my two and half year old has become terrible.....?

Question

he has become a madness i dont know he dosent obey you he do things he know he is not supposed to he look into your eyes and he understand what ypou said and he simply said no and do it anyway he seems to enjoy doing what he is not he wont follow he is schedulle he wont take his nap he wont go to sleep on his tieme
what can i do to make this stop

i already buy a book but thanks anyway and another thing he has started to scream foir everything if you say dont do that because you are going to get hurt he start to scream and try to do it anyway he is constanly doing this like that he jump on the dvd player he hit the tv everybody tells me to ignore him but how can i , i get scared that he could harm himself

Answer 1

Take charge of your lives. Discipline is very important for small children, it helps them feel safe. Discipline is about setting up rules and having consequences when the rules are broken.

Example:
Rule: No hitting.
Action: Your child hits you thereby breaking the rule.
Discipline: Time out (1 minute for each year, 3 minutes in your case).

Hitting and yelling at children is not a good form of discipline. When you do things that you don't want your kids to do, you are being a negative role model and they will learn how to do it form you.

Answer 2

Well...My daughter started this at about 2 1/2 which was about a year ago and she has come a LONG way.

My suggestion is be patient and do not back down. At that age they remember everything. If you give in to them on something they know that you will continue to do this. My husband is a great example of this because he is a big softy. My daughter knows that she can count on him to give into her. But I have to be there to let her know that she can not always get what she wants, and crying and throuwing a fit will not help her. And she counts on me to do that for her. She knows that when I say NO, that is probably my final answer.

Like the previous answerer, try to keep them involved by helping with everything possible (shopping, cleaning up, cooking, bathing). It makes them feel like they are accomplishing something. My daughter loves putting her dirty clothes in the laundry room, helping bring in the groceries, and throwing trash in the trash can.

Children can sense your frustration. Try to remain calm so you do not make things worse for both of you.

I really do believe in discipline (in whatever reasonable form) from a young age. Cause take it from me, you can not teach an old dog new tricks. Once they hit their teens you want them to know where you stand.

Just hang in there and good luck.

Answer 3

You have a typical strong willed child. My 4 yr old is the same way and you deal with it day to day. Dr.s and others say that this type of child usually grows up to be very successful but that doesn't help the frustration you have now. Redirection and consistency are the keys I think. These kids need a lot of attention and don't do well unsupervised. I know you said no books but Dr. James Dobson has a good book about the strong willed child. It is most likely not ADD or ADHD.

Answer 4

You may have a very bright child who understands more than most and therefore understands quite well how to be defiant. Watch Nanny 911 on tv to get great techniques for controlling children so that they become self-disciplined enough to grow. It doesn't help if you're frazzled and can't enjoy him. So perhaps start by celebrating his obvious intelligence. Sometimes with a difficult child this age, it helps to only give 2 choices. They're making the decision, but you're controlling the options.

Would you like to take your bath now or would you prefer to clean up your toys?

"We're leaving in 5 minutes." Then announce 4 minutes, 3 minutes, etc. and then cheerfully pick him up if he refuses to go.

Answer 5

There are a ton of methods for discipline, but whatever you choose, you must be consistent (some people try timeouts, taking away toys, spankings... it won't work if you use so many methods!)

That said, what your toddler is going through is SO normal. While it's not okay for things like hitting, I think you should respect that he is just learning to control his environment and take charge. My son even started refusing to take a bath, which he loves!

I agree with the person above - give him choices whenever possible, even if it's what color socks to wear.

Let him be involved - help you cook (wash veggies, etc.), clean house, do laundry, etc. Try to keep the "No's" to a minimum (instead of No! try "chairs are for sitting", etc).

Don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting you don't discipline him, just that you also remember it's a normal phase.

Answer 6

my 15 month old is doing the same things. He refuses nap, and bed times. Has been doing this for almost a month. He cry's for up to an hour. I've been consisant with putting him in his crib anyway, and he is now starting to calm down and go to sleep, it is hard to do, but consistancy works. He needs to know you are still in charge.

Answer 7

You're the parent.

When he misbehaves, set a timer, and put him in a corner. No toys, nothing. For two minutes.

And two year olds are growing rapidly. They may grow out of naptime. Unless he is truly tuckered out from playing, sleep isn't necessary.

Once the naps are eliminated, his sleep schedule at night will become more uniform. Make sure he has plenty to do to run out his energy. Keep him focused with plenty of things to do to alleviate the boredom, and keep him out of trouble.

Answer 8

Sounds like a typical two year old.
They need your time and attention.
They will test boundries.
Time to head to the library or book store for a good parenting book.

Answer 9

They don't call them the terrible two's for nothing. I am not a parent so I can't offer great advice but to try to be as patient as you can with your child. Both my sisters have children and experienced similar things, if not as extreme as in your situation.

Answer 10

At two years old he is on the verge of that magic age of reason just be persistent and try to be gentile with your discipline he will get it eventually.