Ok, i can't seem to give my girlfriend an orgasm even though im going for 20 mins straight and my penis is 6-7 inches according to how horny i am. She says she loves it n keeps moaning in pleasure all the time but then y doesn't she get an orgasm. I guess i should add that she was a virgin till 3 weeks ago n we meet every weekend so we only had sex a few times. She is in pain everytime we do it and if i get too "excited" she stops me cause she gets hurt. Last time she even bled and i though she had her period at first but she told me later that she didn't (we had sex later so she had to tell me). Am i doing something wrong? Is it because of the pain? I know I'm reaching her g-spot cause I know were it is. Once while we were having sex she stopped me twice to rest a few seconds and then let me back in again. Most of the sex is in medium pace (cause she wanted it that way). Do u think i should increase the speed? I also changed positions alot, NOTHING seems to work, Please help me out!!
2006-12-12 15:53:14 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I do start with foreplay first. Hands fingers and i even give her head. Oh and btw she really feels uncomftable giving me head.
2006-12-12 16:00:30 · update #1
There is already excellent info here. My advice is quit pressuring her! She probably won't orgasm with you because I agree that it takes years for a woman to find what it takes. And even if she can orgasm before learning what she needs, she won't be able to do it on command or tell you how to make it happen again until she has masterbated alone and maybe with a vibrator. Get her the swan or the rabbit ear vibrator. Those with clit stimulators are awesome. Buy her a shower massage with a long hose (we had to buy the hose separate and change the one it came with) so it is long enough she can lie in the tub or sit on it's edge and use waterplay on herself.
Realize that if you were gonna have sex and suddenly couldn't get it up, that talking about it and focussing on it won't help. The idea is to make her really really secure with you. Accept every sound, talk to her while you eat her and tell her how amazing she tastes, how sweet and juicy her pu*** is in your mouth. Tell her you love watching her stomach as she breaths deep slow sexy breaths.
Tell her not to come! Seriously take the pressure off! Tell her you want to just experience her taste, smell, and for her to do the same with you... all for the taking and not for the performance.
Ask her to play a game of arching up against you rythmically as your hand or two fingers run from her love box all the way up to circle her breasts and back down. Over and over do this and watch her face. Become a student of her facial and body expressions. Read her and find out what makes her tick or shudder and do it again. Study her for a month or so like this and put it all together with slow NO MAKE IT VERY S L O W lovemaking. No fast stuff buddy! Girls like it slow and sensual. Wear musk or spray her with it and rock her world slow and gentle and break in the middle or after you get off and eat her for 20 minutes while you get hard again. Repeat as needed. LOL
2006-12-13 11:38:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her what SHE thinks the problem is. Since she is new at this could be many things. Maybe she is not wet enough when u start. Try a vaginal lube, may help with the bleeding as well. Try more foreplay, Use your fingers and tongue, and see if she orgasms that way. Maybe next time try everything BUT your penis on her and see how long it takes her to orgasm! Finally, you say she loves it and keeps moaning all the time, and then you say "she is pain everytime we do it". Is she faking one of these?
Good Luck
2006-12-12 16:14:20 · answer #2 · answered by Supercell 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some women bled a little every time they have sex. The vagina, however, is very adaptable and accomidating. If your girlfriend was a virgin up till you met her, and you've only had sex a couple times, its very possible that she hasn't yet adapted "down there".
Most women need clitoral stimulation to have an orgasm during sex. Try a position in which you can most easily stimulate(rub) her clit. Experiment with angles, speed and techniques, but remember that she probably won't climax without some form of clitoral stimulation.
2006-12-12 16:05:50 · answer #3 · answered by carriebhe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First RELAX. She is new to the sex thing, it's going to take her a little while to learn what works for her and what doesn't. You need to go the speed she requests. If going faster or harder hurts her, you're not going to accomplish much. Try to stimulate her clitoris with your finger or tongue before intercourse. That may help some. Some women don't orgasm with intercourse, only clitoral stimulation, so that may be your problem, along with her in experience. It will all come with time and practice.
2006-12-12 15:59:00 · answer #4 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I really don't want to answer too much at once, this is a different question. But more than likely she isn't lubricated and it's hurting her. And sometimes it takes women years to figure out what orgasm is..
But I would definitely ask her about that, there are products to help and at that age or that time in your sexual maturity, that seems like it might be it.
You could also just be young too.. too much force.. easy brother.. easy.. she might need it easy at first.. Whether she's wanting it or not.. it might be too hard for her to handle.
2006-12-12 16:04:02 · answer #5 · answered by LifeisGood 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know this may sound bad but try using your tounge on her clitoris or using your finger, GENTLY on her clitoris. The clitoris is EXTREMELY sensitive but if gently stroked can give her great pleasure. It will help in getting her excited and get the fuilds flowing more so its more lubricted. Also don't be afraid of using a lubricant like K-Y jelly. Make sure it is condom friendly!! Be patient. She was a virgin a short time ago and you are quite large. Don't go too fast and let her ease into it. Hope this helps
2006-12-12 16:03:25 · answer #6 · answered by newfiemomma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends on the woman but my current girlfriend prefers getting off from oral sex. It also helps her to have clitoral stimulation during intercourse. Try this, lay on your back facing the ceiling, let her on top but facing away from you, or towards your feet. This allows her to set the pace, at the same time rub her genitals with your hand this should help her climax. Of course the best thing to help her get off is to ask her what feels the best for her, because like i said it depends on the woman.
Good luck
2006-12-12 16:09:25 · answer #7 · answered by smartestmanalive 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go down on her first and then do it. make sure when you go down there you tease her a bit licking inside and all around, then really focus on the clit. You could even stop like half way through and go down again. Oral sex helps to loosen the muscles and make it easier for a woman to reach a climax.
2006-12-12 15:58:31 · answer #8 · answered by killersaint 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
any girl is lucky to be able to have an orgasm during sex. it is actually a rare thing. your gf might only be able to have an orgasm from oral sex or from clitoral stimulation. try doing these things right before having sex, you might get her excited enough to where she can have an orgasm
2006-12-12 15:56:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get some KY warming lubricant :P
See if she likes that then .....or try foreplay drive her CRAZY beofore there is any sexual intercourse....i know with my borfriend if he just sticks it in me i will not have an orgasm an dit doesnt feel special or worth while. Help her out!! Tease her
2006-12-12 15:59:00 · answer #10 · answered by cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋