my sister in law wants to have another baby but the thing is she cant o anything with the one she has for example she called me last night to ask if i could watch her daughter over night so she could wrap christmas presents and they dont spend hardly any time with her. i have 3 hildren and i can wrap gifts when my kids are home with me!!! am i overreacting or what??
2006-12-12 02:52:20 · 16 answers · asked by rebecca v 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Not at all - women want babies, not children. Women love babies until they develop a personality and then it's all over.
2006-12-12 02:55:41 · answer #1 · answered by needsumthin2002 3 · 5⤊ 3⤋
No, you are not over reacting. I have a 13 year old and a 2.5 year old and I wrap gifts while one is at school and the other takes a nap. I may only get one or two done at a time but it will get done.
Now, if she never, ever gets time away from her child she might just want to get this done during rare quiet time. If this is the case, let your kids enjoy their cousin for a few hours and then ask your SIL to do the same for you.
2006-12-12 03:32:14 · answer #2 · answered by AlongthePemi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you oughtta let her watch your 3 kids for a week while you go on a trip or something... that'll make her realize that she's not ready for another baby. I have one that I do a really good job with... I think that I'm a really good mom but I know that I wouldn't be able to do the same at this point if I had another child... your sister in law needs to learn her limit and think about what is best for her child, if she's not able to give her daughter the attention that she needs right now, then she is not ready for another baby.
2006-12-12 03:45:51 · answer #3 · answered by Mel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand about wanting some alone time, but come on. You are not overreacting. Just tell her sorry but you need some alone time also. And I agree with the other person, some woman like babies, not children. They get alot of attention when they are pregnant, and they thrive on that. It is exciting to them, because they are bored and cant think of a better way of full fulling their selfish boredom.
My ex SIL whom i used to still get along with, would push her kids on me at Halloween. I would invite her to take her kids trick or treating with us, instead she would say she was tired or busy, and send her kids to my house. I couldnt say no to the children because I felt sorry for them.
Her kids are both younger than my youngest and I am a single mom with 4 young children. She is married with only 2 kids and if it weren't for her husband they would never know what grass was. She makes her husband pay for daycare, so she can sit at home alone. Supposedly to clean the house and run errands, but she is always sleeping and the house is a mess. Then has the audacity to talk about me when I am working 30 hours a week, going to college 16 hours and taking care of 4 kids, on my own because her brother is a piece of crappola.
Thanks for letting me vent...
2006-12-12 03:09:33 · answer #4 · answered by Mystie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she doesn't want her kid to see what she's getting for Christmas??
My husband always takes my children out when I am wrapping THEIR gifts. But I wrap others when they are home.
My sister in law is the same way, though. She has 2 kids and one on the way and she can't do a thing with the one's she has. Her kids are 12, 7 and one on the way. It's going to be crazy at her house! :)
2006-12-12 03:52:24 · answer #5 · answered by Jessie P 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not over-reacting. Women love babies, but they don't want to deal with all the stress of having one. Afterall, that's why when you don't have one, it's fun to just play with others, but at the end of the night, you can go home to a quiet home with no baby responsibilities. =)
But I would be frustrated if I were in your shoes because it sounds like she is just looking for an excuse to be "baby-free" for a couple of hours so she can have her "alone" time.
The best solution is to help her realize that you are able to balance 3 kids as well as doing the everyday tasks. Give her tips on how to multi-task. It can help her become a better mother and you won't feel as frustrated because she won't need you to watch your niece as often.
Good luck!
2006-12-12 03:13:52 · answer #6 · answered by bosnjgal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your sister doesn't really know what it means to parent a child....there's a difference between having a child and parenting a child, and she seems to want you to do the parenting. If this is a one time occurance, that would be one thing, but from your frustration, it seems like a lifestyle. To bring another child into the world would probably not be the best of ideas. Children need to be nurtured in the parent-child relationship, and that doesn't seem to be happening here.
2006-12-12 03:03:06 · answer #7 · answered by Lacta-intactivist Mama! 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
REMEMBER that she is probably not nearly as efficient as you and she has not had this child very long, I Imagine. You are probably close enough to her to make a difference in her life. Counsel her in your area of expertise... Raising Children. She evidentally needs some help. There is no training manual that comes with children. We have to be trained either by experience or by those around us. If you care about your niece, PLEASE BEGIN counseling her on this. Have a great holiday season. Ho, Ho, HO!!
Santa, Jr
2006-12-12 03:17:38 · answer #8 · answered by Eds 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just start saying you're busy. give her a taste of full time parenting. when my little ones were little i either involved them in the activity or waited until they were asleep, it's no big deal.
i had a neighbor who had 3.5 (the .5 is the one he had with an ex so only part time) babies, he was ALWAYS trying to pawn them off on me so he could go to he bar whilst his wife was working and... ahem.... do the bar scene. don't be a sucker.
2006-12-12 03:26:18 · answer #9 · answered by nanabooboo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can see why she wouldn't want her daughter there when wrapping xmas presents, but that's a bit strong. Just put her daughter to bed
2006-12-12 02:57:19 · answer #10 · answered by JASNJ 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're not overreacting. Simply tell her you plan on moving to another state pretty soon (don't tell her why). I think she'll rethink the "wanting another baby issue".
2006-12-12 03:01:33 · answer #11 · answered by Eccentric_fly 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋