Why do girls not like nice guys?i can understand the guys who run around doing everything for them, but i cant understand why they dont like "gentlemen",as they know they wont get hurt.They go for the guys who are assholes and hurt them,then say i hate all men.
2006-12-10 08:42:12 · 12 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OK. I struggled with this one for... wow.. a long time. There are lots of reasons women skip past the nice guys, but the one I see that affects most people is probably this.. what is your role in thier life? what do they need you for? What do they want?
They want a man. Men are supposed to be strong. We are leaders of the dance with women. We are supposed to stand up and fight for what matters to us. We are to be independant, standing strong against the hardships of this life. Most importantly, women want us to be ourselves...
They do not want a "Nice guy". Nice guys are seen as trying to be nice because they cannot stand up for themselves. They want another's favor instead of simply standing on thier own against what everyone else says or wants of them. Women themselves are taught to be "nice" and to be accepted as such, so why would they need a "nice guy"?
Now, you might act "nice" but not be the "nice guy" that I described in the paragraph above. Trick is, how does SHE know that you aren't the paragraph above, unless you show it to her. You have to prove to her and yourself that you are a man. You have to show that you can stand up for yourself, be brave and stand strong while being yourself.
AND, let me broach your statement that a "gentleman" won't hurt a woman while an asshole will. Guess what kiddo, if you haven't broken a girls heart before, you haven't really tried.. People are different. We want things we can't have. Hearts are broken daily from the best of intentions because we try to get in close to each other and find out things don't work. Assholes are actually easier to break up with, should she have the need. The last thing most girls want to do is hurt someone's feelings. If you are a nice guy, maybe a little sensitive, yeah... she's probably not going to want to go there.
Now, with all that said, where do YOU want to be. Where is the "sweet spot" between being a gentleman and an asshole. Be a "good man". A good man can stand up for himself, be himself and carve out a life for himself on this planet without "needing" a woman. Now, when it comes to romancing a woman, a good man SHOULD be a gentleman, absolutely, but know the balance between being a gentleman and standing strong as a man. BE compitent. BE strong. BE ready to step up when the occasion demands it. THEN worry about a woman. If she's a good woman worth the time, she'll see you for who you are and respect you for the man you are. Being a gentleman then allows you to show her respect for the woman she is.
Also, keep this in mind, because it is key. Why do women want a man of absolute confidence? A man of strength? Because despite everyone's efforts to destroy the "roles" of a man and woman in this world, most women still want a man to lead. You can have all the interest in the world for a woman, but nothing SAYS that you do like walking right up to her and asking that girl out. You say it with firm resolve and most girls, who aren't already taken, will at least say yes once. If she's any kind of good woman, she wants you to be a good strong man for her. So, whats stopping you?
I've had to grow through a lot to learn this, so don't take it lightly. Don't become bitter about it, like I did for too long. Rise to meet the challenge and focus on being a strong man. A good man. Then, those girls better watch thier hearts, or you might just steal every last one of them.
2006-12-10 09:28:17 · answer #1 · answered by guardian707 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Good Question. Some girls like what they call the "bad boy image", cuz he shows "strength and non-punkness"...which is not really true because a guy could be a gentlemen and no when its time to defend himself if need be..the bad guy usually hurts the girl in the end. More and More girls though, are looking for a gentlemen., so don't get discouraged......there are still some girls who still goes for the bad boys but thats on them....a gentlemen always outweighs a bad boy..they have more class and dignity*. And yeah some girls are like i hate all men when they get hurt by a bad one..but they should look to other options and learn from their mistakes...and once they do that they wont make a mistake of picking a jerk again.or if they do its there lose of missing a good guy..
2006-12-10 08:50:19 · answer #2 · answered by nativebeauty22 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a sad fact of life. I'm still trying to fathom this paradox myself. I guess a girl wants to feel the excitement that bad guys give them, but dont really want to be with bad guys. The solution is a nice guy who acts like a bad guy....? Scre wy but it might just work.
2006-12-10 08:46:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I asked a very similar question myself last week. I just don't get it! People are crazy! All they care about is looks!! I feel that I'm pretty attractive, but when I would go out, the nice guys would never approach me, only the really old men, or the ones that didn't have a job!
GREAT QUESTION!!
2006-12-10 08:46:30 · answer #4 · answered by oracle1 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok the nice guys finish last. Girls are crazy and stupid. If they truely ask themselves how they want to be treated in the first place they would find they want a nice guy.
2006-12-10 08:45:28 · answer #5 · answered by masterzuaba 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe its just the people where you live. Everybody's different. I think you'll find someone that'll apreciate you the way you are as you grow up. If you're the "gentlemen" kind, then i suggest you keep it up.
2006-12-10 08:45:13 · answer #6 · answered by =\ 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Because girls are addicted to drama and attention...I have experimented with both approaches and the one that works for me is to treat the women like trash..
2006-12-10 08:45:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because they are used to getting hurt all the time.
2006-12-10 08:45:09 · answer #8 · answered by spikey200maximum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girls like nice guys, it's just we seem to always run into the jerks before we can fall in love with the great ones.
2006-12-10 08:45:53 · answer #9 · answered by sarah 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
i agree i am a very nice person but no girls like me if you wanna talk more just email me at meep103@sympatico.ca!
2006-12-10 08:44:47 · answer #10 · answered by andres c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋