Stressing out so much i have nightmares?

Question

I've been stressing out a lot lately. I'm behind in my schoolwork and as i slowly catch up i'm falling behind too. I have to have all my work in by a certain date and I'm worried that I won't get it in. Also my school wants those in my grade to start looking at colleges and careers (I'm in 11th grade). My work is becoming stressful because I never get straight answers from my manager and boss. My parents want me to live my life their way practically. My parents are spoiling my younger brother. My mom is always stressed out because my bro doesn't do as he's told and my older siblings are stressing her out. We recently had a death in the family so my mom is upset. My dad is hardly ever in a happy mood and he's always yelling. I never get a chance to do my chores at home and I'm having horrible nightmares from all this stress. Most of these dreams revolve around death and its scaring me.
Does anyone have any suggestions to help me get through all this?

Also my friend has been having her own problems and I'm her only friend that helps her. The rest of her friends don't help her at all. I'm also losing sleep from these nightmares causing me to be cranky in the mornings. It seems no matter how hard i try to keep things up they just fall down on me.

to those who suggested the bible or praying. I've been doing so but there are times I forget or i'm to tired. I have been having less hours at work to which is helping a little but its still stressful when I go in. Also my school doesn't have a counselor. which sorta stinks.

Answer 1

Hi Hun, Registered Nurse here; You certainely have a great deal to try and manage, more than your share and more than you can say Grace over. Here's a few suggestions, for in Graduate School, I experienced severe stress and to this day, have nightmares when things start pilling up. First, put yourself first, learn to say No, and learn it quickly. Try and put things in priority, #1. Your Physical and Mental Health, without these 2, all other things will fall even futher behind.
#2. School work at present is more important than the future colleges. Now this is a very important step, college, but at the moment, you must concentrate at what's at hand. When you began to have so free time, then you can seriously address college issues. This is at least one and half years away. So you have time.
#3. Have a heart to heart with your boss. Share with him or her, how you feel, and that your not at the best point in your life, and could really use straight forward answers to your questions. Be sure and thank them for their time.
#4. If the talk with the boss isn't productive considering quitting, If this is a possibility, if not look for another job. Sometimes things just cannot be worked out with an employeer and it's for one's mental health just to move on.
#5. How your parents are raising your younger brother, is not your problem. Tell your parents how you feel, if they decide to raise your brother in a manner you don't agree with, they are the parents. Not trying to be rude, but this is a stressor you can easily walk away from and choose not to be part of.
#6. Go to your parents, tell them all the yelling, telling you how to live your life etc. Is bothering you, your having nightmares and you also need there love, support and attention.
#7. For the death in your family, I'm very sorry. These one will just take time to get over, actually not get over, but accept it, and try and remember the good times. And try and think how the family member that passed away would want you to handle there death. I'm guessing they would want you to remember them with a smile and not grieve yourself sick. And finally
#8. Please, Please talk to a school guidance phrofessional.
Thanks for the opportunity to address such a delicate, sensative, and important question. Best of Luck to you, and God Bless.

Answer 2

Hi There- It sounds like you need a common remedy, and its called "TIME FOR YOURSELF!" So listen, I understand you love your mom and you don't like to see her stressing, and surely you love the other siblings (lil spoiled bro') too! The fact is however, that you need some time to just focus on yourself. Now this doesn't mean the spoils of the mall, or shacking up with the bible, but rather taking a long walk or sitting in a quite cafe and thinking to your inner self about your goals.

These may include graduating high school. Also, you surely will start to feel your stress slipping away when you focus on the future. There is defiantly some great opportunities ahead for you, if you can just take deep breathes every once in awhile and think about your goals. The family is not your entire burden.

As for the stressful job, you can see how work effects your father, so try not to let it get under your skin like it has. Work is work is work- you will be doing it forever, unless you have GOALS.

Three things to take away from this ANSWER:
1) Take deep breathes
2) Take time for yourself
3) Take your mind off the have nots and focus on your goals

Stay blessed young lady- and with the bible, your god, spirit and all- just remember the one true guide through this "real world" comes from within you- so don't be to hard on yourself about the dreams. If you dare to struggle, which there will be much of, then you dare to win. See below for some tips to reduce test stress.

Answer 3

Sounds like you are suffering from depression and so is your friend. Over 10% of people in the USA are in the same boat. You need to see a school counselor or your own doctor to talk about this problem. It will not go away by itself. You can do some research on the Internet but you must go for professional help before it gets worse. Tell your friend to do the same. There is no shame in being depressed and the sooner you get professional help, the sooner you will begin to get better and feel like your old self again.

It might be a good idea for you Mom and Dad to get some help also. Sounds like the whole family is feeding off each others depression.

I hope my advice helps you find some happiness in your life and gets you on the right track to recovery.

Answer 4

Ok, if your school doesn't have a counselor you need to find someone else to talk to. It doesn't really sound like your parents are an option right now, but you can't keep these feeling to yourself (I mean you can....but it won't do you any good). Do you trust any of your friends parents? Or have any relatives who live close by or that you could call? Or do you feel like you could trust your teacher? Pretty much anyone you feel comfortable with will be willing to talk to you. It's not at all wierd to feel like this when you get stressed. Anyone you chose to talk to will help you through this ok? You're not alone with anything unless you chose to be. You can always call hopeline http://www.hopeline.com if you need someone, or another hotline. A therapist sounds like a good idea but you might not have time for that right now. Anyway you chose you should talk to someone. If you can try not to dump it on your friends because that will make them feel like you feel with the friend you are helping out -> not good. People are there for you so make sure you take advantage of that. If the dreams are revolving around death again you should try to get a therapist or talk to your doctor. Anyone really, just let it all out. You'll start to feel better imediatly. =)

Answer 5

Don't worry about college till next year... it wouldn't hurt to take your SAT's but other than that, there's not much you can do about it right now, especially if you're not sure what you want to do. Do like the other guy said above here^, concentrate on your school work, and be sure to try and solve one thing at a time. Be sure to take time for yourself too, to do whatever you like to relieve stress... read, draw, paint, whatever. You'll surely feel better when the holidays are over with. Good luck.

Answer 6

You started out good, by making a list. Now, eliminate anything that you cant change from your list, and forget about them. Work on changing the things that you can. Forget about your job, at your age, and with your college plans, the job isn't a factor. Cut your hours back, and concentrate on getting your school work caught up. FOCUS on ONE problem at a time. Many times, by solving one thing, several others will disappear.

Answer 7

O.K. just think about you! if you keep trying to be there, fix it, and juggle the problems of the world, you're going to crack, and i know.
your parents have to take care of themselves. they did before you came along i bet.
the siblings are just that, siblings, not your kids or you. if they are old enough they take care of themselves or your parents are the responsible ones.
get your things in order and work with the biggest problem first. take time to organize your work schedule and still be able to have a least a bit of time for yourself to wind down. sleep will come easier.
don't add to the stress level in the home by arguing and lashing out, try to be calm, do it for you.

Answer 8

Start praying and asking God to protect you in your dreams. I always taught my children if they were having a nightmare to call on Jesus. What ever is trying to torment your mind will have to flee. Do not be in fear. Fear is a tactic of the devil, and he likes to see people in fear. Fear is false evidence appearing real. Be in courage in Jesus name. Start saying out loud "By his stripes (Jesus) I am healed. Do not speak any of your dreams about death, do not believe them. It's not a premoniton.

Also ask God to help work out your promblems, and pray for your family. Try to find quiet time for yourself and listen to music, write and journal your thoughts, read a book.

I don't know if you attend church, it would be a good idea to start attending church. Take every day one day at a time. You're too young to be stressed. God will work everything out for you. I'm sorry to hear about death in your family. With time healing will come.

Answer 9

Let your fears go. Focus on being happy, don't let fear enter your mind, do your best to think about something else. Sing a song. hum. Go la la la like you'd do if your little brother was bothering you but don't let the fears get to you. Fear is the destroyer of worlds.

Answer 10

i nevered had a nightmare for 4 yrs.thank the lord. im 16 by the way. Have the bible next to your bed and read it everyday. say a prayer when you are in trouble. trust in god and jesus because they are always there for you. know that your life will be better because god made sured it will. may god be w/you.