My fiance and I just had an argument, because he could'nt remember the day he proposed to me last Christmas. His excuse was he was busy then. But to me its like a smack in the face. I mean thats a major milestone in our lives. Am I being to sensitive? Or do you guys think hes right? Thanks for your help in advance...
2006-12-10 13:14:57 · 31 answers · asked by michaellandonsmommy 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
No your not being too sensitive, but you also have to take into consideration that it is in a guy's nature not to remember stuff like that. Its a gender thing.
2006-12-10 13:16:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
I have read everyones answers and have a bit to share. So here is my two cents- take it how you want.
Men and women think differently. We as women tend to put significant amount of importance on the little things because those are the most important to us.
Men on the other hand have the MAJOR things and remember those. If he doesnt remember the exact date he proposed, that is fine. The better thing to find out from him is does he remember when you all got married. Just because he does not know that date doesnt mean you arent important to him- you are, but he may just feel that the end result is MUCH more important to him.
You can spend the rest of your life arguing about dates, but i suggest just accepting the fact that he chose you to be his wife. He really only needs to know the anniversary, your birthday and mothers day. Oh and Christmas. Other than that, every thing else is just for sentimental reasons, and that is a womans department.
I dont think you are being insensitive, but i think you are asking for something that may be a bit beyond him. Just take it how it is- he knows that you are still engaged to be married. Please dont fault him however. Guys may be classified as not knowing- but they truly love you and will remember the big things...
2006-12-10 22:47:09 · answer #2 · answered by glorymomof3 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ha, I don't remember the day I met my lover, the day we started dating, our anniversary (not married yet), I don't remember when we decided to get married, hell, half the time I don't even remember the exact date of his birthday! I'm a woman though. It's not a gender thing. Some people just aren't overly sentimental. The point is that you are together now. The exact date doesn't matter much. You are being way too sensitive. Besides, that date won't matter much when you die. To me, the past is already dead. It's a fond memory, but really what's happening now is what is important.
2006-12-10 21:42:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be hurt. Luckily my boyfriend remembers everything important to do with our relationship, dates and all. It shows he cares.
He even remembers really odd things like for my bday this year he got me a giant beach towel, an advent calendar, rocky road from a certain shop, and several other things. They seem a bit odd and don't mean much to other people but why he chose them was because during our 2 year relationship I had at some points mentioned I had always wanted those things. On my birthday he presented me with one thing after another telling me the story behind him getting those..
He has never forgotten my bday and even though we've been dating for 2 years we still have a special day on the 18th of every month. (Our anniversary is the 18th December) which he has never forgotten.
So the whole "I'm male I don't remember dates" thing is just a pile of **** excuse men use to get out of having to remember dates.
-Elise
2006-12-11 01:24:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your being sensitive. There are only a few dates anyone should be required to know off the top of their head.
1. Your own birthday.
2. Your spouse/GF/BF birthday
3. Your parent's birthday (not your in-laws)
4. Your anniversary of your wedding.
5. Birth-dates of any children that you have.
That's pretty much the big ones. Anything else is gravy.
2006-12-10 22:02:49 · answer #5 · answered by Poppet 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are being a little oversensitive - the actual date is just a detail and most guys are not detail oriented while most women are. That means that most girls will naturally remember dates, times, the dress color, the pants he wore, etc - while the guy is more likely to remember "SHE SAID YES" lol.
It's not because he doesn't care about the proposal or the marriage - he just doesn't care about the details the way you do - and that is perfectly normal for a guy.
2006-12-11 19:01:54 · answer #6 · answered by Chrys 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not being too sensitive.. It's what you ladies do... On the other hand you must accept that WE JUST DON'T REMEMBER DATES.... Don't know why but this is generally true...
If you can get him to remember your Anniversary and Birthday then you have accomplished major milestones....
I would remember those dates but forget to get a card... Soooo one day I decided to buy a few cards for each occasion so I would always be able to whip one out when asked "did you get me a card???" - Why yes I did, let me go get it for you darling...
I tell my family (they're always mad because I don't remember birthdays), that they will either have to accept that I don't remember and remind me or just be mad at me... In my case, I just don't see me spending much effort on what dates I need to remember... I'm much to busy for that...
2006-12-10 21:22:40 · answer #7 · answered by gjm 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Get used to it. I have been married for nearly 10 years. My wife remembers every detail about the day I proposed to her, but I really do not even know the date. It is a fact...we are men.
2006-12-10 21:17:47 · answer #8 · answered by music 4 God 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
For starters first date date of proposal What you were wearing then
ALL DON'T MATTER
If he forgets your Birthday or Wedding aniversayr then he should be dead meat.
Men and Women think differently, they have different priorites. If the small stuff is going to get you mad NOW you might want to rethink if you are ready to get married. It is a BIG BIG step that you don't want to screw up.
2006-12-10 21:31:00 · answer #9 · answered by danzka2001 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh for crying out loud.........give the guy a break!!!!
However, I will give him a piece of advice for after he marries you (and for all married men out there)..........
3 important dates in your lady's lifetime you must NEVER forget:
1. Your wedding anniversary
2. Her Birthday
3. Mother's Day
Forget any one of these three during the year and you'll be lucky if you get out of the doghouse before the next date comes up!
2006-12-10 21:23:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
honey - the sooner you understand how people's minds work the smoother and less stressful your life will be.
My husband remembers every birthday - I do not
My husband does not remember the date he proposed to me - I do
What it boils down to is this - is it really that important? Then write it down on his calendar if you want him to remember it. Some people just don't compute the things you want or wish them to. It isn't anything against you, it's the way they think.
Also - the sooner you learn to compromise on this kind of thing, the better off you both will be.
2006-12-10 21:20:00 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋