Men are complicated, if you give him space he'll find someone else to fill that space with, but don't be too clingy or he'll be spooked.
2006-12-12 00:47:08 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Men are easy!
Just be with them.
Don't push.
Just be there when they want to talk.
If they don't want to talk, just be there.
If you can do that, I'll fall in love with you and I've been married for 37 years!
It might not work with teens, but it really does with adult men.
2006-12-12 00:57:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
No men are simple. You just by nature it sounds like want to be close all the time which is cool up until you want to have a few beers with your friends and just relax. If you think that you are bugging him and you start to stay away his mind starts to run with a lot of things so he loses interest like you say. See simple just be you and if he says he wants to go have some drinks with his friends and didn't ask you to come along don't take it personally. Were as women make no sense they will be upset about things like this for example that you have no way of guessing that there is a problem. and when you in concern say whats wrong honey? they reply "nothing I am fine" but your not and then you have to either spend the next month and a half try ing to figure out things like the why don't you talk as much any more or my favorite do you have to play pool all the time? lol
Just say what you mean don't make me guess. So what I am trying to tell you is say directly I want to spend tonight together or I want to go out with my friends tonight. and one more thing not in the middle of the get in the door rush or in the middle of the why don't you nag cause I don't know about other guys but I can zone out in about 5 seconds flat so that would be a bad place to put something important.
2006-12-12 01:01:15 · answer #2 · answered by Bleed the Freak 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Seriously, this is a tough situation. As with all relationships, the people involved all have different perceptions about what the relationship is about. Unless you have super powers, you will never quite be able to guess what the other person wants. So my best advice would be to be open with each other and talk about it. If he feels you are too clingy, let him tell you and discuss with you and work something out.
Most often than not, though, guys are just making excuses and you may want to reconsider if the relationship is really what it seems.
2006-12-12 00:50:35 · answer #3 · answered by bluefossil 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is always a reaction to an action, right? the majority of people want what they can't or don't have, it's just human nature. Acting alittle aloof or indifferent to this guy may be what he needs to step back and think "hey, i really like this girl, and suddenly she's backing off...i need to treat her differently" Most girls are way more emotional and clingy than men, you need to think more like a guy. Take the emotion out of it! (Even though it's hard!) It's also possible that you backing off will free him up to say "I'm outta here", but if that's the case, he was going to do it no matter what you did.
2006-12-12 00:54:50 · answer #4 · answered by kayzee 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Here's how it works... find a guy who feels the same way as you do. Some girls are accused of being "clingy" when really the only "problem" is that they want more out of the relationship than the guy does.
So, when you're looking for a boyfriend, talk to your potential suitors about what they are looking for in a relationship and what they want out of a girlfriend. Do they want someone that will be there on their arm 24/7? Or do they want someone to call up a couple times a week and maybe take out once or twice a month? Then, find a guy whose concept of "dating" is the same as yours. You'll be much happier, because both your and his needs will be met, and he won't ever accuse you of being "clingy"
2006-12-12 00:51:00 · answer #5 · answered by wnk 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
There's gotta be a good balance. Don't let him know he's got you. Men like the chase, it's a challenge. Even if we don't like to admit it, dating is like a game. Men are thrown off and confused when a woman doesn't want to get close emotionally right away. Most men are used to clingy chicks.
2006-12-12 00:52:29 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Spoil that guy! Not too many women believe this, but look at the long relationships you know and tell me the man isn't spoiled! They love it. Clingy, NO, caring...yes. Clingy means control over where he goes, what he does and with who. Caring is saying you care, speaking the words that they understand.
Men are not complicated at all. They need to hear it from you how you feel. Don't we all need that?
Read Dr. Gray's book "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars". This should be required reading for all singles.
2006-12-12 00:51:50 · answer #7 · answered by Barbara 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
The only piece of advice that I can offer is:
Be yourself. That is all you can do. You don't need to spend every waking moment with your bf but do give equal time to yourself, to him, and to your girlfriends. You need time to pamper yourself and have that quiet "alone" time. Then, there is your man, you don't need to be too needy/clingy. He found something in you that attracted him to you so work with it. You can't make yourself available to him always...if you already have plans with your girlfriends then be with your gf's BUT one thing always helps....when you say you have other plans make sure to make plans with him for later in the evening or the following day so he does still feel important because he is. Sometimes it is ok to include him, it is ok for him to see how you are with your gf's. I hope I helped a little bit. This will give him that little bit of chase that all guys need to keep them around. If you give in totally then they will get bored or worse spooked.
2006-12-12 00:58:20 · answer #8 · answered by LaReyna 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think us women are like that too. We don't want someone around ALL the time watching our every move. But, we don't want someone who is extremely distant either. Just do what feels naturally to you. If you like to do things together then do them together. But, always remember that everyone needs their space occasionally. If he seems kinda' quiet and you feel uncomfortable go do something on your own for a bit. Just don't worry excessively about it or you will drive him (and yourself) crazy! Lol.
2006-12-12 00:54:01 · answer #9 · answered by SchrodingersTigress 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Relationships are a delicate balance - the good news is that when you meet the right person, you get to be yourself, and that will be the right amount of space for them.
Have patience, and above all things BE YOURSELF! If you want to call - call, if you don't - don't.
Good luck!
2006-12-12 00:49:13 · answer #10 · answered by Jabo the Wise 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋