An an ex boyfriend of mine and I have just broken up yesterday as I don't think he was appreciating me as much as he should do. One minuted we are commited the other minute he is not to sure if he wants that type of commitment right now in his life, but cares alot for me. When we do break up for a couple of days he always calls me to say that he does want to keep seeing each other, and then could change his mind again. Very fickle!! Where not on bad terms but I just want some time to myself to move on really, I wanted to say goodbye all together when he told me this, but does not want to allow this and says that he will be deeply and extremely sad if we were to let what had be destroyed and that he still wants to remain close, even as friends. But I feel that he will only have a renewed and stronger appreciation for me if we spend time apart. As they say absence makes the heart grow fonder.. what do you think?
2006-12-11 23:11:55 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It sounds like the typical breaking up process. I think the "absence making the heart grow fonder" phrase applies best to a committed couple who are apart for reasons that they cannot help (like military, work, etc.), not because they broke up a hundred times.
2006-12-11 23:14:55 · answer #1 · answered by SlapHappy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is still early in the breakup. Besides wondering if he cares for you or misses you, try being away from him completely. No texting, calling on either of your part, complete abstinence. Go out with your friends, try to keep busy. Whatever you do, do not call him. If you find you want to talk to him, do so. You need to sit down and talk out your feelings for each other. When he realizes you are not talking to him in any shape or form and are out doing your thing, he may come around. And when he does, lay down your terms as to what you want or don't want in a relationship. If he can accept your terms, then great. If not, just go out and have a ball. Or maybe see him a couple of nights a week and the rest of the week is yours and yours only. Really think hard about this relationship and see if this is where you want to be. If not, go out and date others. When he sees you are doing this, and you are not his beck and call, he will come running. Because now you are in control, not him. See how he likes it. You are not a puppet on a string. I wish you luck.
2006-12-12 07:26:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'd say u should take a break, not calls or texts and see how u feel after a couple of months. He sounds like either a game player or very confused. either way, time apart might make him appreciate u more, but make sure there is no contact at all. let him see what itd be like to lose u for real, u might surprise urself and see u dont need him!
2006-12-12 07:17:04 · answer #3 · answered by clare 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure you test the water well!!! Your future and that of a future family could be hurt badly.
My suggestion is that you need find someone that is committed! If a man is committed he will go through anything with you and NOT put you down! but will encourage you and guide you. If a man/woman is unsettled in life and has no back bone, you will be miserable!
"A double minded man is unstable in ALL his ways" James 1:8
2006-12-12 07:20:58 · answer #4 · answered by groveton_32 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Difficult, this. They also say 'out of sight, out of mind'. You should have a better motive for spending time apart besides trying to make him want you more. It sometimes doesn't work that way.
2006-12-12 07:17:39 · answer #5 · answered by lou b 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Out of sight, out of mind.
2006-12-12 07:18:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes its does if u love and care abt that person
2006-12-12 07:15:26 · answer #7 · answered by indian beauty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it does.....but sometimes it makes it forget!
2006-12-12 07:14:32 · answer #8 · answered by Mrs. T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not in everyone case :)
2006-12-12 07:13:39 · answer #9 · answered by mysweetart18 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋