my fiancee and i argue all the time...there hasnt been a day that goes by that we havent argued....i love him but i cant do it anymore...what do i do?
2006-12-10 12:43:13 · 8 answers · asked by amber 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Arguing like this is not healthy for you or for the relationship. It is one of the four danger signals in a relationship. I suggest you get pre-marital counseling. It can reduce chances of divorce by 30% Find out if you both want the same things and are headed in the same direction.
Sometimes the romance of love can shade the practical parts. Have you decided how to spend money? How you want your kids (if any) to be raised? What about how often you're going to have sex and who's going to ignitiate it? These questions and more should be considered before you take on such a serious life-time commitment.
If you find that the relationship isn't working, it's never too late to back out. It's better to do it now that when you're married. Up to 25% of engagements are called off.
I wish you the best and hope you think about the counseling, it may end up being worth it and help you figure out what to do. Sometimes love just isn't enough.
2006-12-10 13:01:00 · answer #1 · answered by ZippityDooDa! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 11 years. My husband and I have argued about 5 times or less. I'm amazed how people who argue quite a lot still are together - because I can't really relate to that kind of relationship. It would probably depend on the tolerance level of each individual. You're saying you can't do it anymore - therefore, don't do it anymore. He may be more tolerant than you are so it's as if it's normal.
You might want to talk to him about this and if both of you would change your ways, it might work. But if you end up arguing again, depends on how much more you can tolerate.
2006-12-10 12:54:44 · answer #2 · answered by Cindy M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, you're doing too much arguing. My bet would be that it is pointless stuff and the subject really isn't significant which is not to say there isn't a reason you argue. The fact that you argue IS important and you need to get that settled before you proceed. It will be a very, very long life if you argue every day won't it?
2006-12-10 12:49:57 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There can be too much arguing and it is up to you to decide how much is too much. There are some people who thrive on debate. I think what is more important is how you are arguing. Are there insults or putdowns. Do your arguments escalate out of control? Do things ever get resolved? Is there any abuse? Those are some things to look at.
You may want to think of couples counseling or I recommend reading books by John Gottman - they helped me. However, if there is any violence involved please get out of the relationship right away. I wish you well in whatever you decide to do.
2006-12-10 12:48:42 · answer #4 · answered by cotopaximary 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take a breather. if you are arguing like this who wants to be married to him. You need to figure out what is causing all of this. A lot of couple once they get the label fiance it creates a lot of drama around the idea of marriage. Get to the root of the problem. if its not resolvable maybe its time for some space...
2006-12-10 12:46:32 · answer #5 · answered by you know who 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Auguring is not good on a relationship if it's a daily thing,relationship will not last and you are already unhappy,let your partner go and find you someone that you can be happy with and no auguring,at lest everyday.
2006-12-10 12:49:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was you,then I would ask him to meet me some where that only you and him would be,then slowly tell him that you can't do it anymore,drop the ring in his hand hold your head up high,and walk away,no matter what he say's.
2006-12-10 12:53:14 · answer #7 · answered by theravenhairedvampire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell no sometimes its fun
2006-12-10 12:45:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋