Why can't I find a girl who wants me?

Question

Hey everybody, I'm 18 years old and a freshman in college. I'm not horrifically ugly, but I'm not a looker either. I've never had a girlfriend before. I've been on a couple dates but I'm a **** up. I always end up screwing something up or I'm "a good friend, but not boyfriend type". Part of the problem is I'm not outwardly shy, but I have a lot of trouble letting people get close to me. Everytime I try to open up to a girl, she just runs because I'm weird or something. The more times I get rejected, the harder it gets. I haven't been on a date in a few months and I feel like giving up. If someone could help me out I would really appreciate it. Thank you.

I'm 6'3'', I played basketball and soccer in highschool and I still work out almost every day. Physically, I'm strong, it's the other part thats hard

I've never used a girl before, but I have been used. It's no good.

yea, thanks man, the Barry White is ok, but I'm sort of a DeadHead, so I dk if that is gonna fly

yea, i'm not looking for sex immediately, i'm a virgin and i think that would just be humiliating for me

Answer 1

Dude, go for high school chicks. They're easier. Or, you should go for 30~40 year olds. They'll love you, and they're easy too. They can also teach you a lot about women.

Don't go for college chicks. You are a freshman. All of the freshman chicks are dating seniors. When you become a senior, you'll get to pick your litter of freshman chicks.

Also, listen to Tom Leykis. 97.1 FM. His radio show is awesome. It'll teach you how to get girls by treating them like crap.

Answer 2

TRY THESE FOR SURE :-
1.) try changing your mentality, try being a friend first - so that you both can understand each other. then only she might start liking you. normal girls(not the slutty ones) like to know a person well and see if it would work out or not.
2.) you have to go with one step at a time - none of the good girls would go to bed with you in 1-2 days(there are exceptions but you have to be extra smart ;-).
3.) DO NOT play with them. if it works good otherwise let her go. does not matter how smart you could be - cheating/playing /using a good girl could not be forgiven. (KARMA DEAL - what goes around comes around).
4.) if you just want sex - go to clubs - you can get a different slut every nite or spend some money and buy all the fun.
5.) but still its always advisable to be a little bit patient - girls like guys who are respectful and who have patience.
6.) MOST IMPORTANT - even if you get one soon - never try to change a s.l.u.t into a nice girl (not possible). a born s.l.u.t would die as a s.l.u.t.

Answer 3

The first step is to be confidant in yourself. Don't try to impress a girl, be confidant that the right girl will find you impressive.

Don't open up to fast. Give the "relationship" time to grow into dirty little secrets. Openness and honesty are great in theory, but keep them in check. You will come across as pushy or needy if you let too much out. Leave her something to wonder about.

Be comfortable and confident all the time. You are being watched and judged at all times. That is comforting isn't it?

Also, date because you like the girl, not because you like to date. It is a waste of both of your time and money. And it is using her.

Last, understand that while college is a time for making new freinds, it is also a busy time for everyone. With studies and social events, dating is sometimes hard.

Answer 4

First of all, please quit putting yourself down. You are not a ****up. You just need a little practice in the dating game. You seem like you have a lot to offer a girl beyond good looks. The first thing you need to do is have a little self-confidence. Women like men that have confidence in themselves. Hold your head up, square those shoulders and stand tall. Be relaxed and don't force it and most importantly, be yourself. Don't try to be something or someone you aren't. You have to love yourself before anyone else can love you. Start there and the rest will follow. The girls will start noticing you. 18 is too young to give up on yourself and on finding love.

Answer 5

Yo man, you are trying to hard. Take it easy. And go pick up some Berry White Cd's. Women always know when a guy is hard up for them. And they always leave him in the wind wondering what happen. So slow down.

Answer 6

Why don't you try doing something else with your women hunting energy. Like dancing or learning a new language. The more desperate you get the more harder it becomes. Don't get too edgy. Try to play it cool. Be yourself. That's all I can give you good luck. You'll meet someone eventually. Don't sweat it.

Answer 7

First of all have a couple drinks and relax. And why does everyone think they can just go out and find someone they click with? There's millions of divorced people out there to show you how hard it is, if you find someone you really click with it's more luck than anything else. Make yourself happy instead of trying to find someone to make your happiness.

Answer 8

Dude, me and you are in exactly the same boat. I go to Berkeley and I find I have the exact same problem (except for having a past girlfriend,) it's word for word the same situation I'm in. I hope to find someone who can help us both. But don't worry man, you're not alone!

Answer 9

If I were 6 years older I would go w/ u

Answer 10

i think you're putting too much pressure on yourself. if i were you i'd give myself a break for a month or two, focus on schoolwork, extracurriculars, whatever. it'll happen when it'll happen, don't worry too much. if everyone thinks you're a loser just because you don't have a girlfriend, then forget them!! they're not you and can't make your decisions for you. you'll find a great girl someday. good luck.