My boyfriend and I live 3 hours away from eachother, he's moving here in March for college (he's 17), and we love eachother. A LOT.
We've been dating ever since April. (almost 9 months). We've gotten into our fights, a few short breakups so he could date other girls while waiting to move here for college..my only rule was NO SEX. (He really likes to talk about sex.)Then I got really jealous, and I hated the fact he was kissing other girls. So, he came back to me. ANYWAY, Last month, for about a week, he didn't want to talk about sex. I was REALLY concerned as to what was going on with him. It turns out, he had met a girl (new there) and she was a major wh*re. They had sex one night and he stayed out till 1 AM and never called me. I was INFURIATED. And I didn't know what to do..You have no idea how bad I was hurt. He said she "seduced" him. Anyway, we got back together after he pleaded for forgiveness. He swore he'd do anything for me to prove his love for me.(read details)
2006-12-12 16:05:56 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
So, I know he really loves me. A couple people said "everyone deserves a second chance." Another said, when a guy gets a chance for sex, he's taking it. So...... I don't know.. I love him to death. And he says he loves me sooo much (he gets into details). He said that night, she messed with his head. As I said, no one can make you do anything. We still love eachother. I just wanted to ask for your opinions.
Please no smart alic remarks. I'm hurt and don't need that.
THANKS!!!
mucho amor
2006-12-12 16:09:02 · update #1
If someone really loves you they don't feel the need to date around because you live 3 hours away.
I don't think you should refer to this other girl he slept with as a whore. Why do females feel the need to debase each other? He saw an opportunity and he didn't feel guilty about it until you made him feel guilty. She probably wasn't aware of you. I can't imagine he told her about you.
Now that he's moving there to attend college I'm sure he'll have many more of these opportunities come his way. He has shown you that he's open to them already what makes you think he won't satisfy his needs while he plays this game with you. You are allowing this behavior. People can only get away with what you let them. Value yourself more and just date more. Why do you want to be in a committed relationship at such a young age. You have so much life to experience!
When I was reading your letter I kept getting the impression what you were really looking for was someone or many someones to reaffirm this bad relationship. Move on and be grateful you learned early not to let anyone take you for granted.
2006-12-12 16:34:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but I'm thinking that this isn't love.
You might really care for him, but if you did, why would you let him take breaks so he could see other girls?
Whether sex is involved or not, you don't share the one you love with another woman, and he shouldn't expect you to if he loves you.
And assuming that he did love you and you him, and somehow through that love you were able to give him the freedom to date other women, you set out one simple ground rule (no sex) and he broke it. I would expect a girl to dump me if I slept with another girl, and I would deserve it.
IT's up to you what you do, but you're setting yourself up for dissappointment by staying.
2006-12-13 00:19:12 · answer #2 · answered by Alberta Sunrise 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your bf has showed you that he cant be trusted but he blames the other girl. There will be more guys out there for you, but it is up to you whether you will forgive him or not. If you really trust him then you guys might have a chance, but otherwise this issue will play a major role in future fights.
2006-12-13 00:23:17 · answer #3 · answered by penny01 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok look at it like this way, if he has broken up with you just so he can fool around with girls and cheated one you then do you really think he will stop and a question for you do you want someone in your life that’s going to treat you like the 2nd rate girl and cause you that much pain?
2006-12-13 00:27:25 · answer #4 · answered by Chef Chris 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, boys of 17 have hormones beating hectic drums and will do anything to have sex include lying to you. A 17 year old is not ready for a lasting relationship. He needs to go out there and still find out who he is. Dont try to tie him down because it will matter when he gets older. As for not having sex with him, good for you. If you have never had sex before remember this: A virgin still maintains her dignigty and integrity. All the girls around you who have had sex can be told that you can be what they are in 3 minutes, but they can never be what you still are again! Dont be to hasty to walk that road, in fact if you are a girl who believes in GOd, be biblical.. GOd tells you to refrain from sex before marriage and he has many reasons why. You are not nerdy if you listen to the right voices either! Live your life to the full and get yourself prepared for the one you will marry one day, but dont think a 17 year old guy will be the one. He is far too green and immature. Girls mature far quicker than guys do. Dont fall for his ploys. He is not going to be honest with you. I know you think you love him but rather a little hurt now than a terrible ordeal one day later. I want to suggest you buy 2 books to help you understand what makes men tick; the one is called WIld at Heart by John Eldredge and the second Captivating by his wife Staci Eldredge. Go read those. I highly recommend these books. They are really good. You need to learn now how to deal with men and how to become a fulfilled woman. You yourself are young and have many years ahead of you. DOnt go falling pregnant now because of lust. Please be wise. I wish someone had told me all this when I was a teenager!
I really urge you to think carefully. THe world is going down because of all the wrong things that they try to convince you are right, when they know they are not. Morality has gone completely down the tubes. THere really is a reason GOd tells people not to do the things they do and because people dont like to hear this, they claim the bible is rubbish and for those who are nerdy.
THey are blinded by their own deception. Please you are young still. THink hard about your life and dont try to be like others. Start now finding out who you are and why you are here and what your purpose in life is going to be and run with it! YOur friends are not going to be there forever. People move on and couldnt give a fig about what happens to you. GOd cares and thats why I would rather listen to him than to people who let you down. Satan will use people to bring you down with them. Become accountable and stand up for yourself from this very day onwards. A wise person listens to good counsel.
Nothing happens for nothing. Listen to sound advise.
Good luck and may you one day really meet the man of your dreams. Be patient too.
2006-12-13 00:29:11 · answer #5 · answered by uniquechild 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, the only thing I can think of to say is...grow up. This guy has cheated on you first by kissing other girls, then by sleeping with another girl, and you haven't learned your lesson? Get rid of him NOW!
2006-12-13 00:10:07 · answer #6 · answered by cardinalfanusa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im waiting for details but drop that zero u shouldnt be treated like that
2006-12-13 00:08:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
bad break
2006-12-13 00:09:52 · answer #8 · answered by tacha_cb 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋