ive been talking to some guy 4 about 2 months and i wann know wats up im not trying to rush anything but i wanna know wat are his intentions w/ me like if his trying to get serious w/ me cuz if his not i dont wann b wasting my time...he treats me really good im always first on his list he works alot during the week but on the weekends he tries to spend them w/ me all the time and he calls me everyday so i know his into me but i kinda wanna have that "famous talk" w/ him but i dont wanna scare him off or nothing like that i jus kinda wanna know where this is going and i also dont want him to feel like if i want him to ask me out already either...so what shouls i do???
2006-12-11 12:38:21 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is the biggest mistake most girls make. Dont have "the talk" and ask "where are we going?" If you dont know your position, than that is your answer right now. If he isnt calling you girlfriend, you are not at that girlfriend level. You are not commited to him and he isnt technicaly commited to you.
I suggest pulling away a bit, not sounding bitter or angry. But giving some space here and there. Dont always pick up the phone everyday, get busy and do other things with friends. But dont let him on with what you are doing. Always smile when you see him and just tell him that you were busy hanging with friends and such. Try this for a few weeks to see his reaction.
or if you do not want to do this, I would approach it this way:
Find the opportunity to joke about the subject of being exclusive. right now, you arent exclusive, even if he isnt seeing any one. It is not official as of yet. If he seems apprehensive about it, then you got your answer. You can choose to give it time or drop it from there.
or last, you can try this option instead:
Tell him you appreciate his company and like him very much, but you want to be exclusive with him. Dont beat around the bush on this one, but dont sound whiny or naggy if he doesnt pipe up "I agree!" immediately. Do NOT argue! That is the worst thing you can do. If he gives any other answer besides any form of yes, dont look disappointed. When the date/meeting is done, you got your answer and you need to pull away. If he really wants you, he will step up to the plate or run after you when he realize you won't stand to be just "some girl" in his life.
Do NOT try all 3 approaches. Pick one you feel will work the best and go from there.
2006-12-11 12:51:33 · answer #1 · answered by bluestar_dreamsx 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you...
I would say, "I love the fun and time we have together. Your such a great friend. But I was wondering, what is our next step? Where are we going with this?" Then I would do a whole lot of listening because the answers would not be what I want necessarily, but how he actually feels.
2006-12-11 12:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
next time he calls you or asks you out, till him you are busy or made other plans. The point is he should know that you have options, unless he has solid plans for the 2 of you, which he will have to talk to you about it as soon as he know that you are considering your OPTIONS. It's all about having or not having a choice, so go ahead and press him and if he likes you, he will come forward with his feelings.
2006-12-11 12:47:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, you're going to have to do it eventually. Just tell him about your intentions or ask him about his. It's better to do that when you feel like your intuition is telling you too before things go in the wrong direction for you. I say take control of the situation for your best results. Don't be afraid to talk to someone about something serious.
2006-12-11 12:43:53 · answer #4 · answered by ManderAnne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been down that road seeeeveral times. I was always being led on and it drove me crazy.
You should really bring it up by saying, "So... where exactly do we stand?" See what he says.
You don't want to be led on and you don't want to waste your time, like you said. You need to know where the 2 of you are. I wish I did that before...... I was only a naive teenager though.
2006-12-11 12:40:34 · answer #5 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should ask him to go out with you for dinner the next time you guys hang out... this way the mood is set right for whatever it is you need to know or ask..
talk to him make a good conversation, and then and only then at the right time.. just be like, I really like you and I would like to maybe go futher in our friendship. how do you feel/think about this...? and then just take it from there.. good luck girl
2006-12-11 12:46:20 · answer #6 · answered by endlesslove 24 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you seem him often just jokingly ask ...
Say we're hanging around all the time lately. Have we become a couple or what?
that may lead to : I don't know...would you like that?
2006-12-11 12:42:33 · answer #7 · answered by casp 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so you're not dating?
Tell him you were interested in ____, did he want to go with you. If he says no, there's no lost face b/c it's not like you asked, "Would you go steady with me?" (hehee, I think I'm funny, anyway!)
He's probably on Answers now asking a similar question.
2006-12-11 12:42:55 · answer #8 · answered by MithrilHawk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my heavens but you are pushy. it has only been two months. how do you know how you feel about him in such a short time. let things play themselves out for a while for you "both" to see how you feel.
as my father used to say, "act in haste, repent at leasure."
2006-12-11 12:42:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just ask him. I have tried just asking guyz and they were so happy, and later admitted they were shy.
2006-12-11 12:41:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋