know how to take care of ourselves, or should.

And a question, does this other woman know he's still sleeping with you? If not, that's pretty wrong on his part.

Anyway. Move on, stop sleeping with him like I said. If you're still friends, don't spend time alone together - you'll end up in bed.

If you need a man, find a temporary sex partner.

Hang out with friends... avoid him.

You've got to, since you mentioned that he's charming.
Its the only way for you to get out.

Sorry.

-dh

Answer 10

Are u still his girlfriend?or are u just having sex with him?How do you know he loves this other woman?I think you should leave him, he's just using you-it sounds like you're both using eachother.Only you can decide if you want to leave him.Do you buy him things,or do things for him/spoil him - do you go above & beyond for this guy?because if you do then he's just using you.He's probably with you because his new girl doesn't do half the things you do for him.He can love this girl & she's not doing anything for him but he's just with you because you probably do things for him still.You should leave this loser, you deserve better.he doesn't deserve you, you seem smart & nice & i bet you're real pretty too - better lookin than him!you can get anyone you want so don't settle for him.give your love to someone else who'll appreciate it!He's probably some con artist who goes aroundcharming women & using them.why stick around when he doesn't want to be with only you?he's a dog, leave him please! :)