How can i let my mom down easy?

Question

When i was younger (around 18)i was very thin. Now that i'm older (28) i've gained weight mostly due to i was walking and taking the bus everywhere now i have car, birth control and just working all the time and being to lazy to get out and exercise. So im about 50pds heavier. My mom just found out she's a diabetic and is constitly on me about my weight. Everytime i have any kind of pain, its cause of my weight. when i go to her house i hate eating anything cause she gives me that look. When we talk about it she always breaks down and tells me she dosnt want me to be sick like she is and starts crying. But it just makes me feel so shitty about myself cause i dont think im that big, neither do my friends or bf. I dont have the heart to tell her the reason why i was so skinny is cause from 17-23 I was heavy into drugs and barley ate. in fact 17-23 i dont even remember. so how can i spare mine and hers feelings.

Answer 1

well tell her you know why she's so concerned and you understand and will try to eat better but your doctor says your at a healthy weight and it's not increasing you risk for diabetes it may not be a whole truth if you haven't talked to your doc about it but it will spare feeling and having to dig up old demons

Good luck and God Bless

Answer 2

Well, first, I don't think it's necessary to fill your mother in on your drug years....it's over, you're no longer doing drugs so, spare her that detail. Second, I think that you should talk to her and set some boundaries. I understand that she's sick and it worries her but, to belittle you about your weight is never acceptable. Tell her that you love her and respect her opinion about your health but, your weight is not affecting it and she needs to leave the issue alone. Be honest but be sensitive! Assure her that you will continue to follow up with you physician to be tested for diabetes and you will keep her informed. Also, tell her to consider that now that you are older your metabolism is not as it was when you were younger, you're on birth control which causes women to have weight gain and because of your job, you do not have the free time you once did to walk. If you freely confess that you are lazy, maybe you can take a more proactive roll in your health and dedicate a few hours a week to a simple exercise program? Maybe that will do both of you some good. It can ease your mother's worry as well as improve your overall health, stamina and weight. Good luck Sweety...things will all be OK as long as you are honest with your mother and set some loving boundaries with her as well as yourself. Happy Holidays!!

Answer 3

Don't tell her about the drugs!!!! that would devastate her and cause far more problems than you have now

She obviously loves you judging by what you've said, i too am about 50 or so pounds overweight and have been for a very long time and I'm all ways going to doctors & have been for a long time and they have never said a word about it, BUT diabeties can be very nasty and it run in familys so get used to your mom nagging you about what you eat especially sugar and foods that metabolize into sugar like POTATOES white bread and white rice and CORN.

i spent several years healping a good friend and his wife after the doctors had to amputate his foot! then half his leg and then most of the rest of his leg ALL because of diabeties and guess what I have just been diagnosed with diabeties and insulin resistance now i have to dramaticaly change my diet and my doctor doctor is REALLY ragging on me to loose weight too.

if you truly want to eas the tensions with you and your mom try to learn more about diabeties and when you are with her try to eat the right type of foods that are not bad for diabetics, she will worry less and you could benefit too

Good luck, Tom AL USA

Answer 4

Well to keep your mom happy show her you are eating healthy and tell her about your younger years of drugs, explain to her you are over those years and understand what those things do to you.She is just worried about you because she loves you, if she sees that you are eating right and trying to stay healthy she will feel better but she will always worry about you because she is your mom.

Answer 5

sounds like she's afraid you'll inherit her disease of being a diabetic and she's just being a mother - mother's always seem to find fault with their daughters, anyway - it's born in them. i would just say - mom, this is my body and what i put into it is my business - and you know what, when i look in the mirror i don't see a big person - but i see a healthy woman and a boyfriend who likes what he sees - so please, if you don't like the way i look or eat, please keep it to yourself - because this is my life and i'm happy with it but every time i see you, you pull me down and i just don't want to hear it any more. if you can't say nice things about me, then just don't say anything.just accept me for the way i am - you not helping me by the looks you give when i am trying to enjoy something to eat or the words you keep repeating over and over to me. i feel fine, i am fine and just want you to allow me to be ME.

Answer 6

you haven't let all and dissimilar down. we attempt very demanding to delight our dad and mom, because their love is had to us, and we like them. alongside with this love, dad and mom have hopes, targets, and expectancies for our youthful ones. a number of those will adventure what our youthful ones choose, and some received't. complications can get up at the same time as a be certain mixes up hopes and targets with an expectation. to illustrate, my mom needed me to be a criminal specialist, and he or she did her purely right to push me into it. no longer something adversarial to attorneys, yet I had no favor to be one. i had to bypass into the clinical field. It led to many arguments and a good type of rigidity. It replaced into complicated to comprehend why. It wasn't like i replaced into attempting to be a monetary employer robber or something worse. contained eventually, she were given over it, and that i'm chuffed contained in the clinical field. You state you're bisexual, then you say you're afraid you're a lesbian, then you say you're nevertheless drawn to adult males. in accordance on your statements, i imagine you're not to any extent further particular what you're. i'm assuming you're a somewhat youthful female, and it truly is not unusual for this manner of uncertainty to take position. it may take time to be certain out our alternatives. per chance, for now, you need to ward off annoying about what "label" you need to positioned on your self. In time, you'll study extra about what your orientation is, and also you could also make some significant judgements. virtually each and every be certain assumes their little ones will meet someone of the different sex, fall in love, get married, and function little ones. there isn't any longer something incorrect with this, yet as i'm particular you comprehend, it doesn't continually go that way. on occasion, i imagine a youthful persons sexual orientation ought to nicely be fairly obtrusive somewhat early in existence, and typically it truly is not. at the same time as it hasn't been so obtrusive, i imagine it ought to nicely be a touch bit a wonder to a be certain. this can take position on your mom's case, and he or she ought to ought to handle it. you shouldn't positioned stress on your self by annoying about how she will act. It received't replace something, and it truly is going to nevertheless be your mom's duty to reply in an appropriate way

Answer 7

Tough one. "Mom, I appreciate your concern and understand why, but you need to calm down. Just because I'm overweight doesn't mean I'm not healthy. You have to stop obsessing over my weight. It is NOT helping me keep myself healthy. Please, we need to work together on this. I know you want to help, but you aren't, so let's talk about what I need from you and what I don't."

Explain that the best way to show she cares is to stop the madness.

Answer 8

She is mom...and has every right to be critical of you when you eat or do anything else for that matter. Get over it...and start walking more!

Answer 9

This is not possible! Read your question, then tell me it's believeable

Answer 10

Tell her you love her.