For any Rabbi's out there.?

Question

Does an Orthodox Jew have the right to have 4 wives? Does the law say that they are to honor their wives by having sex with them once a week? And, should any of that be true, which Orthodox sect is it?

Thank you.

Answer 1

HI, I'm a Rabbi, and I'm going to answer your question one piece at a time:

1) Does a Jew have a right to have 4 wives?

THe answer is that a male Jew over 13 by Biblical law can have as many wives as he can support in an equal way without deminishing the support and attention given to his other wives.

There are limitations.

He cannot marry a mother and her daughter, or two sisters. Also the King may not marry more than 18 women based on the commandment, "He shall not accrue to himself many wives."

In the Middle Ages, Rebbenu Gershom, the leader of that generation, took a second wife, and his first wife tried to have him killed. He decided that women of our generation are more jealous than of previous ones, thus it is impossable to not diminish their support when taking a second wife. (He accounted the emotional stress they undergo as a diminishing of support.) His opinion was accepted by European Jewry.

Sephardic Jewry (From Asia and North Africa)did not accept it, and they still take multiple wives if they live in a country that allows it.

2) Does the Law say that they are to be with their wives once a week?

No. The law is complicated and how often they are to be with their wives depends on what kind of job they have. The actual interval can be as much as everyday for a wealthy, tax exempt man in good health; to once every 6 months for a sailor.

Also for at least 12 days following the onset of menstration each month, they are not permitted to be together, so even for the wealthy man, it works out less on average tghan the law seems to obligate him.

3) Which sect is it?

To review, Sephardim (there are many sects of Sephardim) can still take many wives. All Jewish married men are obligated to be with their wives certain times which very accroding to his career and physical health.

Answer 2

According to Torah Law, polygamy is permissible and there is no real limit other than 'too many', but not highly recommended.

If one has more than one wife, he must treat each with due respect and support and cannot diminish the support of the first for the second, etc.

That said, as having more than one wife is NOT, nor has ever been, a requirement of any kind, about 1000 years ago, it was rabbinically decreed that Jews have no more than 1 wife at a time. This decree covered only European Jews and continues to this day.

Further, it is Jewish Law that, when residing in a country other than Israel, one should obey the local laws when they do not conflict with Torah Law. With the rise of Christianity, monogamy became the law of the land in most parts of the world. As such, any Jew living in such a place would be limited by the local monogamy laws.

A notable exception are Jews living in Arab lands. As the above decree never applied to them and the countries in which they live permit polygamy, there are a handful of Jewish men in those countries with multiple wives. Many, for obvious reasons, have emigrated to Israel in recent decades and upon arriving are told that they can't take any more wives and it is strongly suggested that all but the first wife be divorced (although they are not compelled to do so).

Answer 3

there is no torah law against it, but the ashkenazic rabbis outlawed polygamy a long time ago. ashkenazim are about 80% of the jews. as far as i know there is no law against it in sephardic or other communities, but i have no idea whether or not they actually do it.