I'm a catholic girl with principles.?

Question

I'm against living in with my boyfriend because I'm also against pre-marital sex. What should I do if my boyfriend asks me to move in with him? Isn't it immoral?

Answer 1

Committment is really the key, marriage the cultural and legal formalisation. Mary was only "betrothed" to Joseph when they went to Bethlehem, so the New Testiment's "first family" lived in sin by today's "standards". Living in the same apartment with separate rooms and seperate beds doesnt mean anything and is harmless. There is the practical consideration that if your partner is strongly attracted to you, then not having any release may drive him a bit nuts. You might compromise, by massage, masturbation or even oral, thereby avoiding penatrative sex until you're readyand comfortable, which it seems in your case is on your wedding night. I wish you good luck, good health and a beautiful relationship.

Answer 2

You probably shouldn't have to ask if a behavior is immoral or not. If you feel that pre-marital sex is immoral, and you don't plan on having sex with him, then it may not necessarily be a problem with you living together. Ofcourse, the temptation would always be there, but I'm assuming he already knows your views so it shouldn't be a problem.

That having been said, again, the temptation would always be there, and because you feel so strongly against pre-marital sex, your boyfriend should also understand that you wouldn't want a living situation that would constantly cause you to fight against your convictions.

Answer 3

This is something in, in my opinion, only you can solve, but I'll try my best to help you out.


I know catholocism has strict beliefs and rules. So I know what you mean about living with somone before marriage. In the eyes of religious dogma (the catholic church) it IS immoral to live with someone if you are not married to them. Same as having pre-martial sex.

So, ask yourself, are you ready to move in with him and go against your teachings? If you say no, then you should follow your beliefs and if he cares for you he should respect them. If you say yes, then be prepared to take criticism or morality lectures from those that you know and are strictly faithful to catholic teachings.

However if you love this guy or care for him, and only do things because of these reasons and not because he wants you to. I say you should go ahead and accept if you know and feel you'll be comfortable with it. In my personal opinion, I don't see anything wrong with living with a person you love and care before marriage. The only problem is that if you break up, well you have to find a place of your own. There are far more malicious sins than this. This is one of the additonal sins that the catholic church added to the 10 commandments. In my belief they're man made rules and not truly comfirmed by God himself, and I use to be catholic now I'm not affiliated with any religious church. Because the majority imply certain rules that were made by man, and keep adding as time goes on. Why restrict love for someone if you're not married yet?

Like I said this is something only you can decide. I don't want to change your beliefs or anything, but you should really think about the possible outcomes of living with someone.

Answer 4

I'm catholic too but I don't think it's immoral to live with a guy before marriage but I don't think having pre-marital sex will send you to hell either. But if you are one of the few people left that really truly believe that either of those things are immoral and could send you to hell then don't do it. Go to a all girls catholic college and live on campus or get female roommates. If he doesn't understand then you will find someone who does eventually.

Answer 5

That is entirely up to you. There is no law that says you can't live together, but in separate bedrooms. There is no reason you have to move in with him just because he asks. And you don't even know that he will. He may already know how you feel, and that your beliefs would keep you from making such a decision.

Since he hasn't brought it up yet, bring your feelings up the next time you talk to him. Broach the subject of how you feel about pre-marital sex, and couples who live together before the wedding. He may feel the same way, he may not. But if he knows how you feel, he won't ask you to live with him. And if he truly loves you, this won't change his feelings. He should be ready and willing to accept you as you are, religion, morals, and all, even if they don't agree with his.

Answer 6

It sounds like you already know the answer.

According to your principles (and the principles of your Church) moving in with your boyfriend (and having sex) is immoral.

Follow your conscience. If he loves you then he will accept all of you including your principles.

Keep the faith.

With love in Christ.

Answer 7

WELL IF U R NOT SLEEPING WITH HIM HE SHOULD ASK U TO MOVE IN! AND IF HE DOES JST TELL HIM I DONT BELEIVE IN PRE-MARITAL SEX! maybe he doesnt wanna have sex n he jst wants a room mate ! :)

Answer 8

Tell him, "No." Then tell him why. If he asks again, get another boyfriend. Different people may live by different standards, but if you start changing your standards for a guy, you never know where it will end.

Answer 9

Living with someone does not mean having sex with them.
What make syou think that living with him will mean you wilL break your morals? Will you be tempted or something?

You seem to have strong morals of which not many people have but seriously, living with someone does not mean sleeping with them,

Answer 10

If he asks, and you don't want to, just say no. If you don't approve of your boyfriend, move on. Judge not, lest ye be judged.