Do you know any really good riddles or jokes?

Question

Do you know any really good riddles or jokes -- i kind of need a laugh right now -- Thanks

Answer 1

ok heres a joke and a riddle :

joke:

there was a black man, and indian and a cowboy,the black man walks into a bar and says give me a coke so the chinese bartender goes and fixes the coke ...... he comes back gives him the coke the black man drinks it then the chinese bartender says
"me chinese ,me play joke me put pee pee in your coke"
the black man walks out

the indian walks in says give me a coke so the chinese bartender goes back gets him a coke .... comes back gives it to him the indian drinks it then the chinese man says "
me chinese ,me play joke me put pee pee in your coke"the indian walks out

the cowbow walks in says give me a coke so the chinese bartender goes back fixes him a coke....comes back gives to the cowboy the cowboy drinks it ....then the chinese man goes"
me chinese,me play joke me put pee pee in your coke"
then the cowboy goes "me cowboy you run fast me put bullet up your asss"


riddle:

as I was walking to Saint Ives i met a man with seven wives and each wife had 7 sacks and in each sack was seven cats and each cat had 7 kittens how many were goin to Saint Ives??

solve that riddle!!!

Answer 2

I have no idea that...however I will let you know this one...! Elton and Ricky Martin have a live performance in Miami South Beach...! All the fondness lodges are complete and so they have got to keep in a low-priced inn. Around nighttime, Ricky referred to as the attendance all dissatisfied and instructed him: " Would you ship a person to my room to exterminate those homosexual roaches...? There are homosexual roaches far and wide the location..! The attendance responded very amazed: No challenge Ricky..."I will ship a person to spray and kill the ones homosexual roaches instantly...But inform me...How the hell you'll be able to inform while roaches are homosexual...?" Ricky responded, "They are all popping out of the closet..."

Answer 3

here is one! hope it helps!
Adopted By the Boston Red Sox


A child custody case was held in court. The judge felt that the mother and father were both fit to be parents and therefore couldn’t decide who he to grant full custody to. So he asks the little boy, “would you like to live with your mother?”

“No”, said the boy.

“Why not?” said the judge

“Because she beats me”

The judge says, “Okay then you’ll go live with your father”

“Oh no”, cried the boy, “He beats me too.”

Dumb founded, the judge asks, “Okay, who do you want to live with?”

“I want to live with the Boston Red Sox”

“Why?” asks the judge.

“They don’t beat anybody”

Answer 4

there is a wall of 15 cm a frog climb 2cm up and slips down 1cm down each day so how many day it will require to climb the wall