I'm in the library right now studying for exams with my bf. We've been dating for 4 months, and I've totally fallen for him. He told me he loves me and that I'm probably the best person he's ever met. That being said, he also told me a few weeks ago that he's jealous that his ex is dating again. He and I go to school in VA, but she's from MN (where he's from, too). He said he needs to see her over winter break to make sure his feelings are nothing to worry about. I know this is tearing him apart because he really cares about me. The problem is that he dated her for 3 years and even though he dumped her, he's having trouble thinking about another guy taking his spot. I can kind of understand this; I felt that way with my ex. Anyway, I'm sitting here super-jealous because I can't bear the thought of him possibly deciding he wants her back. I'm seriously about to explode here. Please tell me something to make me feel better. I'm going nuts!
2006-12-11 08:44:23 · 13 answers · asked by skichamonix515 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well, there isn't a whole lot to say, just, if he loves you, then you have nothing to worry about, trust him, all that you can do, try not to think about it (kissing him helps). just focus on your studies for now, when he gets back, then you can talk about it, i don't think he would cheat on you with some chick he dumped back at home, just remind yourself that he loves you :-)
2006-12-11 08:48:01 · answer #1 · answered by ccmfreak101 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time for you to be the adult that you want everyone to treat you as!
If something is BLUE, you can not change it by thinking about all the times or ways it might be green! How much you might care if it were green. That is all wasted energy.
We all know that when people honestly care, none of the issues come up that you have written about!
Real Friends NEVER hurt Friends! Love does not violate love!
There isn't anything really there - move on with your life!
People use both terms very loosely, with any stage of acquaintance.
Thirty seconds after the meeting its my BF or my GF and then a lot of anxiety because he or she did not do!
2006-12-11 17:01:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey girl, i totally feel for you... but the truth is, if he still is having feelings for his ex, it might be worse for him to see her again (it will re-kindle anything they had). When me and my bf broke up, we knew it'd be hard to move on so we didnt talk for the first 2 months of him being across the country. If your bf REALLY wants to get over his ex, (which he should if he loves you) then he should NOT see her. He should give it time... with any break up, it always takes time to fully get over eachother. And because he has you that should make it easier. But don't worry, everything will be fine, and if you two are in a mature relationship, whatever is meant to be will happen.. just give it time! :)
2006-12-11 16:51:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds like you dont have a choice, if he loves you he will come back. But protect your heart, he may choose her. I myself married a guy and all the years he wondered about her - we ended up divorced, with her being part of the reason why I left. 19 years later he found out she is a drug addict, alcoholic and don't even take care of her own kids (LOL) he got what he wanted oh right - A TOTAL LOOSER!!!
But to this day I wish that I would have left back then, when he still wanted to see her, it would have saved me a LOT of heart-ache!
2006-12-11 16:53:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look at it this way, he had the confidence to actually tell you what was going on. He could have not said he was going to visit her or still have feelings. Since hes mature enough to admit his feelings so far, i dont think you have to worry. He will again tell you how he feels after he visits.
Plus, you will know hes not lyng, so if he says hes over her, you will know for sure and feel tn times better about you two!
2006-12-11 17:20:56 · answer #5 · answered by WhatTheHell? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry he's being so cruel to you. Are you sure you want to be with someone who just told you he may have feelings for someone else (and it sounds like you feel like he'd act on them if he did).
People should not date until they are over a previous relationship...this makes it sound like you're his rebound girl. I'm sorry this isn't cheering you up (I'm sure) but it bugs me to see or hear about people being selfish and thinking more about themselves than the lives of those whom the care (or pretend to care) about.
You have every right to be anxious about this situation...I hope it works out for the best for you sweetie...whether that's for him to stay with you or not.
2006-12-11 16:49:58 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really loves you, nothing is going to matter about that other guy, and he will probably end up telling you, how's he's got the better girl. Don't worry!
2006-12-11 16:50:22 · answer #7 · answered by David S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him go. Say "I'll miss you" a thousand times, but let him get completely over this girl. Try to call him once a day to make sure he is still in line. Hope this helps!
2006-12-11 16:48:11 · answer #8 · answered by Person 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's o.k.! If he sees her he can make-up his mind. it is probably better he does it now instead of later in the relationship. It's early and now would be a better time to break up.
2006-12-11 16:49:23 · answer #9 · answered by Kristin N 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, there's is nothing on dis earth dat u can't do only if u think negative.but look dat's not da point,da point is,i don't think da boy is really gud for u.if he has been dating his ex for 3 gud years n he want her back,Honey i don't think dat boy is really right for u.keep focus n move on as he want to move up to his ex.so sweetie be cool n move on.
2006-12-11 16:55:55 · answer #10 · answered by diana b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋