I dont know what to say or where to begin!Am a very good looking girl with prestige,class and wealthy.A girl that anywhere she goes everybody looks at and admire!All of my friends and family say so.I have a boyfriend for almost 4 months now.He is very kind,sweet,serious,tender,caring he has everything!He is good looking as well( to my eyes at least).He is an average person financially.I live in a family where the parents rule!And in a society where you need to be with somebody of your "standards" or even more...My parents hvn't met my bf yet but they know lots of stuff about him.Even though they claim that they dnt want 2 b involved with my decisions they want me 2 meet a guy who as they say is up 2 my standards.I saw this guy once long before i met my bf, and he seemed nice. However,i feel like i've reached a level where i have to take some decisions for my future and i cant decide..I don't know what to do...Am so confused & i feel unable to hurt either my bf or my family.Am confused!
2006-12-10 19:44:21 · 16 answers · asked by Soulla 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
poony!! Thanks for your answer...but the point is i don't know what my heart says!!I just know that i don't want to hurt anyone!!
:(
2006-12-10 19:48:54 · update #1
I had the same problem. Only I am a well off guy and my gf was middle class. My suggestion is to introduce him to your parents. Do not lie to them about anything also don't randomly bring anything up. If they ask what he does have him tell them the truth but add on that he is working toward this.... If they ask about his family tell them the truth about them and if they become confrontaional (my folks did) then just politely attack them for juding him without any cause. Let them know how you feel about him. I am assuming that you two are pretty close or this would not be coming up. If they are not supportive at first give them some time. Don't parade him around though that will only make things worse. I hope this helps. Good luck.
2006-12-10 19:50:15 · answer #1 · answered by keith c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I know how you feel...My dad side in the Philippines is also very wealthy and many of my relatives base their judgements on peoples financial stability. Then again I see your parents point of view. If your as good looking as you say you are, and as financial stable as you claim you are, then find someone who can support your life style. Just imagine your life with your BF right now if you end up marrying him. Will he be able to support you financially? feed you the food your use to? Dress you in your upscale fashion, but most of all could he endure the mockery your family could imply on him. Sad but true. Follow your heart but use your mind. You have to think practical now a days, especially in the Philippines. I am so thankful I lived and grew up in California, I feel like I avoided this soap opera drama of Filipino aristocracy. I have cousins from the Philippines who have similar problems...I have you find your answer. Good Luck.
2006-12-10 19:54:56 · answer #2 · answered by confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
listen to ur head and ur feelings gut feelings
don't think about what any one wants
just for a minute pretend their was no pressure at all and no standards and just do what u would do if their was none of that
u cant go through life trying to make ur parents happy then u will end up depressed and on drugs with a husband who beats u up or doesn't really love u and u will Neva really love him
and who cares if his family id Rich or not ?
if he has a good job he can earn his own money rite ?
so trust ur heart darl
2006-12-10 19:49:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is your feelings? Are you in love with him? Can you predict that this man may be the next pulitzer prize winner? Can you tell if he'll be a good family man in the future as well? How well does he get along with you? Ask yourself and him many questions while you are still in a fairly new relationship. If you are both young...who knows what your future together with love might build? It could be a match made in heaven. Peace.
2006-12-10 19:50:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I attend graduate college for my draw close's at a school about an hour faraway from my abode. I initiate lower back day after today somewhat, I initiate artwork at 6:30am, artwork til 4:40 after I somewhat ought to leave early to get to classification by 6pm, then stay til 8:40 5, stress yet another 50 minutes abode, about 10pm and that i attempt this two times a week. and that i preserve my abode and function outdoors duties besides, i'm on forums, and so on. i'm comprehend-how that human beings choose help yet wager what i'm getting all my artwork achieved, at abode and at artwork and at college with out one else's help, nicely my boyfriend, yet i do not come on the following asking him to sparkling the kitchen or vaccuum. aspect is we are all busy and analyze is time eating yet you want to do your own artwork, it truly is so a lot extra worthwhile that way and also you study so a lot extra. good luck to all and dissimilar accessible who's convalescing themselves in a roundabout way too!
2016-11-25 20:19:26 · answer #5 · answered by wilcoxen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound very grounded and goal orinited. You sound like you are very independant. So you don't really need anybody. So it shouldn't matter that the guy is not rich. But that he can take care of hisself. Your parents sound cool too. So there really doesn't sound like there is a problem. Maybe you don't really like him that much? Are you settling? Don't settle! Get that knight in Shining Armor! He is out there keep looking! Good luck! Be Happy! Love yourself first and everybody will respect you for that :)
2006-12-10 19:51:36 · answer #6 · answered by Tiger Crane Master 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy you saw seemed nice, but you don't love him romantically, right? And as for your boyfriend, he is the one for you! It is the modern world now, you don't have to be of the same status to get married! First, you can meet the guy that your parents arranged (after all, meeting does not equals to cheating) and tell your parents about your feelings about that guy (as well as your boyfriend). That way, you wouldn't hurt either of them because your boyfriend would understand that you are not cheating on him but obeying your parents' wishes about meeting that guy.
2006-12-10 19:52:00 · answer #7 · answered by *azure* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not to be rude but dude money isnt everything happiness is. If you are happy in love with your avg finicial boyfriend then stay there. Your parents arent going to be the ones living your everyday life you are. No offense but you sound snooty and arrogant they way you talk about yourself. I hope that you find deep in yourself to make sure that you are able to live with the choices that you make. I am sure that your boyfriend truely and sincerely cares about you wether you have money or not.
I hope you find happiness and peace in your life and with yourself.
2006-12-10 19:50:56 · answer #8 · answered by kort 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dig it..its not like your going to marry this guy anytime soon so if you like hanging out with him then just do that your family should except you decision on the type of people you date they should respect you and your bf so don't hurt anyone just have fun and focus on what you want to do in life and do it if he can be apart of that then kool if you don't see him with you then worry about that when it happens tell then ask yourself how you really feel about him
2006-12-10 21:59:15 · answer #9 · answered by devildog_3025 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you are feeling is part of the process of growing up. Don't worry, just because you are beginning to make your own decisions and standing up for them does not mean that you love your parents any less. It just means that you are an adult and should be respected as such.
2006-12-10 19:47:32 · answer #10 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋