i'm 20 yrs old and i know it sounds ridiculous to ask for advice on how to ask my mom to move out, but in the asian culture, parents are more strict and old traditional. My boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years, and i would love to move out with him. how do i bring this up to her without hurting her feelings or getting her angry?
2006-12-12 15:32:19 · 8 answers · asked by anonymous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm Chinese too, but I don't exactly have the best advice. My mom and dad are furious and won't even let me have a boyfriend, but here is what i would do, i would slowly get intothe conversation,and very carefully bring the subject up. If u sense that she is getting mad or frustrated, then quickly change the subject, and say It's just a thought. This is how I would start. Me: M. M: Mom,do u remember what it waslike being my age, did u have a boyfriend? Mom: Yes, there were plenty of times that I enjoyed being ur age. M: Well,my boyfriend is moving to a new place.Mom: Uhhh huu M: What ifI moved in with him, but think about it, he could drive me anywhere I want and he will pay for all the things that u usually can't afford. Mom: what? that's crazy, M: I know,but let me at least do it for like a month or two, and promise me ull think about it, and if I enjoy it then I'll move in with him. Mom: Okay!
M: thank u soooooo much! Mom: but if u don't like it, then feel free to move back in !!
2006-12-12 15:43:39 · answer #1 · answered by resaml 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah-so you love him long time.If your in the states and you have been here for a while your already "Americanized" and therefore "ruined" beyond all hope. She'll get over it in no time. But the best way is to talk to her about it and ask her advice, but let her know it's something you have to do. The thing that Parents struggle with the most, is not having someone to look after all of a sudden.So keep that door open ,let her know you need her advice and comfort now more than ever
2006-12-12 15:57:06 · answer #2 · answered by Mr.Obvious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter moved out when she was 19. I'm a very easy going parent and have always let my children make their own choices and decisions. Still - I was devastated!! It is so hard for a mom!!
Because of the cultural differences, I'm not sure I'm qualified to give advice to you. My parents were extremely controlling. I danced to my mother's tune decades after I moved out because I was afraid of her.
The thing to remember is no matter how much your mother thinks your first loyalty should be to her, that's not correct. Your first loyalty is to YOURself. If you expect to make a life with someone, you both must put each other first. Don't expect him to put you first if you don't put him first. And do not accept less from him.
2006-12-12 16:11:12 · answer #3 · answered by Same Song Different Verse 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she will probably be hurt because it gets lonely and its change. when my youngest moved out to live with his gf I was hurt and felt kind of betrayed. I got over it.
Have a present or flowers and tell her how much you love her and all that she did for you. Take her out to lunch or dinner and show her how much you love her, she may get hurt, but time will help that.
2006-12-12 15:37:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her use to the idea that you want to move out. Then break the part of the BF living with you.
2006-12-12 15:36:17 · answer #5 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be straight up with her. tell her that u feel that its time 4 u to move out and start ur own "family".
2006-12-12 15:55:51 · answer #6 · answered by lilmisspriss 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell ur parent's u feel that ur ready 2 be on ur own. Goodluck!
2006-12-12 15:35:38 · answer #7 · answered by aria19_lovely 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you love her and respect her, but that you're an adult now, and need to move out.
2006-12-12 15:36:01 · answer #8 · answered by LSD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋