it's totally illogical and can't work. i feel miserable. what can i do?
2006-12-11 10:03:12 · 13 answers · asked by jklmnop 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
it hurts my heart just thinking about them.
2006-12-11 10:04:58 · update #1
either get divorced or stop seeing the other person you are infatuated with.
old old advice. NEVER leave the one you love for the one you like.
2006-12-11 10:16:34 · answer #1 · answered by xbrex43 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Focus on something else. We all go through that, even though most of us won't admit it. Find out what is missing in your relationship, possible closeness, intimacy, not enough time together, arguments. Then someone else looks so good, especially if they compliment you or think you are great. But remember, if you were married to the other person, you'd be looking at someone else if things are not happy all of the time. It is so difficult to thinking loving thoughts of our loved one when something has interfered with the love/closeness...a fight, whatever. But obsessing over someone else, and compulsively pursuing that new person is a road to disaster. Always end one relationship honestly before getting into another. The grass only looks greener on the other side.
2006-12-11 10:07:55 · answer #2 · answered by dutchlady 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, first you need to decide if this feeling for the "other" person is love or infatuation, there is a big difference! If you belive it's love, then don't be cruel to your husband/wife and procede with a divorce, b/c you aren't doing them any favors staying with them.
If it's just infatuation, decide what it is that you like about this person, and maybe find these traits in your spouse. Chances are it's just that you are bored in your relationship and this person makes you feel like you used to with your spouse. Think about what you need to do to start feeling this way about your spouse again... work together to make your marriage what you both want it to be.
2006-12-11 10:11:57 · answer #3 · answered by *~Mom2aJellybean~* 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well...if you have feelings for someone else, the person that you are married to isn't the right guy/girl for you. Make sure that you really love the person that you are not married to because if you leave the one you love for the one you like, your going to end up getting hurt. If you love them the exact same...maybe your not ready for marriage.
2006-12-11 10:06:41 · answer #4 · answered by Jasmin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in Lust man! you got married to your best friend! You made a vow! you love your wife and remember your married! Or just tell your wife and get divorced and go get a quick roll in the hay and be miserable and let karma kick yo butt. I feel bad for your wife not you. Remember you felt that way when you met your wife.
2006-12-11 10:11:24 · answer #5 · answered by ladymissv 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nobody can help you with this problem. All that I can say is that if you have kids consider the damage that will come from pursuing your desire. If you are without children then you are free to do what you wish. Divorce and move on. If you desire someone else then your partner deserves to know this so that they can find the person that really desires them and they can move on. Maybe your partner doesn't really desire/love you either.
2006-12-11 10:09:08 · answer #6 · answered by MG 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My advice is to make of reasons why you love your spouse and the new person you have feelings for. Ask yourself:
1. Why did I marry my spouse?
2. What do I see in this new person?
3. Do I love this new person as much as I love my spouse?
4. What are this new person's faults?
Infatuation is technically love without true reason, but it is truly blind love...loving one for one's positives, and being blind to one's negatives. When you truly love someone, you love them for their pros and their cons.
If you are in love with this new person, and you don't know who to choose...give it time, and perhaps your emotions will unfold within you and give you an answer as to who you want to be with more.
Good luck!!! :)
2006-12-11 10:09:36 · answer #7 · answered by Tawny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to figure out why you think you have these feelings for this other person and see if it is what's missing in your spouse.
If so talk to your spouse and explain that these are things you need to have because you have found yourself looking else where lately and that you don't want to cheat or lose your Marriage over it...
2006-12-11 10:08:01 · answer #8 · answered by mistique1818 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow do you know how many people ask that question?!?!? Follow your heart no matter what. sometimes, people just get married because they feel like that's what they should do but chances are, if it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't and you've got to figure out why you're having these feelings for someone else. It's not easy, but it'll come to you (eventually) just hang in there and remember to listen to yourself no matter what.
2006-12-11 10:07:48 · answer #9 · answered by searching_for_my_adventure 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Avoid this person if possible, try to find new and interesting things to due with your husband. Get back in touch with the man you fell in love with. Try your best to make your marriage work and don't give this other guy the time of day. good luck.
2006-12-11 10:06:28 · answer #10 · answered by sneakymonica 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋