My boyfriend sometimes get insecure about our relationship. I tell him he's sexy/handsome and there is no other man I want. But he is always saying that he doesn't deserve me or I'm too pretty to be with him, that I can do better than him. I'm trying to get him to understand that I don't care about the other guys thats trying to holla at me, all I care and all I want is him. How can I make him realize this?
2006-12-11 13:37:21 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You can't. He has a confidence/low self esteem problem that really only he can deal with. The best you can do is be understanding and supportive of him and perhaps, in time, he'll come around.
2006-12-11 13:41:11 · answer #1 · answered by Vince 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take your too pretty, can do better *** out the door. Tell him he's right, that should throw him for a loop. There is nothing more disgusting than an insecure man. Sure, it's nice to hear things like that once in a while but; all the time, please. You shouldnt' have to reassure him all the time. His insecurity is his problem, not yours. He's never going to stop. Put your foot down and tell him it's unacceptable. Tell him the only reason you'd leave him is because he is insecure and doesn't trust you.
2006-12-11 21:42:32 · answer #2 · answered by bellbottombleus 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Schedule a special date, and beforehand, really think about what you want to say. You can tell him nice things, complement him, and tell him what you see when you see him. Ask him what he sees in you other than appearance. That will tell you where you are in your relationship, and where to start improving. All that matters is what is on the inside of the both of you.
To add-if this insecurity resumes, you really need to talk to him. Get counsellers and talk about behavior. ask if he's ever been on medication. That's a good place to start. Good luck!
2006-12-11 21:44:51 · answer #3 · answered by leann6560 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him, that's what you like about him the most. That he's not a stuck-up, conceited, manho playa. You admire his modesty dispite his epic manliness and good looks. That you feel lucky to be his and his alone. Then look in his eyes and kiss him.
Every time he brings it up ... just look into his eyes and kiss him. You'll own him. Be glad that you've found someone that values you. Eventually he'll grow out of his insecurities. It takes time to build up trust, sometimes years.
Its really not really a problem, unless his insecurtities lead into him being possesive or controlling.
2006-12-11 21:53:36 · answer #4 · answered by AnswerGuy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Focus on becoming the woman that God created YOU to be and then you will attract the kind of man that this sort of stuff does not bother. Get involved in a good youth group and have FUN with life...worry more about what GOD thinks than this guy.
2006-12-11 21:51:13 · answer #5 · answered by Wisconsin Scuba Gal 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he continues….. escalate it…… go out with some of your girlfriends or something and put him in the dark a little. When he complains tell him you're tired of hearing him say bad things about you (its a reverse). Stop…. or you will seek someone else who doesn't complain about the relationship. (And that's the key don't say likes me more or appreciates me more….. but won't complain).
Hopefully he'll get the hint and realize if he continues down this path it will go against them. He has to substitute this doubt with trust and become more mature.
Mark
Author GirlsTellAll
2006-12-11 21:47:55 · answer #6 · answered by GirlsTellAll.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you feel like this relationship is going to be worth your life time, the I suggest you start counseling NOW!!! Your boyfriend has issues, like low self esteem and confidence, I don't know but, for sure there are issues. Its never to early for counseling. Do it before you get pregnant and bring a child into a dysfunctional life. Good luck!!
2006-12-11 21:44:34 · answer #7 · answered by Wonderer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can not help a man understand you. They are stubborn creatures and they only get it when they want to. It sometimes takes drastic things to happen before they get it. My "man" did not get it until he ran through fifty more women within two months. Then he wants me in his life. THats really funny huh. I guess when they get it all out their system, if your still available then hey, if not then live the relationship as what it is and let him do him until he come around
2006-12-11 21:43:21 · answer #8 · answered by curious1 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes it doesnt take YOU to make him understand or realize that, you just have to let him know you are there for him and that you will help him become a stronger man (self-esteem) just stay by his side, tell him you love him, text him every so often, send him an e-mail, sometimes its the small things that count ;-)
2006-12-11 21:40:59 · answer #9 · answered by cbitovich 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If other guys are hitting on you, that would probably make him uncomfortable especially if he feels like your out of his league. To him, you could just slip right out of his fingers and he doesn't even own a pair of supergrip gloves. For this type, you're going to have to do something drastic to prove it to him. If you're serious enough about him, say "I wanna have your babies someday" while crawling over him to kiss him. You have to put him on a pedalstool in ways that matter to you and make him feel good. Be affection in public (around other guys to lay the line down) Just a little smooch on the cheek or something will do. Make him feel like he's the only one who could ever make you happy.
2006-12-11 21:48:15 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋