I need advise from a parent?????????Can this work?

Question

My younger cousin is 6 years old and was living with my parents but they can no longer take care of her because they say they are loosing energy for child raising.Me i am 24 years old and a recent college graduate who just got a job in NYC recently and am living in manhattan on the west side.I will be getting money to help me out while she is staying here to pay for anything she may need i do not know yet if its for good (her staying).Problem is i do not know anything about caring for a 6 year old?Can i do this?As it is i have to read up on the proper food she should be getting since my college food habits will not work.

I do love my little cousin a lot she is like a sister to me but i now nothing about raising a child .

The school she will be attending has an afterschool program till 5:30 so i think i will be okay .

Answer 1

You can do this. It's definitely a learn-on-the-job kinda thing. You will pick up the info you need. Get a book about raising children. Get her enrolled in school. Talk to her teachers about the situation. She should eat a healthy diet just like anyone else. Well balanced. Take her to a local pediatrician to have her checked up..and ask him/her any questions.

As for discipline...keep it fair, reasonable, and BE CONSISTENT. Set boundaries and have punishments that are appropriate for the action and dont be a push over..but dont be mean either. You'll do fine. Good luck.

Answer 2

Honestly, your situation does not seem to be the best for either you or the child. You just got out of school & seem to be on the fast track for starting your career. That takes a lot of time, energy & focus...think about it this way, would you have been able to care for & raise her during your college years? If not, why do you think so now? Did you have a social life? If you still do, do you have adequate child care & support from friends & family willing to babysit when you need a break? Children, even 1, are a huge responsibility & require a lot of personal sacrifice on your part. Your heart is in the right place, but before taking on that kind of a commitment (because that's exactly what it is), talk to your parents & other family members who may be better equipped in experience & situation to tend to the needs of an energetic 6 yr. old. If your parents are nearby, maybe you could try committing to give them a break 1-2 nights a week or on the weekends. That'll be a good gage to determine whether or not you want to commit to caring for a young child.

Answer 3

If you have a desire to have this child with you, then it will work perfectly.

First steps would be to find a good pediatrician and enroll her in school. Get to know her teacher and physician and be honest about your situation and ask for any guidance they can offer. Ask the pediatrician for a sheet about child nutrition. It's very easy and they'll tell you how many servings of each food group she should have each day. Don't feed her a lot of junk, sugar and fat, have plenty of fresh fruit and veggies around and you'll both be better off. Sounds like you've already got that covered :)

Get some books on parenting from your local library and be involved in her school activities, getting to know other parents. Visit the Parent Resource Center (generally operated by either the school system or community service agency where you live) for more information.

You can do this. There are plenty of 18 year old girls having babies who would be 24 with a six year old. You're obviously bright and well-educated and if you look on this as something to learn, you'll do well. Just don't forget to give her plenty of love and hugs in the process :)

Be honest with her about not knowing much about raising a child... but tell her that you love her very much and you're so happy she'll be living with you... and that you know you can work together and make it all work out. Ask for her help sometimes... in the kitchen or with dusting or emptying wastebaskets. Let her know that you guys are a team... but that if she has any problem at all, that you will find a way to work out a solution. Be a team... but make sure she feels your strength as the leader so she's secure and feels safe... and you'll do just great.

Answer 4

having a 6 year old around can be a joy and an pain. there is so much more to parenting than what you can read in a book or observe....You really have to want to do it. If you have good daycare set up and a good place to live and the money to raise her, as well as the heart, GO FOR IT. There is no better job in the world. For each and every mess or fuss there are twenty reasons to love a child more...

You obvously have been putting alot of thought into this...and you say you love her. Of course you can do this. You will make mistakes, we all do. That is part of life. Bless you for even thinking of taking her! There are many who wouldn't even think of it. The two of you will make a team, it will take a while, but you already have a great start, and you have your parents to turn to with questions...Good luck.

Answer 5

You are a good person for taking her. First of all, ask her what types of food she likes. Most kids like simple things. They like pb &J, soups, and sandwichs. For main meals they like speghetti, tacos, and simple things. These are things that you could make and have for leftovers the next day since its just the two of you. I would suggest finding a cook book like the four ingredient cook book or a kids fave cook book. I have both and my son loves the food. She needs to be in school, do some research on schools in your location, www.greatschools.com will help you compare test scores of the schools in that area. A 6 yr old is easier than a 3 year old. Keep her on a routine. Also if you work longer hours you may find a school that has an afterschool program or a preschool that has a school age program as they will pick her up from school which will help you out. If she is a good kid overall you won't have problems. They are very independent at this age and mainly just want your love, attention, and affection.

Answer 6

you sound like a very caring person. it is hard being a new parent. not knowing what are the right foods, the right toys, the right cloths..... so on, and so on. i give you alot of credit to take on your 6yr. old cousin. just love her, let her know she can count on you and talk to you about anything her little heart wants to talk about. she will let you know what she likes to eat. not to much junk food, though. a snack after school is good. a sweet treat after dinner won't hurt either. instant flavored oatmeal is a good and healthy breakfast. let her know you want and love her, you both will be o-k. daycare gets pretty costy, maybe find a nice older woman close to where you live to keep her until you get home from work. don't give up, it may get tough, but it will be worth it in the long run. do your best, trust your own judgment, and don't be afraid to call your mom and ask her what she would do or has done. there is nothing wrong with asking for help. good luck. you are giving her the home and love she needs to thrive and grow. love her as you were loved as a child and all will be great......

Answer 7

I believe you'll both be just fine.
You are concerned about her enough to try to make it work and you're sufficiently scared enough to ask if this is possible. There are millions of parents in the world that ask themselves the same thing every day. Common sense is on your side and that's the best thing to have for child-rearing. Even through your best planning, things will happen that you need todeal with, but how you deal with them is the trick. If she won't eat what you want her to (for her own health) maybe a good multivitamin will ease your concerns. That way you know her little body is getting all the vitamins and minerals in just the right amounts and it will take some of the pressure off of you. As for the other stuff, watch the movie Big Daddy with Adam Sandler and it will show you what NOT to do.
Good luck and God Bless,

Answer 8

Girl, you can do it if you put your mined to it. All you have to do is
make sure she has food, clothing, shoes, toys and most of all
hugs, love. She needs someone that will be there for her. A bed
of course and remember everything doesn't have to be expensive. Like you said while your in school, or work she will be
taken care of herself at school , plus a after school program, that
will help you out for a while. When both of you are at home all you
have to do is give her a space where she can play or watch cartoons or if you too want to watch TV together then she'll love
it too. Remember they go to bed early by 8 or 9 pm, they need
their beauty rest. 3 meals, 3 healthy snacks, water or juice. NO
JUNK FOOD. Let that be a treat or if you choose not to give it to
her that is fine, No Soda. When you have time and it is a nice
day take her out to the park so she can play at the play ground
exercise for a least one hour is good for any child. Reading to
her when you can is also good. All I have to say is you will do good with out a doubt. When she slips and falls and hurts herself
kiss her ouee's away, it'll make her feel better.

Answer 9

I have 26 and have a 2 years old daughter, but I'm married and so we are 2 who take care of our daughter.
If your parents are giving up, you might give up also, and I'm sorry for the child, because she has no fault. You might want to have a friend, and it will be difficult for you to make one, because you will not have too much time for yourself.
Best is to support with the money if this is the problem (and this should be the only problem for your parents, not selfish reasons).
She is old enough for school, so you could take her to a school where she could eat/sleep (at least stay all day), and keep the relationship. If she goes to an orphanage, it's like taking her to slaughter house, because she wouldn't be more than a woman with worst payed job, or even a prostitute.

Answer 10

I believe that when you decide to have a child (i.e. take on the responsibility of having a child) you need to realize that you are devoting yourself until the child is at least 18 years old. For you, that will mean, not going out with friends after work because you are rushing to pick her up at her school. It will mean no more vacations. Forget about seeing movies with a high rating than G. Be prepared to keep yourself healthy because your "sick days" at work need to be used for when she is sick. Children get sick and pass on colds as well as lice (rampant in even the most affluent communities). Your weekends may be spent hosting her friends for visits and sleepovers. What about school vacations, when you still have to work? Where will she go? I know I make it sound awful, but it's a huge undertaking. I had an absentee husband and had to raise 4 children alone. I had no financial assistance. My "adult" time is still limited, but getting better. However, this morning, my youngest crawled into my bed and cuddled with me and last week, my teenage daughter announced, "My mom is gorgeous!" The rewards are immense, but don't forget that when I entered into this, I thought I had a partner to share the burdens and joys. Good Luck!