stay with a husband i don't love? I never did. And 23 yrs. later and 3 kids later....i have nothing left...no feelings...no love...just pity. does God want me to stay with him?
2006-12-11 02:44:26 · 25 answers · asked by greeneyes 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
1 CORINTHIANS 7:10-11
10 ¶ And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
11 but and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. Mt. 5.32 ; 19.9 · Mk. 10.11, 12 · Lk. 16.18
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- The Bible is very clear about God's ways concerning marriage & divorce.
- If you never loved your husband it was still a choice you made to marry him.
- Mariage is a sacred covenant between God , groom, & bride. It isn't something to be taken lightly.
- Seing your pastor and/or a marriage counselor might be helpful. It may even lead you to pinpoint exactly what you & your husband need from each other.
2006-12-11 03:13:33 · answer #1 · answered by righton 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, how did you get married to the man you do not love? Then why did you let 23 years to go by and have 3 children and still say you don't love your husband?
Marriage is one of the only choices you can make in your life. You did not choose your parents, you did not choose your siblings. The kind of life you have at the moment is definitely a choice you made out of yourself and whatever or wherever you are in that state is not God work on you.
I can only think of something at the moment, you wanted to get out of the relationship but there is 23 years of togetherness and 3 children that will haunt you forever with guilt if you make a decision to leave. So you are putting the blame on God for putting the glue on you. Are you in love with someone else now and your hands are tied?
2006-12-11 02:59:31 · answer #2 · answered by Rallie Florencio C 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you believe that God is a God of love? If so, do you really think that someone who loves you would want you to be unhappy?
Marriage vows were written by humans, they do not appear in the Bible. I'd say after 23 years you gave it a shot. Life is too precious, and too short, to not be happy. I think if you stay you will regret when you die that you accepted a miserable situation.
2006-12-11 03:01:51 · answer #3 · answered by KC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot ask people what they think their God wants of you, because by definition, they can not deduce with certainty what God "wants." God exists beyond the human scope of knowledge and rational thought by necessity.
However, you can pray in this instance. If you were an amputee, you would not have your limbs regenerated through any amount of prayer. However, in this instance it will be more like meditation. Many times our unconscious minds continue to dwell on our conscious dilemmas, and come to us during times of relative ease of the conscious mind (dreams, meditation, prayer, etc).
I believe that living your life according to irrational ancient beliefs is what caused your problems in the beginning. You can start to view reality in a rational sense but sometimes the truth hurts. I feel it is very late in life to make that change, however. Isn't the time you spend on Earth ephemeral anyway? Just try to make it to heaven and you won't have to worry about how miserable your life is.
2006-12-11 02:54:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray about it is a good answer but what do you pray for? If you ask God for His will to be done, you know the answer before you pray (stay with your husband). My suggestion is that you ask God to give you His help in loving your husband. Do you respect your husband? That is more important than loving him. Ask God to help you respect your husband. If that doesn't work (and you've given it plenty of time) do what you have to.
2006-12-11 02:53:20 · answer #5 · answered by Fish <>< 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
coming from a proud non-believer, i say that if "God" has put you through 23 years of a bad relationship then i think that you need to sit and think more about your "God" im not telling you become a satanic heroin prostitute, but think about your life, you only live once and when get a chance to look back at things, do you want to remember all the good times that you COULD of had or all the bad time that you DID have?
all in all LIVE YOUR LIFE!!
2006-12-11 02:51:40 · answer #6 · answered by Wl 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You don't love him?
You don't love your situation?
How fat are you?
Are you eating your misery?
Or are you doing some other behavior like gambling, lying, alcohol drinking or drug abuse?
What do you know in your heart you have to do to stop abusing yourself?
If you aren't abusing yourself then what are you doing to yourself that's making you so unhappy?
Bottom line, What do you need to do to make yourself happy?
Me I needed to admit I was helpless over others.
I had to admit that my attempts to control everyone around me was a way to avoid that i was out of control and unable to deal with how i feel inside.
I turned my worries and my concerns over to my higher power and was aided as promised.
I'm working on making an inventory of my character flaws and how to make ammends now.
Good luck
2006-12-11 03:00:33 · answer #7 · answered by cinderpainter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God wants what is best for you but ask your children whats best for them because you don't want to see them in pain do you?Tell your husband how you feel things might turn out good.May be he might too be feeling the same?
2006-12-11 02:51:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop praying and asking what God wants and ask yourself what you want. Do you want to be unhappy for the rest of your life? Is being with him making you unhappy? If the answer to both is yes then stay with him. If the answer to either is no then leave him. Simple solution to a simple problem.
p.s. If your god wants you to be unhappy should you really be worshipping it?
2006-12-11 02:50:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
you know how it says in the bible that you should not get divorced then marry again unless the person you were married to dies well that isn't the way that it is always going to be you see if you don't love him and your mar rage isn't right then that someone that was made just for you is still out there waiting for you. and i say go get him and the lord he's a forgiving lord he will always be there for you through good and bad.
2006-12-11 02:51:35 · answer #10 · answered by Chris b 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋