I had a hysterctomy the the day she died. My brother says there wasn't good enough representation from my family. This 1 1/2 ago. I have apologized in many ways. Now we are not invited to his son's engagemnt party or wedding which is in the Fall 2007. He has sent me 3 e-mails that were very hutful. What should I do?
2006-12-11 03:01:02 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
That is the ONLY reason why!! He sounds like a vengeful person. It may be best for you to stay away. I know this is hurtful to you to be estranged from your brother but if he is behaving this way then attempting to get back into his family will only result in more hurt for you. If I were you, I would keep my distance and wait and see if he decides to come back to you or if your nephew chooses to make contact.
I would concentrate on the members of the family who do talk to you and perhaps ask them questions about how your brother treats them. Even if he has not gone to this level with them, has he been hurtful to them in other ways? Believe me this is not because you did anything wrong. This type of behavior from your brother is wrong and it is your brother and/or his wife who are behaving wrongly.
2006-12-11 03:10:13 · answer #1 · answered by brighterdayscounseling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had just had surgery! I'm not sure how to handle this. I think your brother is behaving like a child. Perhaps if you had another family member, or even a close mutual friend speak with him - as a neutral party - you could work this out a lot easier. It was 1 1/2 years ago. Time has passed, move on. He needs to realize this.
2006-12-11 04:54:06 · answer #2 · answered by The Pope 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose he's been really hurt. I don't think he's being rational, though, holding this grudge for so long.
But, really, what can you do. Just keep the door open in case he ever wants to reach out to you. But get on with your life. It's sad that you may not be going to your nephew's engagement party or wedding. Why not just plan on sending gifts -- to show that you do care.
Don't let it bother you so much. You certainly can't turn back the hands of time and change anything. All you can do is look ahead.
2006-12-11 03:17:15 · answer #3 · answered by garynjanice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Family life can be very hard, but if that is why you didn't got to the funeral your brother should understand, He must have a problem,I was with a guys who's on sisters didn't go to there own Mother's and Father's funeral for no good reason at all, and they still talk to them. So I don't know what you brother's problem is. Maybe you could try to talk to his wife. If he's a true brother and loves you he should forgive you.
2006-12-11 03:09:31 · answer #4 · answered by cinpooh44 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it was his mother in law it was his family not yours. Tell him that you are very sorry that you did not attend the funeral but you just had major surgery and werent feeling well. If he cant understand that thats fine. Tell him you still love him even though he is being very hurtful to you and you still love his family and want to be apart of it. tell him that you cant make up for not going to the funeral but you would like to start over and continue having a relationship with him and his family. You did nothing wrong you didnt have to go to the funeral it would have been different if it were like his wife or something but it was his wifes mother no relation to you. tell him to grow up and get over it.
2006-12-11 03:18:31 · answer #5 · answered by tcameron_2004 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You reported the family contributors is nasty to you after which you ask your self why she did not invite you? did you recognize the guy? replaced into he an factor of your genuine looking he replaced into element of hers? You look particularly insecure to not permit you spouse circulate pay her admire at someones funeral without you. delight? recover from your self. somebody basically lost their existence. A family contributors lost their son/brother/cousin/ and so forth and you're apprehensive approximately not being invited to a funeral the place the family contributors does not even such as you?
2016-12-11 06:52:18 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your brother should give you a break since you were recovering from major surgery at the time of his MIL's death. Hopefully over the year leading up to the wedding, he will see the err of his ways. Just let it go for now.
2006-12-11 03:11:42 · answer #7 · answered by hollyberry 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that he is right for not talking to you anymore. I would be very hurt if I was him. You are very very shallow and he should never talk to you again. That's what I would do. Oh, I'm sorry, I read the question wrong. I thought it said your brother wife, not her mom. In that case, he probably should eventually get over it. Again, terribly sorry.
2006-12-11 03:05:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your brother is being extremely unreasonable....i would make one more attempt to save the relationship (tho i wouldn't be apologizing for anything that i didn't do wrong)....and then i would leave the ball in his court, and walk away.....if possible you can cultivate relationships with the other family members (sister in law, nephew, etc)
2006-12-11 03:48:56 · answer #9 · answered by SNAP! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
contact the nephew. let him know that you love him and congratulate him. if he invites you- go. if he doesn't then just send a gift. don't keep apologizing to your brother, he is the one being insinsitive. Good Luck.
2006-12-11 03:04:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋