How Do I get my daughter to start taking things alittle bit more serious?

Question

My daughter is seven, I know she is young, but I have been trying to teach her things on what a little girl should be like. Cleaning her room, taking school serious, having manners. Do you think she is too young to learn this? How would I go about teaching her better?

Answer 1

Ok my son just turned 8 so there is a lot they can do at this age. Make their bed, clean their room, bring out the dirty clothes, put away their clean clothes, unload the dishwasher, help fold towels, dust the furniture (don't expect perfection), etc.

So here is what to do, first lead by example. If you want her to clean her room go in and help her. Show her what you expect but make her do it with you. Eventually get to where you do less cleaning and just direct. Then you don't do anything.

It takes 30 days to make a habit, so start helping her make her bed every morning. Once you show her she can do it, stand and talk to her or get her clothes out while she does it. Do it everyday.

For manners, turn off the tv during dinner. Sit at the table. Show her what you expect. Napkins in lap, passing food, please, thank you, may I be excused...etc...

Let her see you using your manners out and about Yes Ma'am No Sir, please, thank you, excuse me... If she doesn't use them, quietly correct her.

Doing better in school. No play or tv or phone until her homework is done. You can't watch tv either. Sit at the kitchen table to do homework every night. She could do this while you cook dinner or fold laundry. That way you are right there if she gets off track or needs help.

The biggest thing is be consistant. And be sure you and your spouse are on the same page,

Good Luck!!

Answer 2

Actually, you're asking 2 things here. I think 7 is way too early to take life seriouslly. She's still a little kid and life should still be about having as much fun as she can humanly handle.

The second question: Yes, she is old enough to learn responsibility. There are 2 schools of thought (ok, heck of a lot more than 2, but humor me). Responsibility can be taught by example or reward. Seems to me teaching by example is a slow and painful process that could take years to sink in. Reward is a whole nother country (so to speak). Clean your room, do your homework, take out the trash, vacuum the hall, and help in the kitchen - all freakin week - and the weekend is 2 hours at Chuck E. Cheese. As she gets older, switch to cash. Cash and teens are a rewarding combination.

Answer 3

I'm not really sure what to tell you. My daughter has cleaned her own room by herself since she was 3.(she's 5 now) She has had manner's ever since she could talk it's always been yes please or no thank you.

It's going to be hard to start teaching her these thing's now but you have to stick to your guns. If you tell her to do something like pick up her toy's make her do it. If she doesn't take her toy's for a day or two. When it comes to school make sure she knows your serious about her school and if she doesn't do what she's supposed to do that there will be consequences. Good luck!

Answer 4

I have been sort of a tomboy, clown my whole like. When i am with my parents, I feel comfortable, but if people are around or I out somewhere, I knew how i should be acting. I still have trouble keeping my room clean and even in college I still put things off until the last minute. I still made it . I am married to a clean freak, we have 5 boys and I have a great career. Don't break her spirit or try to change her personality. I am most organized with disorganization. I always know where things are, what I'm doing and I don't live in filth (even without my husband). You can teach her all that. She is listening, but she still going to be her own person. Like it or not. I bet she's fun to be around! enjoy her. Things somehow fall into place if you are setting great examples for her.

Answer 5

Hey dont feel bad ,I see these people saying it should have been started years ago , well easier said then done it is hard to al;ways stick to your guns when they are so little and cute I am going through the same thing with my eight year old her room is a mess as we speak and i am getting ready to go clean it, I have even gotton rid of most of her toys but yet clothes are strung everywhere. I was doing a chore chart and a behavior chart I went to my search engine and put in kids chore charts and printed one up and for the behavior chart I went to www.easychild.com (but i also found it through a search engine too~ now it is for ADHD kids but it also worked for her for the behavior chart if she scored between 28-30 points she got a quater for the next day at school for a pencil or eraser at school (for example) so that was for an immediate award now the chores she got a quater for doing each one but she had to wait for sat to get paid so she also learned patients NOW all this worked until I started slacking (I am only home 2 hrs before i go to work and 1hr is getting ready for work~ and her dad is great but he is still adjusting to watching them!)
Hope this helped a little sorry about it being so long

Answer 6

I'm sorry but I agree with others you should have started this years ago. Even a two year old should know how to hold a fork and not to do certain things at the table. Or at least my children did by then.

But, don't give up. It's not too late. Just simply state to your daughter what you expect of her. Get right down into her face [don't be threatening] and tell her calmly that you expect her to have her room clean by a certain time. Don't yell, it does nothing trust me. Whatever it is that you expect of her just tell her. Maybe she doesn't understand it, in that case have her tell you back what you just said. I do that with my 8 yr old. I tell him what I want then I have him repeat it back to me so that we both understand what's going on.

I hope this helps you. Even though it would have been easier earlier on but it's not too late. Oh, and offer lots of praise. When I give my son praise his face just lights up with pride. So maybe that would be good too.

Good Luck!

Answer 7

Your only worrying about this now. No offence but those traits should have been nailed on the head as soon as the child starts being mobile and talking. If they can understand what you say they can understand your rules you just have to stick to them. Maybe she's rebelling against you for something. Resolve any problems you may be having and discuss your issues with her don't yell at her. You'll find she listens better on a normal mature level.

Answer 8

Never too late to start this. (Though I would say cleaning is something for guys and girls to learn.)

At first work with her. Tell you you are going to clean and organize her room and then go up and work on it together. Be sure to include her in decisions and actions. Ask her where she wants things.

If you use manners with her, she will use them with you and others. Say please and thank you to her when she does things. Explain why manners are important and prompt her to use them. Even now with my boys who are teenagers, I won't do things for them unless they say please and I may prompt them in a warm fashion for that.

For school work, have her do it at the table with you around. Read the paper or a book, prepare your own bills, wash dishes...something that keeps you legitimatly nearby.

Answer 9

when she demands something, ignore until she says please. sundays or saturdays are for cleaning her room, and after a few long cleaning days she'll pick her stuff up when she's done with it, so she can do fun stuff.

fail a test or dont turn in hw then something is taken away. no tv or friends or computer until hw is done, and you need to see it finished. also see if she has a planner.

i wouldnt say good little girls do this, b/c when i was 7 i didnt want to hear about good little girls. I wanted to play with my buddies-all boys.

let her be herself, and teach manners, by using them yourself.

Answer 10

No, she's not too young to learn responsibility. Teach her by rewarding her good behaviour and disciplining the bad (and being consistent with both...).