I am dating a girl and i don't know she is cheating on me?

Question

I think my gf may be cheating on me. I live like an hour away from her. Me in a small town her in the city. during the weekdays i dont hear from her at all she says that she does not have a phone or a computer. This makes sense due to her families economic state. however i am a very jelouse type of guy and every girl in my past which i have dated cheated on me. I guess you could say i have piss poor luck when if comes to dating. anyways though i am curious if she is cheating on me. If anyone can give me advice on how to find this information out it be much appreciated and no smart *** answers part of me feels shes not because she is getting pissed off at me during the weekends cause i am not always able to go visit her. Please Help Is she cheating on me, or am i overreacting and how can i find out if she is for sure?

Answer 1

You know man, I can relate to you. I had a girlfriend when I went to pennstate for a year. I found out later she cheated on me not only once but a few times...who knows if it was more, this is only what she admitted to me. I'm not saying your situation is the same as mine, but you have to be watchful. Look, there is no sense in getting worked up and overly jealous. If your girlfriend is attractive she is going to have guys hit on her and there is nothing you can do about that...ever. You just have to accept it. Her being in a city with a higher population of people around doesn't help. The thing is, you just have to accept your situation, and if you really want to know if she's cheating on you, pay attention to subtle differences, if she's not wanting to make love as much, or is getting more pissy with you for no reason, or she becomes more paranoid that you are going to cheat on her. I think she is not letting you speak to her during the week because she wants her privacy, she might still want her own life. This is not always bad, however. But still, some people can be very ungreatful and will completely abuse the loyalty and trust in a relationship. My exgirlfriend, the one I had when I went to college, she was sleeping around behind my back and was demanding that I come home and see her every weekend. How selfish. Every weekend of my freshmen year of college I devoted to seeing her, I wasted away what social life I could have had, and that year is gone. So basically what I'm trying to say is that the only thing to do in your case is live your life, enjoy it, and stop being that guy that gets suckered. You may have gotten cheated on with all of your past relationships because that's the type of woman you are attracted to. My one friend got cheated on by all of his girlfriends because he was passive and shy and let all of them dominate his life. Don't be that person, please don't. If you feel the girl is being too shady, she's not good enough to be with you. Afterall, what's worse than a girlfriend cheating on you? marrying her, she still cheats on you, then divorces you and takes all of your money.

Answer 2

This is a hard situation; however since you've self admitted that you are a jealous person, you may be driving your girlfriends away. That being said - anyone that is in a relationship needs to be faithful OR get out of the relationship. If you tend to smother, that may be something that you might want to try and calm a little.
Not having a phone or a computer, even in the most bleak of times most people have access to one or both of these - either through friends or otherwise.
I am curious to know how old you are or age range simply because an entire family not having a phone or computer just does not sound right - although it may be.
If you feel she is cheating on you - you can ask.... she may or may not tell you.
If you want to spy on her, please keep in mind that = that is a form of deceit as well.
The best advice I can give without knowing your age or range for situation suggestions is this: Stop by unannounced... see the reaction.
You may also want to decide if you fear this is it more your jealousy, since you are not right near her OR is her lack of communication avenues too much for you to handle. If truth be told, irrespective of what has happened in the past - you need to set a limit of how much you will let something drive you nuts and then decide if the relationship itself is worth that agony.
I was a PI years ago and there are several ways to research a person; however there is not enough information to forumlate any true plan.
I wish you well.
Claire

Answer 3

One critical element of a relationship is trust. A relationship lacking in trust is inherently unhealthy.

Given that - you've already admitted that you're the jealous type. I suffered from that malady for much of my early dating life... and in the process drove away some wonderful women.

If she is upset when you can't visit, I would suspect its because she loves you and misses you. And was looking forward to spending time with you.

Considering that, I doubt she is cheating.

The thing is, there is NO way to ever be sure someone is not cheating on you, unless you spend every minute of every day with them. And even then, for all you know they're fantasizing about someone else.

You've got to keep it in your head (I know how hard this is...) - I'm the jealous type, and if I want her, I've got to trust her...

Its the best anyone can do, particularly the jealous types.

Good luck,

-dh

Answer 4

There is no magic answer for this.
You need to spend time with her or she needs to spend time with you.
Either get her a mobile and contact her often so that you dont feel insecured.
Trust is needed in relationship and so is keeping in touch and contact.
You need to work out something. No miracle is gonna tell you wats going on at her end if u dont go there or contact her.
Lets be practical. In order for you to have a strong trust and feeling in this relationship do something about it to meet often to keep in touch by phone ( phone can actually give some sort of physical presence ).
Trust her. Love is about trust regardless of any past or presence you need to work on it and make it happen for urself.

Answer 5

You are over reacting big time. Stop with the jealousy it is very unattractive. If you cannot trust her you need to end it and be on your own for awhile. You sound like you have some very serious issues with trust so I hope you go and get the help you need. the way you are going now you are gonna scare away anyone that might be interested in you. get help

Answer 6

Ok. Well honestly, if you can't trust due to bad past experiences relationships for you are going to be really REALLY hard. If she wants to spend the weekends with you ; then more than likely she is NOT cheating. If she was she wouldn't care about seeing you on the biggest "party" days. If you are worried about it, just ask her, and if you can't get that out of your head ; seek counseling for your past issues, and maybe you shouldn't ruin her life or yours by hanging on to past issues that you can not change. Just let them go.

Answer 7

if she's not cheating on you by now, she will be, you have piss poor self esteem and women hate that. Apparently you have no trust in her and if you end up tormenting her then you're a monster and need to see a psychiatrist. anyways, good luck.

Answer 8

This is just not working for either of you. You are worrying and wondering and she's whatever. Break this off and find somebody who lives closer to you. It's hard for me to believe that in this day and age nobody's got a phone on her end.

Answer 9

If she is cheating on you or not is not really the problem., The problem is that you do not trust her. no relationship can survive without trust. you need to over come that trust, or move on to a woman that you can trust.
good Luck

Answer 10

She could very well be, STOP being available for her, be busy and see how it makes her feel, Then explain to her why you did it? I f this does not work break up w/ her b4 she hurts you like those other girls have, you are too nice of a guy!