Whats your opinion on "children having children"?

Question

To me (i'm not sure if it's true but by what i've seen) SO many young people are having babies....personally i think a lot of them aren't ready because they haven't gotten out of there getting drunk every weekend stage. And there's so many single parent relationships these days (which isn't a bad thing, my parents divorced so my mother raised us)

Whats your opinion, and if you had a child young, did people talk down to you?? how old were you when you had your first child?

Answer 1

I was 21 when i had my son. I am now 27 and have not yet had anymore kids.
Looking back even though my son was planned i feel like i could have waited. 21 is young to have a baby but i done well very well.

I do not get why a teenage girl just dosen't go and get on birth control if she is going to be having sex. Why can't they use common sense? To the teenage boys how hard is it to use condoms?

I think that parents should be more strict with their teenagers. They shouldn't act like their kids are angels and that they are not having sex even though they claim they aren't.

I think that it is sad for a teenage girl to get pregnant when it could have been prevented either by stricter parents or by a simple visit to a doctor to get on birth control or to use a condom.

Answer 2

15 years ago there were six year olds haveing babies.

Noone seems to notice that or cover that now >.>

Alot of people are under the belief that when they had their first period or when their sister had their first period is the youngest anyone can have a period at,.. and on top of that all these lies and this confusion over when a girl can and cannot get pregnant. It's like that thing used as a joke but that some people believe,.. where they think if you jump up and down you can't get pregnant.

Then in School I noticed that for whatever reason they picked the same kids to take Sex Ed. every year,.. even though it's supposed to be randomly selected,.. then some of them didn't get parents permission or did but to skip the class and then half the people left over might skip constantly. So there is no education. Alot of people think if there is no education there is no sex at all,.. this is not true... especially if you were to look back and see the people not takeing sex ed any year of school in one school system were getting pregnant or someone pregnant like atleast twice a year (lotsa miscarriages).

Now what I'm seeing is all these Grandparents that were teen parents that had teenparents,.. and there is alot of mental problems there,.. much abuse and neglect and everyone for three generations some times puts everything negative and all blame on the current children.... >.> To their face...y abuseively,.. but they don't realize that because of the cycle of abuse and so many forms of abuse spreading.

Answer 3

I think it depends. I watched my parents go through a bad divorce, then helped raise my younger sister. I was mature at 17, even if I was still a stupid kid. I had dated my guy a year before sex and we got preggy our first time. We married and made it work. We now have 3 kids and have been married 9 years. Alot of times I think its more about life experiemce than anything else. My husband is a good guy. Neither of us had a crazy phase or were the party type. He went military (wanted it before we met) and I stay at home with the kids. It worked well for us. Sometimes I think young parents have that much more reason to suceed, just because people expect them to screw it up. We've done well by our kids, irregardless of our ages when we started our family.

Answer 4

Well. I'm 21 and TTC ... my grandmother and her friends think I'm 'a baby TRYING to have a baby'.

But really, my dad was 21 when I was born and they've done well. I don't consider that too young (obviously). It just has to be well-planned, the parents should be married and stable, etc. Everything an older couple should have. People assume that *I* have not gotten past the getting drunk stage ... but I have never been drunk in my LIFE. I won't be a single mom on welfare who trades food stamps for beer. We've thought this out.

People my own age think I should wait for me (they think I need to try getting drunk every weekend) and elderly people think I should wait for the baby (they ended up with 9 kids because they married at 20 and regret it). But in today's world I don't think either view is correct.

People should do what THEY are ready to do. I moved away from home young (15), went to college young (17), graduated from college young (19), got engaged young (20), and I had a real, professional job young (19-21, LASPCA animal control officer and adoption counselor). I also lost everything young (20), when my entire neighborhood was destroyed by Hurricane Katrina. The way I see it, I'm YEARS ahead of most people my age. And if I'm right, and I am 'where' a 26/27-year-old would be ... then why can't I?

I'm mature enough to handle it. I actually have the life experience I'd need, I'm stable, we have enough money, etc.

I HAD planned on working with the SPCA for several years before having kids.

But August 2005 showed me how short life can be. Honestly ... if my fiance died tomorrow, or the world ended, or my parents were in a horrible accident and never got to see grandchildren ... I would seriously regret not having had children. My father almost stayed behind to ride out the storm. My fiance and myself ended up on separate supply boats, because there weren't enough captains for them all and we were the only people left who had any experience navigating. We went (sneaking down the river to bring food for the people who'd stayed behind to guard the marina) back three days after the storm passed, and couldn't tell the river from the land from the bayou from the Gulf. Where our neighborhood used to be! It was nothing. Not even like in New Orleans. Seriously NOTHING.

So you could say I want to have kids because of Hurricane Katrina. But that's not why. I wanted to have kids before I ever saw that destruction. BUT, I thought I had all the time in the world. I thought we had all the time in the world to build our dream home, celebrate holidays with our parents, take my sister to visit colleges, watch my nephew grow up, and figure out what I really wanted to do with my life. And that's not true.

I kind of forced me to think about what I wanted to do. I want to LIVE every day and have some of the things I want before I die. I was raised to believe that striving for what makes you happy is a good goal. My grandmother was one of the first female Marines, even though her mother thought she was too young. My mother moved 1000 miles away from her family at age 19 to marry my father. They both ended up HAPPY! They were following their dreams.

My dreams include having children. And at this point in my life, after everything I've been through, I'm not willing to postpone it.

This child will have loving parents and grandparents, a home, pets, a vibrant rebuilt neighborhood, a good school (my degree is in child psychology; I want to start my own small school), and most importantly, HOPE. I have lots of that to share.

Someone in my position who was depressed, on the other hand, and thinking a baby would love them and make them happy ... that person should NOT be trying to have children, IMO. But that has nothing to do with their age. It is so much more complicated than that.

Answer 5

I had my first at 22. I can't imagine the amount of crap the teenage mothers get, because even at 22, I got a lot. Though I'm not sure if it was because I look so young or because of the absence of a wedding ring. People would make it obvious that they were checking out my ring finger then they'd give me a dirty look. As if they never had pre-marital sex. I do believe that if the mother is still trying to be a carefree irrisponsible party girl, she needs to consider adoption or change her ways before the baby comes.

Answer 6

I had my first child at 18 (pregnant at 17) and my second at 19. I don't think it's anyone else's business. My kids aren't a burden to society, meaning I'm not on welfare. I'm far from single. As far as the drinking thing goes, I HATE to drink. Yea I've tried it and it's not my thing. Some people like to go to parties/concerts/etc on weekends; I like to read for entertainment. If my kids are in bed and their father isn't home, that's what i'm doing. As far as you not thinking a lot of them are ready, do you know each and every young parent? I doubt it so how could you "personally," think every young parent is not ready when you don't "personally," know them.

Answer 7

I think in most instances young people aren't ready to be parents. It is hard enough as a married adult. I can't imagine being a mother at such a young age. I had a few friends that had children as teenagers and they have all had it very hard. It is better to wait until you are in an adult, stable relationship.

Answer 8

as a approaches because of the fact the "paper" is in touch, you're precise. you're in a committed courting, and that's large for the youngsters (they don't look to be illegitimate, and neither are you, IMHO). yet marriage is likewise the dedication that the couple makes to their family contributors, community, and international. it fairly is a dedication a pair makes mutually, to the destiny - over the generations to return - besides because of the fact the present. not something is so universally acknowledged as a married couple. And however all of us know that many many marriages are unhappy, or lead to divorce, there's a splash of selfishness or of doing factor via 0.5-measures while an couple lives as though they're married, yet have not certainly proved themselves to committing to the rest persons.