BEER TROUBLESHOOTING
SYMPTOM: “My beer seems crystal-clear.”
FAULT: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up.
ACTION: Punch him
SYMPTOM: “I don't recognize anyone, I don't recognize the room I’m in.”
FAULT: You've wandered into the wrong party.
ACTION: Go see if they have free beer.
SYMPTOM:” My feet are cold and wet.”
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.
SYMPTOM: “My feet are warm and wet.”
FAULT: You’ve pissed your pants.
ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.
SYMPTOM: “That’s funny, the opposite wall is covered with fluorescent lights.”
FAULT: You have fallen over backwards.
ACTION: Stop staring at the ceiling, get off your @ss.
SYMPTOM: “Where’d these cigarette butts in my mouth come from?”
FAULT: This time you have fallen forward.
ACTION: Tell your friends you’ve lost a contact lens. Get up!
SYMPTOM: “This beer’s tasteless & the front of my shirt’s wet.”
FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.
SYMPTOM: “Whoa, cool, the floor’s moving!”
FAULT: No, you are not ‘moonwalking’ , you’re being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.
SYMPTOM: “Now everyone’s looking up at me & smiling.”
FAULT: You are dancing on the table again.
ACTION: “Get off before you break into karaoke.
SYMPTOM: “Woa, I’ve never been singing this good in my life!”
FAULT: Ease off on the beer.
ACTION: Did I just not tell you to get off the table!!!
SYMPTOM: “I can't remember the words to this next song.”
FAULT: Beer is just right.
ACTION: Play air guitar.
2006-12-11 22:22:13 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
i loved it!!! Made me laugh soooooooo hard!!!
2006-12-11 22:25:40 · answer #1 · answered by Nicky 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
think u forgot these:
SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark.
FAULT: Bar has closed.
ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.
SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures.
FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations.
ACTION: Cover mouth.
2006-12-12 07:02:52 · answer #2 · answered by Blah Blah 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Saw something like this on the site with the redneck jokes; you presented it better, though.
2006-12-12 06:45:46 · answer #3 · answered by blazing_truesdale 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am sure to pass this one on....2, 2 Funny!!!
2006-12-12 06:47:30 · answer #4 · answered by ~babes~ 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sounds good to me i need some
2006-12-12 06:25:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I love it!!
soooo true!!
2006-12-12 06:24:12 · answer #6 · answered by bekka 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i love it!
beer here!
2006-12-12 06:27:53 · answer #7 · answered by dianka(â?ªis a kidâ?ª)â?¢ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
that's good
2006-12-12 06:24:51 · answer #8 · answered by Sonu G 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i love it.... i give you 9.5/10... love it ... love it
2006-12-12 08:48:08 · answer #9 · answered by wengkuen 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL. LOL.
2006-12-12 18:22:15 · answer #10 · answered by jfmm 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋