I was with Sara for three months and decided it was moving way to fast. She was already moving in. She and I are now together again. I leave for the Navy in a month and don't know how to break it off. I am scared to have a long distance relationship and don't want to tear her heart like I did the first time. I am starting to feel the way I did when I first broke up with her. I feel like she is smothering me and don't give me space. What do I do or how can we talk it out?
2006-12-12 04:24:22 · 12 answers · asked by danvil11 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You should have learned your lesson the first time. This is why I don't get "back together" with people I have broken-up with or vice-versa. Now you are stuck between a rock and a hard place.
All I can say is that if you don't want her at home pining for you while you are deployed you better break it off before then, otherwise she will expect you to be coming home to her, or you have to break-up over the phone which, IMO, is SUPER-shady.
The catch-22 in this situation is that it's kind of shady to break-up with someone within the 2 weeks before the holidays. I would probably either do it tonight or tomorrow, or wait until after the new year.
One more point, if and when you break it off don't beat around the bush or lie about it. Tell her you just don't see it working out between the two of you. Don't make up some shady excuse like "I like you, but I just don't want a long-distance relationship." or "I want to be able to see other people." etc. Telling her something other than the truth may still make her think there is a chance once you come home.
2006-12-12 08:16:58 · answer #1 · answered by Laura 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm just wondering if you told her that she was smothering you. If she was moving in after 3 months and you thought it was moving too fast, did you tell her then. You said you were leaving for the Navy soon, so maybe she wants things to move faster because you'll be leaving. I think the best thing to do would be to just tell her that you don't feel like you can handle a long distance relationship right now. If you really don't want to break it off but you are worried about having a long distance relationship and the 'smothering" then it sounds like you should talk it out with her. I would suggest you tell her exactly how you feel about her not giving you enough space and anything else bothering you, but maybe ask her why she is not giving you the space you need. She may be worried about you leaving and she could feel like she needs to spend as much time with you as possible before you leave.
2006-12-12 12:56:18 · answer #2 · answered by angelicasongs 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No easy way out mate. You gonna have to break her heart again. Let this be a lesson to all the girls out there who think moving on way too fast can secure you a man for ever.
2006-12-12 12:27:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to just let her know how you feel. just sit down and tell her that you feel like you guys are moving way to fast and that you need a break cause you are getting ready to leave and you don't want to hurt her or your self with a long distance relationship. Good luck!
2006-12-12 12:29:17 · answer #4 · answered by Barbara B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Man, get your balls from her purse and attach them where they belong. Tell her staight out that you are done with her. You need to teach her a listen so she wont do this sort of thing to her next relantionship and get hurt again. You will be doing such a good favor even it does not look it right now. In the long term, this will be the greatest gift you ever gave her.
2006-12-12 12:30:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dear Dan, Just be honest with her. Break ups are never easy. It wouldn't be fair to her to have her sitting around waiting for your return. If it's meant to be you two will pick up where you left off when you get back. By the way, Thanks for all your doing for Our Country!!! God Bless.
2006-12-12 12:35:21 · answer #6 · answered by autumn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what you need to just be honest with her and have a heart to heart talk....no easy ways out...Its better to do it now than hurt her more later....She will hurt thats normal but the sooner you do it the better off she will be....She deserves to be happy and if your not feeling her than let her go so she can find someone who will be into her like she deserves....But BE HONEST!!
2006-12-12 12:29:24 · answer #7 · answered by Mamiinkcmo 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just get it over with and let the poor girl free.
2006-12-12 12:44:24 · answer #8 · answered by lavendergirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell her you need space, like everyone else you should have time to your self and so should she... just sit down and talk to her about everything tell her you dont want to hurt her b/c you do care about her but you cant be smotherd
2006-12-12 12:27:44 · answer #9 · answered by cade 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just do it and move on. the longer you wait the harder it will be.
2006-12-12 12:26:56 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋